Be Merry

04/15/2024

Sharing broadly as Gina Mariko Rosales is the most awesome entrepreneur I've never seen!

Gina runs an amazing women-owned creative events agency and they are launching their newest FESTIVAL here in the Bay Area! 🤩

🍷 POC Food & Wine Festival
🗓️ May 2 – 5, 2024
📍 , Berkeley & , San Francisco, CA

It's the FIRST POC Food & Wine Festival in the Bay Area happening on May 2-5 - a 4-day festival experience like no other 🎊 Created by Make it Mariko - the same event producers of the award-winning Filipino Night Market - POC Food & Wine Festival is a celebration of the global majority and our allies, in food, wine, music, and culture.

The festival will highlight multiple events throughout the weekend featuring some of the most talented diverse creatives, tastemakers, chefs, fashionistas & entrepreneurs in the Bay Area and beyond. Some Chefs were featured on Top Chef, are James Beard nominated, and Michelin starred so it's a really amazing lineup!

Let's help support our local small businesses!

Here are just a few of the amazing folks being featured:

🍽️ 🍲 CHEFS








🍷 🥃 WINE, SPIRITS & BEV






🎧 🎵 DJs & MUSIC







🎟️ Tickets are now LIVE at pocfoodandwine.com/tickets

Celebrating the global majority in food, wine, music, and culture. Get your tickets now before they sell out!

03/18/2024

Took myself on a date for sushi and chawanmushi (my favorite)

Because everyone needs breaks, especially moms

08/14/2023

New blog post! Fall = perfect time for renewal

As we transition back to school and the regular routine, as moms, some of us will suddenly realize that we have our lives back! We get up earlier, go to bed earlier, and whoa, we get a whole 8 hours of no children? What will I do with all this time??? (Well, besides work, of course. And cooking brea...

08/08/2023

New blog post up, just in time for back to school!
http://wix.to/KaQrS8B

05/11/2023

Check out my blog post

One of our favorite “practices” when our family goes on a trip, is we plan for the breaks. As a general rule, We hire a babysitter to come in once every 3 days (so, for a one week trip, 2 babysitter visits) We give each other a night off at least once per trip We’ve realized that the intersper...

03/25/2022

When was the last time you thought to yourself, “am I a bad mom for __________?”

For me, it was a few weekends ago. We were on a 4-day family trip and I got into full “activities coordinator” mode and scheduled activities for each day, including planning out our lunch & dinners. I got so deep in my trip planner space, I forgot to schedule some time OFF for myself.

So then, on Sunday, when my husband made a comment (about something completely unrelated to the trip, the kids, or anything), I lost it. After ugly crying and yelling, I thought, oh no, “am I a bad mom for not wanting to spend this much time with my kids???” Yikes.

Thankfully, my very supportive husband talked me off the ledge, and we decided, for the next family trip, we’ll make sure to each take some time off for ourselves. Whether that’s to take a walk, or get a massage, or read a book. The reality is we ALL need time away from each other, even the people we love the most.

I’ve also come to the realization that my husband and I are very different in our parenting styles/preferences. I like having something to do: take the kids hiking, or go to a museum, or to a park/attraction, but for a short duration. I can get 100% into doing the activity, but then I need a break.

My superpower is I can get the kids to do just about everything, or at least try it once. During the pandemic when we went hiking every Sunday, a lot of moms asked me, “how do you get your kids to go hiking?” And the answer is, “I just do.” I’m really good at getting them excited to do an activity (“It’s Sunday! What do we do on Sundays? We are going HIKING!!!”), and I ‘m really good at actually making it happen (getting everyone dressed and in the car, getting the kids to walk, even if it means dragging them up the hill) and making it interesting (look at that tree! Look at all the moss on it!). But after all that excitement, WHEW, I need a break.

My husband has more of a low-key style: he can handle many hours of casually hanging out with the kids. He’ll be on his computer doing his stuff (usually some version of work/personal tech project), while the kids are doing their own thing (drawing, making a craft). Occasionally the kids come by and ask for his help, and he helps them. But otherwise he leaves them alone and they sort of coexist in the same space. He’s more patient, and can handle a higher degree of chaos than me. He’s also able to handle many more hours of “low key parenting” than me.

