12/07/2023
I NEED a nap. I can feel my body recalibrating as I shift fully into this new being.
Over the last few years I have been integrating everything I have learned through experience of my first 3 decades of life. Better communication. Better time management. Best self care. Doing what I say when I say it. Speaking up. Owning my truth. Owning my wisdom. Getting rest. And so much more that is deeply personal to me.
It's like going to the pool. Excited to swim each time. Swore I was going to get in and have a ball do you hear me. I'll even tell my babies I am getting in the water and they will be all excited....
yet....
I'll jump in the water, then jump out never to get back in.
I'll sit on the edge of the pool and dangle my feet.
I'll just stand by the water and look at it. Smile at everyone and cheer them on.
Shoot alot of times, I'll read a book and just look at the water wishing I would be brave enough to get in.
Whelp the question is, and I going to sink or swim? Baby I want to swim. I want to feel the water on my skin. Feel the water through my hair. Laugh and joke with those in the water. Show off my swimsuit as I keep diving in testing out new flips. LOL
I say that to say, all of those moments of seeking to get in the pool is cool. But I went to the pool to get in and swim. Period. So I'm gone swim. Even if some of the people I came to the pool with decided they aren't swimming. NOT my problem.
I started this journey to change MY life. To evolve. To step into the truth of who I know I am. The truth of who I know I am meant to become.
I've said some deep things over the years, always knowing it was wisdom pouring out of me to be seen and heard by ME when I was ready.
I'm just here to share, I am sleepy. LOL. Because I am in the being of it all. Everything I said I'll BE is here. I am being her. And my vessel is being stretched to contain her fully. I can feel every part of me expanding. She, I, respond different. It all is just different.
I will cry, I will cramp, I will have a cough, I will get sleepy, I will get itchy. Whew I am stretchedddddddddd.
So a nap is needed lol. I'll honestly rather recalibrate majorly in sleep, but I also know alot of the real work happens while I am awake. And THEN I rest to allow the "being" of the day sink in as I rest. Sink into my DNA, sink into my memories, sink in on a cellular level.
This allows each day I wake up, I am waking up in the newness that was kicked off from the previous day of moving as her.
So yea again I am sleepy, and you may just be too. You're recalibrating. Acknowledge the truth of what's happening. You truly aren't who you once were. Thank him/her and allow them to shed and welcome in your new skin.