Paul Ziller Psychotherapy

Individuals, couples, and relationships of all kinds find greater awareness of, balance with, and connection to self, others, and resources.

Operating as usual


These Sensitive documentaries are a great way to witness and explore #HSP (Highly Sentive Person) traits, self-discoveries, and skills. If you find this world can seem too much at times for you (through senses including sight, sound, touch, or realms including relationship, workplace, media), I encourage you to give one of these a try...

Looking for films to watch this weekend? ✨ Watch the entire Sensitive film collection ✨ FREE ✨ on Tubi❗️This includes: 🎥‘Sensitive and in Love’ (romance/drama);
Elaine Aron’s latest documentary on HSPs in relationships 🎥‘Sensitive Lovers: a deeper look into their relationships’;
and the original documentary 🎥 'Sensitive: The Untold Story' featuring Alanis Morissette❗️

Photos from Paul Ziller Psychotherapy's post 02/28/2021

#CharlieMackesy's illustrative and written voice is certainly trending. You've no doubt seen one of these...and there is good reason why. It elicits our curious inner child, and as a baseline invites us to be gentle on ourselves. Many of his messages speak to the therapeutic process and relationship itself. So, I say, COME, take part in "A School of Unlearning"...because SO much of what we take in, and how we make meaning of it we may discover doesn't serve us, or even harms us. And, we have an opportunity to untangle, uncouple, unlearn it.

#TheBoyTheMoleTheFoxAndTheHorse #SchoolOfUnlearning #HarperOne

Timeline Photos 12/28/2020

During COVID, so much of the work has been about the anxiety generated by all of our collective uncertainty, and our inability to "arrive" at standard or expected milestones. Connecting to internal and external resources that help us move through it, and provide some sense of nourishment or of a nuanced movement in the stuck places has been essential. Toko-pa Turner shares a poetic perspective on both the resiliency in the "withstanding," and the potential meaning-making in the building out of our capacity to be with the uncertainty.

While others are anxious to see you arrive, I praise your vast withstanding of the uncertainty from which all meaning is born.” - Toko-pa Turner (

Photos from Daniell Koepke - Internal Acceptance Movement - I AM's post 11/25/2020

This is a very comprehensive making-space-for our basic feeling of anger. So often folks aren’t ok with their anger, or how it manifests. It can often arise around family time throughout the holidays. Addressing that shame, and building somatic awareness around the ways it arises in us is part of the process of finding our way through it.


On this World Mental Health Day, this really resonated...the way it summons our inner child, and perhaps some awareness around our own path or choices. What do we uphold, or have we set as our “North Star”? In what ways do we prioritize touching into, or moving towards our essential self, or transcending the projections of others, or external expectations? A powerful invitation to dig deeper around this.

#CathyThorne #EveryDayPeopleCartoons #WorldMentalHealthDay #WorldMentalHealthDay2020

On this World Mental Health Day, this really resonated...the way it summons our inner child, and perhaps some awareness around our own path or choices. What do we uphold, or have we set as our “North Star”? In what ways do we prioritize touching into, or moving towards our essential self, or transcending the projections of others, or external expectations? A powerful invitation to dig deeper around this.

#CathyThorne #EveryDayPeopleCartoons #WorldMentalHealthDay #WorldMentalHealthDay2020

The Social Dilemma | Netflix Official Site 09/10/2020

The Social Dilemma | Netflix Official Site

This new-ish Netflix docu does a pretty comprehensive job of examining the human harm of social networking. A helpful lens to notice our own use, and begin to address any compulsive or addictive patterns that may not be serving us. Therapy can help us access and build out alternate resources. / “We’re training and conditioning a whole new generation of people that when we are uncomfortable, or lonely, or uncertain, or afraid, we have a digital pacifier for ourselves that is kind of atrophying our own ability to deal with that.” - Tristan Harris

The Social Dilemma | Netflix Official Site This documentary-drama hybrid explores the dangerous human impact of social networking, with tech experts sounding the alarm on their own creations.