On the weekends, we usually do ONE main activity per day - for example, we take the kids hiking on Sunday. When we hike, I spend the entire time engrossed with the kids, having discussions, answering questions, pulling/pushing our little one up the hill.

Then, after lunch, I need a break. Usually in the form of a nap. And my husband takes over. If the kids rest, he gets some quiet time. Otherwise the kids would play in the garage while my husband works (not necessarily work stuff, but on his computer). And then we all reconvene for dinner.

Where we get into trouble is (1) there are multiple social events in a day and my husband gets burnt out, (2) we over schedule and neither of us gets down time.

Back to where we started. I think no one is ever a bad mom, but we do need to do better for ourselves and be clear (and speak up) about what we need. In my case, since I tend to over commit, I need to schedule a break for myself so I don’t burn out. In my husband’s case, we need to keep our social commitments to where he doesn’t get “socialized out” at the end of the day. And, where possible, we need to encourage each other to take breaks too.

So, when we got home from our trip, I booked a sitter so we could each have the night “off.” I went to a Zumba class, and my husband got a massage. Now everyone is MUCH happier (also the kids are back in school, which helps a lot).

Parenting is truly a marathon, and going forward I’ll be more mindful of when I need a water break. Instead of thinking of myself as a “bad mom,” I am going to start thinking of myself as a human being. And all humans have basic needs: need for sustenance, need for rest, need for love/connection, need for socialization, need for stimulation, and need for downtime. And it’s not a good/bad thing to want/need all these things, it’s just human nature.

What are your parenting strengths? Where do you over-stretch and get burned out? How do you take time for yourself? Comment below and share your thoughts!




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12/13/2021

Not sure what to get for the mom who always invite your kids over to play? Or the coworker who always gives you credit?

Instead of physical gifts, why not sent them a gift certificate to a nice restaurant out? Better yet, have Be Merry do it for you!

I just bought a gift certificate for to Vargas Cut & Catch for my brother-in-law and his wife (they are in Texas) so they can enjoy a night out on us.

11/11/2021

I celebrated my 45th birthday last month. 😳

45. It seems unreal. I remember turning 44, vaguely. I sort of remember 36 and 40, that’s when I had my kids, respectively. I’m a little unclear how the other 35 or so years passed by.

I still feel the same. Squishy-er around the edges and more health screenings, but otherwise I feel as healthy and alive as ever. I remember when I was in my 20s, 40s seems really old. And now that I AM really old, somehow I don’t FEEL really old. I feel like me. I still like the same things: cooking/eating, hanging out with my friends, dancing, hiking, working, taking care of my family. Other than “The Big Quit” this year (I left my job at Google after 18.5 years), not much has changed.

Except it has.

This year, and from this point forward. I have decided to love with vigor. 💕

There are lots of different kinds of love: there’s the love between you and your partner, you and your children, you and your closest friends, and the love you have for your community and country.

Except there isn’t?

Maybe it’s the pandemic, maybe it’s all these years of therapy (14+ and counting), maybe my kids have turned me into a giant softie, but it doesn’t really matter.

Love is love, and I love everyone.😍

I don’t mean random people at the grocery store, I also don’t mean people that I don’t like, or don’t enjoy spending time with. But if you’ve been part of my life for the past 6 months, 6 years, or 16 years (or more), I. Love. You.

