Monster Longe

Monster Longe Welcome to a world of results.

Your iron status is pretty bad.Not only don’t you own a firearm to protect you and your family in the event that the zom...
12/01/2025

Your iron status is pretty bad.

Not only don’t you own a firearm to protect you and your family in the event that the zombie apocalypse finally happens and society descends into chaos with s**t becoming more “every man for himself” than things already are but your intake of the essential mineral is also low because you’re not consuming enough or getting it from the right sources to meet the recommended daily amount.

Neither of those things are good but luckily, they both have an easy solution!

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A Monster Mini (as in a mini article, not a mini other thing, you perv).

Are you suffering from low energy?Are you also experiencing acne, diarrhea, hair loss, and changes in your cognitive and...
11/28/2025

Are you suffering from low energy?

Are you also experiencing acne, diarrhea, hair loss, and changes in your cognitive and psychological function, such as depressed mood? Sure, you experience a combination of those things all the time but is it more than the usual? Are those symptoms also accompanied by reduced appetite and the loss of smell and taste?

I’m certainly not a doctor but since I might as well be one because I know how to use WebMD, what it sounds like in my internet-qualified medical opinion is that you’re not getting enough zinc in your diet!

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A Monster Mini (as in a mini article, not a mini other thing, you perv).

When people think of a monster walking about, they most likely conjure up images of Godzilla making its way through a de...
11/21/2025

When people think of a monster walking about, they most likely conjure up images of Godzilla making its way through a densely populated city and wreaking havoc all about. That’s a terrifying sight.

Although named “monster walks”, the exercise doesn’t evoke the same imagery. The wide, awkward gait that’s used to perform the movement is anything but one that inspires terror. Instead of people running for their lives every time they see you coming by as you perform the monster walk, they’ll probably bust out laughing at you because of how silly it looks.

…

That is, until a couple of months go by and they notice that you have bigger and firmer glutes from adding the exercise as a complement to your squats, lunges, deadlifts, hip thrusts, and other conventional exercises performed with barbells, dumbbells, machines, cables, and other equipment that allow for greater and greater overload to challenge the body and elicit the effects of hypertrophy.

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Maybe people will stop making fun of you in the gym now…maybe not.

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘥𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘰𝘥𝘢?!?!, you ask incredulously.⁣⁣⁣Good question!After all, the caffeine a...
11/11/2025

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘥𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘰𝘥𝘢?!?!, you ask incredulously.⁣⁣⁣

Good question!

After all, the caffeine and sugar can provide a quick pick me up when your energy levels are low, with the former also boosting concentration and alertness. Together, those two ingredients can help increase performance when you’re tired or engaging in certain tasks. And as if it needed to be said, soda is fu***ng delicious.

Soda = 🤤

But here's the thing…

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Nutrition food facts for thought.

When you introduce instability to an exercise — such as a push-up by placing the hands or feet on a mobile, not fixed, s...
10/23/2025

When you introduce instability to an exercise — such as a push-up by placing the hands or feet on a mobile, not fixed, surface — the muscles have to work harder to execute the movement. That’s what suspension training is, and suspension trainers are the means by which you can leverage gravity and your body weight to improve strength, balance, flexibility, and coordination.

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Become equipped with knowledge about gym equipment.

One of three muscles comprising the gluteal muscle group, the gluteus medius is a thick, fan-shaped muscle that lies on ...
10/20/2025

One of three muscles comprising the gluteal muscle group, the gluteus medius is a thick, fan-shaped muscle that lies on the lateral side of the buttocks between the much larger gluteus maximus and much smaller gluteus minimus. The muscle is responsible for hip abduction and its development is not only important for hip stability but also the appearance of a fuller and rounder backside. Toward that end, studies have found the simple clamshell exercise to be one of the best exercises for recruiting the gluteus medius.

So how simple are clamshells?

Find out for yourself!

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Maybe people will stop making fun of you in the gym now…maybe not.

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘨𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘤?!?!, you ask incredulously.⁣⁣⁣Good question!Garlic = 🤮⁣⁣⁣But here’s the t...
10/06/2025

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘨𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘤?!?!, you ask incredulously.⁣⁣⁣

Good question!

Garlic = 🤮⁣⁣⁣

But here’s the thing…

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Nutrition food facts for thought.

Much like stationary and walking lunges, reverse lunges build lower body strength and muscle while developing stability ...
09/26/2025

Much like stationary and walking lunges, reverse lunges build lower body strength and muscle while developing stability and balance from the unilateral nature of the exercise, as standing upright with the majority of the load on one leg at a time makes the body less stable and requires more engagement of the core and spine to provide support.

Reverse lunges share those similarities with conventional stationary and walking lunges but there are a few differences. The most obvious is that the exercise is performed by stepping backward, which is why the movement is not only known as a reverse lunge but also as a backward lunge.

Yeah, that’s why it’s called that.

I know, whodathunk that was the reason behind the movement’s name!

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Maybe people will stop making fun of you in the gym now…maybe not.

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘶𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘶𝘵 𝘴𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘴𝘩?!?!, you ask incredulously.⁣⁣⁣Good question!Butternut squash = ...
09/13/2025

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘶𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘶𝘵 𝘴𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘴𝘩?!?!, you ask incredulously.⁣⁣⁣

Good question!

Butternut squash = 🤮⁣⁣⁣

But here’s the thing…

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Nutrition food facts for thought.

Coming to grips with your own mortality is tough. It just hits you that some day you’re going to die and will eventually...
08/01/2025

Coming to grips with your own mortality is tough. It just hits you that some day you’re going to die and will eventually be forgotten.

The farmer’s carry, also known as a farmer’s walk, can’t exactly help with that problem but it can help with a different grip issue!

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Maybe people will stop making fun of you in the gym now…maybe not.

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘲𝘶𝘪𝘯𝘰𝘢?!?!, you ask incredulously.⁣⁣⁣Good question!After all, quinoa is actually...
07/28/2025

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘲𝘶𝘪𝘯𝘰𝘢?!?!, you ask incredulously.⁣⁣⁣

Good question!

After all, quinoa is actually a seed from the same family as beets, Swiss chard, and spinach, all of which are yucky in their own right.

Quinoa = 🤮⁣⁣⁣

But here's the thing…

Read Now

Nutrition food facts for thought.

Are you a dude? A dude with whom a prepubescent girl has more chest development than?Well, I’m here to tell you that a s...
07/22/2025

Are you a dude? A dude with whom a prepubescent girl has more chest development than?

Well, I’m here to tell you that a small chest doesn’t make you any less of a woman, buddy. These are progressive times we’re living in. Self-love and body acceptance, mo********er!

Buuuuuuttttt if you’re not quite ready to take your seat at the head of the Itty Bitty T***y Committee, this handy-dandy guide will show you how to build chest muscles.

Now, let’s go ahead and slap some boobage on ya!

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Totally unsolicited training advice.

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