10/15/2025
The other day my friend and I were talking about relationships. She mentioned being concerned about repeating relationship patterns from the past. That is a concern may people who have been divorced have.
Have you ever felt like that? I know I used to feel the same way.
What I shared with her, and what the truth of the matter is, is that our experiences are designed to refine us and not define us. Going forward, we are less likely to show up the way we have in the past.
We now have more insight into what we want, we understand what didn't work, and are more likely to set boundaries that we previously hadn't.
In order to feel confident moving forward, we can and need to let go of the idea that we are the same person we were before our last relationship. We are consistently evolving. Though letting go of this identity can feel a little uncomfortable, and it may take a minute to see and understand who you are now, it is also exciting and liberating. Typically that's when you know how you've grown.
We can let go of the expectation that future experiences will bring the same outcomes that past relationships have. The meaning we assign to our experiences is critical to our success and mental health. We absolutely have the power to choose how we respond to the past. With intentinal thought, and mindfulness we can realize we are more than any single event or even a season in life that has shaped who we are now.
What is one thing you will change about how you show up in your future relationships?