I don’t mean it as a physical thing - we don’t have to make out. 😆 I don’t mean that the love has to be reciprocated, it doesn’t. But I do love everyone, vigorously, deeply, and with all my heart.❤️

I love my Zumba community who have welcomed me into the Z family. I love the shout outs and hugs, I love when we color-coordinate or do “theme days” and I had to bust out the ONE 80s-8sh outfit I have (but it still fits!) I love being invited to random lunch/coffee outings, I love celebrating birthdays with people I barely know. I love the texts and the FB messenger text chains. I love it all. 💚

I love my bestie and I love our girl dates. In the middle of the pandemic we decided to do outdoor walking girl dates: we’d get popcorn chicken, eat it at a park bench, and walk around the park/block until our legs gave out. I love talking about everything and nothing. I love venting about our husbands and talking about our children, or bitching about our mutual friends. It’s something I look forward to all week.💜

I love my friends that I see occasionally, but each time is filled with profound joy. Whether it was a walking date, an eating date, or something in between. The conversations make my heart sing. 💛

I love the 3rd grade moms who randomly decided to join me & Leo on “Mommy + Leo Adventure days” when school is closed. I love their adventurous spirit (it’s always an adventure when you’re with me!) and our shared love of our school community. 💙

I love the “old” friends, the friends that I’ve known from the early days of social dancing (early 2000s). Though we don’t see each other all the time, each time we do, it’s like no time has passed. While we’ve all surely aged in our own ways, in my eyes they all look exactly the same as the day I met them.🤎

Could be controversial, but I even love my little Facebook community! I love the people who “like” or comment on my posts - I feel like we’re connected, even in just a tiny way. I love the people who make a point to say nice things when they go check out a new restaurant, or hike a new trail because of me. I feel connected and seen.

I love the random people I have lunch with. Some folks are new and some I’ve known for 20+ years. I love getting to know the “new” people and finding out what they’re passionate about. I love hearing about friends’ lives and their own adventures, each one a unique story in my book 🤍

I didn’t know I could love like this. It was like a floodgate opened, and all the love gushed out. I didn’t know there could be love without condition or cause. I didn’t know that love could exist, even for someone I just met.

But there it is, right in front of me. It’s not something that happened, it’s something I chose. At each turn, I CHOSE LOVE. I choose love because I know I’ll never regret it. That even when it’s not reciprocated, it’s better to have loved than not at all.

45. That’s halfway to 90, no? And when I’m 90 I want to answer these two questions with definitive “YES!”

-- Was I loved?

-- Did I love well?

Here’s to love. I wish you love in your life. From now on I will choose to love with vigor, laugh with glee, and live with no regrets.

Love you all.

09/23/2021

It's Fall! My favorite season of all!

The day is getting shorter, the leaves are changing colors, BUT, there are Pumpkin Patches to make it all better!

Here's a list of Bay Area Pumpkin Patches from the The Mercury News: https://www.mercurynews.com/2021/09/21/halloween-2021-12-bay-area-pumpkin-patches/?utm_email=D48D245585F28502E539928E39&g2i_eui=gXJ24v9BkFjaA9fhz84iPzXOK1ihK4xa&g2i_source=newsletter&utm_source=listrak&utm_medium=email&utm_term=https%3a%2f%2fwww.mercurynews.com%2f2021%2f09%2f21%2fhalloween-2021-12-bay-area-pumpkin-patches%2f&utm_campaign=bang-mult-nl-morning-report-nl&utm_content=manual

My favorite one is the Pumpkin Patch at Webb Ranch. We visited Webb Ranch last Fall (2020) and my son said it was his "favorite day of the year." 😁 (Some pictures from last year's visit below)

What are some of YOUR favorite Fall traditions? Please share in the comments

09/16/2021

In my late 20s (after I started working at Google), I learned about Burning Man. I heard that it’s basically one giant party in the Nevada desert. There were no rules: you can wear clothes (or not), you can bring food and trade with others (or not), you can shower (most likely not). Apparently this is the Silicon Valley techie’s way of “living off the grid” for a week.

[It’s called “Burning Man” because there’s a giant statue of a man, built with a wood frame. At the end the week they set the “the man” on fire as a symbolic middle finger to corporate America, or at least I think that’s how the story goes]

Later on, I had many friends who went to Burning Man. There were intricate preparations in place: when to strike when the tickets go on sale, whom to camp with, what to wear (somehow there are costumes involved?), what to share with the community, and more.

Never once in the conversations did the festival of seemingly lawlessness appeal to me. What DID appeal to me, was the exodus of all the people out of SF and its surrounding areas.

When Burning Man did happen (it was canceled in 2020 and 2021 due to Covid), the city of San Francisco, and its surrounding neighborhoods became…. Quieter. With all the ragers and bangers gone, there was an abundance of parking, and instead of waiting in lines for brunch, one would literally waltz in at 10:00 am and score a table for 4. I know, because I did this.

Starting in 2018, Ben and I started fulfilling the dream of spending Labor Day/Burning Man weekend in San Francisco. Our first year we scored a little Airbnb in Pac Heights/Cow Hollow, walking distance to Union Street and all its great restaurants, including my personal fav, Le Boulangerie. With a toddler in tow (A was 1½ years old), we literally strolled in on Saturday, got food, and enjoyed an amazing breakfast. We also walked all the way down to Fort Mason, saw the Golden Gate Bridge, meandered, before coming home on a Cable Car. It. Was. Incredible.

Year 2 we found ourselves in outer Noe Valley, at a kids-friendly Airbnb on 30th Street. We walked EVERYWHERE - to dinner. To ice cream, to the upper Noe Valley Playground everyday.

We skipped this tradition in 2020 because, well, you know.

Determined to return in 2021, this year I started making reservations in May. We found an amazingly spacious pad, this time in the outer Mission District (in the gentrified area). We walked to the Franklin Square Playground every day, we walked to Mission Dolores Park TWICE, we walked to Valencia for Smitten Ice Cream. Kids loved the adventure, we ate ALL the food.

Did I mention how good the food is in SF? On this particular sojourn, we visited Flour + Water with the kids (yes, they have kids’ pasta, which is basically tube pasta soaked in butter, we literally had to get 2 servings because kids tore through the first one). We also stopped by fan favorite Tartine Manufactory for breakfast (reservations were hard to come by) and brought home a bunch of pastries for the next day. Ben LOVED his almost daily lattes from Sightglass Coffee. Ben & I even enjoyed a date night at “Al’s Place,” which was still buzzing after its recent Michelin One Star win.

So how do you plan these trips, Merry? Glad you asked! Here are some tips to get started:

1. Though Ben and I are partial to fancy hotels (my personal favorite is the St Regis right next to SF MOMA), Airbnb is probably the more practical lodging option when traveling with young children. In our case, I literally scope out each Airbnb and see what’s in the surrounding area: Which restaurants can we walk to? What coffee shops? And most importantly, WHERE ARE THE PLAYGROUNDS? I also like it when the airbnb is close-ish to a busy street (say, Mission Blvd, or 24th Street), but not actually ON the busy street.

2. Focus on ONE neighborhood at a time. San Francisco is a big city with lots to offer. You could try to do it all and be physically and emotionally exhausted, OR, you can pick a great neighborhood and truly live like a local. Go to the local coffee shop (not Starbucks), check out the bakery in the corner. Almost every neighborhood has an ice cream shop. :) For the most recent trip, we were staying in/near the Mission, and there are literally hundreds of murals in the neighborhood. We’d stop at each one, and observe the mural and what we think it wanted to share, or is it a nice picture that someone drew. There’s SO much to see, I can’t say we’ve ever run out of stuff to do in a particular neighborhood

3. What gives you light/energy? Do THAT. Do you enjoy museums? If so, plan your trip/stay around the museum/arts district. Do you enjoy swanky shops? If so, maybe Pac Heights/Nob Hill is your speed. In our case, our mutual passion is FOOD. As mentioned above, I’ll literally scope out the restaurant scene before booking the Airbnb. What would enrich your soul? Do that and stay someplace that makes it super easy.

4. Optional, but if you like having structure, plan ONE major outing during your stay. Our first visit to SF, the major outing was to see the Golden Gate Bridge. So we did -- we actually walked through the Marina to Fort Mason, grabbed coffee then walked all the way down to the Yacht Harbor, before returning via Cable Car. Year 2 we spent the day at The Exploratorium, which was exhausting but SO worth the visit. This year we spent most of Sunday at the Bay Area Discovery Museum and my only regret was we waited this long to visit. It’s amazing in every way.

5. Plan for some downtime. City living can be really fun and exciting, but it can also be a lot (especially for kids). Plan about a 2 hour “downtime” each day to give everybody a break. If your kids still nap, the nap time is a natural downtime. Otherwise maybe they could read, or even watch their tablet for a bit. Overstimulation is real.

6. Finally - book a babysitter! Plenty of good ones on Urbansitter. Or, if you already have a regular babysitter, ask if they would be willing to come up to SF for the afternoon/evening. In our case, one of our regular sitters was already planning to be in SF that weekend and she babysat for us for 4 hours, which was glorious for us, and didn’t interrupt her birthday weekend plan. It was a win-win.

Next year, I think we’ll plan our trip around visiting the Golden Gate Park and eating ALL the good food in the Sunset/Richmond. Our flagship activity would probably be visiting the SF Zoo, unless we just decide to spend an entire day at Golden Gate Park. The good news is, the City is literally our oyster.

In the years to come, I hope to spend weekends in Chinatown/Little Italy, Hayes Valley, or maybe near the Ballpark. The options are endless. If it works out, I’ll get to spend the next 10 Labor Day weekends with my boys in San Francisco, and that would literally be my dream come true. 💕

What are your family long-weekend traditions? What would be your dream come true? Share with us in the comments below!

Or, let Be Merry help you plan the perfect getaway!

09/03/2021

Just in time for Labor Day Weekend… Here’s a trip report from our visit to Great Wolf Lodge

In 2020 we visited the one in Anaheim, which was the one closest to us at the time. We stayed a full week (Monday-Friday). We’d have breakfast in our room (Dunkin' Donuts For The Win), then hit up the waterpark. Kids would do unlimited water slides + swim in the wave pool + float in the lazy river, then lunch in the waterpark (not great, but whatchagonnado).

In the afternoon we’d come back to the room, shower, then A would blissfully take a nice, long nap; while L gallivanted about on his Magi-Quest (similar to a scavenger hunt). In the evening we’d find a nice park to play, before driving somewhere to get amazing Chinese food.

It. Was. Bliss. Which is why we’ve been keeping our eyes on the one in Manteca wayyy before it opened. It was due to open in early 2021, but got delayed because, well, you know.

And then, TGWL in Manteca ran a sale. For the weekend before L starts school! We jumped at the chance for one last hurrah before school started.

First, the good news: the water park is every bit as magical and fun as I remembered. You gotta go early to grab chairs, but once you’ve got towels & chairs, you’re basically SET for the day. You have a place for all your stuff: wet clothes, dry clothes, snacks, food, tablets, books, water bottles….. We left our tablets at the chairs when no one is around, it all seemed pretty safe.

Covid notwithstanding, the water park itself is extremely safe. There are literally lifeguards standing every 3-6 feet apart and they’re super vigilant. L got in trouble at the wave pool and a lifeguard was right on it. When we floated around the lazy river I think I counted 5-6 different lifeguards that we floated by. There's a staff member guardian EVERY waterslide, both where you enter, and where you exit. The chance of your child being left to wonder, or fall into a pool by accident is very very low.

Re: Covid. With the delta variant, I realized that we were taking a risk since we couldn’t wear masks while swimming/floating. That said, TGWL had fans running the whole time, plus there’s a [loud] ventilation system in place since they keep it so warm (steady 82+ degrees). Also, the waterpark itself is ginormous so easy to space out. There were people, but I wouldn’t say it was crowded. That said, your risk tolerance may vary, and please use your own discretion as to when you might be comfortable visiting (or not).

More good news: lots of stuff for kids to do! Besides the built-in entertainment: waterpark, Magi-Quest, mini-golf, arcade, build-a-bear, mining, bowling; there are also kids-centric activities throughout the day. There are craft times, pre-recorded woodland story times (3 times a day), nightly dance parties, and nightly story times read by a person. In short, lots to do, easy to keep the kids entertained.

Less good news: 1. Due to staffing shortages, dining options in the resort are limited. There may be 2 spots for lunch, and maybe 3 for dinner. If you’d like to have dinner at the “nice” restaurant, Barnwood, definitely make a reservation as they don’t take walk-ins. 2. Again, staffing shortages, there’s no daily housekeeping right now. We didn’t mind since we had a short visit, plus, well, Covid. But if that’s something you care about, maybe wait a bit.

Now for the really bad news: Check-in at the hotel is an absolute nightmare. We got there shortly after 2:00 pm, and literally waited in line for ~90 minutes. After the initial hour someone did come through the line and issued wristbands to family members who are NOT in-line so they could hit up the waterpark first, but yeah, be ready for a wait. This didn’t happen to us, but I heard from several folks that even though they checked-in at 4:00pm, they weren’t able to get into their rooms until 6:00pm, or 8:00 pm (again, those staffing shortages). Just be aware that it could be a bit of a wait.

With all that said, here are my top Tips and Tricks for a great time at The Great Wolf Lodge!

1. Wear your swimsuit to the lodge so everyone in your family can go to the waterpark while 1 person waits in line to check-in (they have towels and life vests at the waterpark, so no need to bring those)

2. Bring a waterproof phone case (the ones for sale at the shop is $30)

3. Bring a million 3M hooks - there’s a general lack of hooks to hang up wet swimsuits + towels

4. Bring water bottles to refill - there are ice water available at the bar

5. You’re not supposed to bring food food into the waterpark, but snacks seemed to be okay (?). I brought some seaweed snacks and chips.

6. Bring a tablet/book for “down time.” Kids will initially go crazy over water slides, but might need a little down time in-between.

7. It is really loud inside the waterpark. If you/your kids are noise sensitive, bring earplugs or headphones

8. There’s a Costco right next door to the Great Wolf Lodge - good place to stock up on snacks & drinks.

9. You do get a fridge in the room, and there’s a shared microwave in the common area. Good for keeping/heating up leftovers

10. Breakfast is basically Dunkin’ Donuts (there’s also a Starbucks across the street), but get there early or it could be a long line

11. For dinner at Barnwood, make a reservation

12. Mask wearing is not really enforced inside the lodge, so, take that how you will. We wore masks (so did kids) inside the hotel/play area, except for the actual waterpark. The waterpark itself is huge and [I think] well-ventilated, and we felt okay going maskless.

13. If your little ones get cold (or annoyed with wet clothes) like mine do, bring a DRY change of clothes into the waterpark. There are places to shower, and they can do a quick rinse-off and throw on dry clothes. Or, just towel off and put on dry clothes.

14, Bring your cellphone (inside those waterproof cases that I mentioned above) and take a million pictures! When you get home, dump those photos into Google Photos album and it’ll print a photo book, automagically! We keep several photo books on our shelf and they are a great reminder that we did fun things (even in the middle of a pandemic)!

What are your Labor Day plans? Share with us in the comments.

https://www.greatwolf.com/northern-california

08/25/2021

***Be Kind, Decline (the extra stuff)***

As a person who came of age in the 90's, I have fond memories of visiting Blockbuster Video on Friday nights, strolling through the isles and finding just the right movie.

This was back in the day when we still had videotapes. Yes, TAPES, the ones with a ribbon (?) in the middle. On the cover of the case, there would be a little note, “Be Kind, Rewind” asking the viewer to rewind the videotapes when they’re done with the movie.

“Be Kind, Rewind” is something I still say sometimes, even though everything is digital now (and we just pushed the “back” button on the remote) 😆

In the last two weeks, many of us sent our kids back to in-person schools. Our unvaccinated, mask-wearing, hand-sanitizer pumping kids. Our lives have been in a state of transition: getting the kids ready, starting new routines, and, for the kids that have been back for a few weeks - settling into a “new normal.”

I was thinking about the transition and how challenging it was going to be, for both kids AND parents:

*Kid starting Kindergarten? That’s a tough year. The whole “getting-up-early-AND-packing-a-lunch” thing - not fun. Also, why are there SO MANY early dismissal days (in California)??

*Kid moved to a new school during Covid? That’s rough too. New commutes (for parents) and a whole new set of random school closure dates, plus different early dismissal dates. Lots to figure out and get used to.

*Kids started going to in-person school after not seeing anyone for 18 months? Ooof. I can’t imagine how surreal it must be for the kids, first told to STAY FAR AWAY from everyone, to now being shoved into a [possibly] crowded classroom, wearing masks for the entire day. For the record, I am pro-masks in classrooms, still, it’s a lot to ask of the kids when we ourselves don’t really want to wear a mask all day. My husband returned to the office for 2 days, then gave up going in when the County mask mandate returned.

*Delta variant sending your anxiety levels up into the stratosphere? Yep!

So..... amongst the transition, anxiety, and challenges, what’s a parent to do???

***Be Kind, Decline ***(the extra stuff).

Decline! Decline all the things in your life that don’t matter right now, and spend this time with yourself, your children, your spouse, and maybe your bestie(s), and that’s it ✋

Decline meetings you don’t physically need to attend. Watch/listen to the all hands video later when you’re on a walk.

Decline calendar invites to Zoom happy hours, or otherwise non-job-related events. Trust me, there’ll be another one soon - no one is going back to the office just yet.

Decline requests to become a room parent, PTA coordinator, or whatever thing the school asked you to do. Yes, you CAN do it, but you don’t need to. By the way, you can change your mind later and join when things are less…. pandemic-y.

Decline lunches with people that you don’t care about (but felt some sort of obligation to fulfill). You can see them later, or never.

Decline invitations to birthday parties (or any parties) of kids you barely know, or other kids’ parents who are just being nice. No need to make an appearance. Send a lovely note and say, “thank you for thinking of us, we’re sorry to miss this time around and wish you a very happy birthday!”

Decline anything and everything that’s not about you, your kids, school, and your time together.

Now that you have all this extra time, here are some things to actually DO:

*Walk your kids to school and/or pick up your kids from school. Take a moment to talk about their days: what’s going well, what’s weird/different? What’s something that’s challenging? Did they make new friends? What do they do at recess? What’s the new teacher like? What’s something your kid is excited about? What’s something he/she can use help with? Even if you have a kindergartner, they’re able to express their likes/dislikes, and if you have the time, there’s always something you can talk about

**Talk about how you’re feeling, and ask your kids how they’re feeling. I think it’s okay to share that you’re worried about stuff; and maybe they’re worried about the same stuff, or different stuff. And maybe you can each/both come up with some coping mechanisms to help each other: “let’s go for a walk everyday at 4:00 pm!”

***Reminder that tantrums are when the feelings are too big for your kids to handle, and they don’t know how to deal with it. Be there for them, show that you’ve got your back (even if you can’t help in the moment). Feel like crying? Sadness is a normal human emotion, and it’s okay to cry!

****Remember that all transitions are hard. They are as hard (or possibly harder) on you than your kids. Give yourself grace: take a break, go for a walk, sit and drink some tea/coffee/wine, listen to music, or binge Ted Lasso. Just like all things, this period will pass and your life will be back to its normal pace in a couple of 3 weeks.

*****Finally, take pictures! Give lots of hugs, kisses, and say all your “I love yours.” Today I told my little one, “I’m SO proud of you!” and really meant it. He’s been through a lot in the past 2 years: his daycare closed, he had no school for a while, then he started a new daycare, and now a new new school. And so far, he’s handled it all in stride. I am SO proud.

As for me, I’m going to take my own advice and SLOW DOWN. Besides my usual workout routine, I’ve made no social plans (and this ME, who sees SIX friends a week!) and no work plans. I’m chauffeuring my kids around, figuring out a new routine, chatting in the car about whatever is happening, packing snacks (and lunch once a week), and noting all the holidays on calendar, and, and, and. It’s a strange turn for me, going from working 100% to….. Not. But I’m relishing in this time. It’s literally TWO WEEKS of my life, and I know I won’t regret having spent it with my kids (and occasionally took a nap, too)😴

So this week, do yourself the favor and DECLINE anything that does not matter. You can get back to it later, I promise.

What things are you letting go of? Share with us in the comments.