Welcome to the “Green Room”!

I’m now holding outdoor, masked/distanced sessions, as daily conditions and AQI allow.

Grateful to sit in-person again, and share space with (opt-in only) clients, and for the grounding, regulating, and holding of the natural setting (bird chirps 🐦 included) in this tucked away park setting.

The hedge 🌳 🌳 🌳 here provides a great wind and sound barrier as well.

#resources #mentalhealth #healing #sensitive #therapy #therapist #sfbayarea #support #wellness #sanfrancisco #individuals #talk #psychology #mft #lmft #paulziller #psychotherapy #socialdistancing #shelterinplace #COVID #park #outdoors #outside #somaticexperiencing #nature #regulating #grounding #sessions #schedule #inperson

[05/25/20]   As part of the #HowAreYouReallyChallenge by the Mental Health Coalition, #WhoopiGolberg answers the question, "How are you, really?"

Do you feel you can share that with a friend, loved one, or therapist? Not the socially polite or safe answer, but the real answer?

I hope you have or can access that support, and have space for how you are, really.

#mhc 04/24/2020

Sensitive Lovers

The new HSP documentary is out...the second in the series. (Just $10 to view online.) "SENSITIVE LOVERS: A DEEPER LOOK INTO THEIR RELATIONSHIPS" features bestselling author-psychologist Dr. Elaine Aron ("The Highly Sensitive Person") and the eminent scientist of love and relationships, Dr. Arthur Aron ("36 Questions").

Based on their life long research of close relationships and the trait of high sensitivity, they explain how negative childhood experiences and buried traumas affect our adult relationships, break down science behind most critical scenes of Sensitive and in Love and provide suggestions for highly sensitive people and those close to them for wiser, more skillful and fulfilling relationships.

#HSP #HighlySensitive #DrElaineAron #SensitiveLovers #Relationships #Couples #DrArthurAron SENSITIVE LOVERS: A DEEPER LOOK INTO THEIR RELATIONSHIPS is a one-hour documentary that features bestselling author-psychologist Dr. Elaine Aron (The Highly Sensitive Person) and the eminent scientist of love and relationships, Dr. Arthur Aron (36 Questions). Based on their life long research of clo...


Sesame Street: How to Self Hug with Abby Cadabby | #CaringForEachOther

Abby Cadabby of Sesame Street has a special message and reminder for your INNER CHILD. That's right...this can serve not just current children.

In the spirit of the self compassion and self care work I do, she's encouraging a SELF HUG. Useful in a moment of distractedness, overwhelm, or helplessness.

Take a second now…give it a try. Really focus in on the sensations, and notice YOU showing up for yourself. How is that for you?

Be well. And keep on self-hugging!

#InnerChild #SesameStreet #AbbyCadabby #SelfHug #SelfCompassion #SelfCare #COVID #Quarantine #ShelterInPlace

Whether you're having big feelings, little feelings, or anything in between, you can just give yourself a hug! Learn how you can self-hug with Abby Cadabby. ...


Lisa Olivera Therapy, LMFT #106546 provides a beautiful reminder and invitation for us to be gentle on ourselves in this time of collective trauma and threat. You are doing the best you can.

#SelfCompassion 04/02/2020

Coronavirus Anxiety: Coping with Stress, Fear & Uncertainty

How are these challenging times impacting you, and how have you been taking care of yourself?

It's presenting a very clear invitation to us to really adapt and rally our resources, and the importance of the need for that prioritization and mindfulness has perhaps never been clearer or greater.

There are many lists of suggestions floating around for how to cope. This one highlights some of the most important and largely intuitive points:

• Focus on the things you CAN control.
• Stay connected.
• Take cafe of your holistic self!

I'm sending you energetic support in finding your way through this in whatever way you can, or need to. If you find that you're isolating or isolated, be really curious about any connection that you might be able to reach out for, that could be supportive to you in any way. Fears about COVID-19 can take an emotional toll, especially if you're already living with an anxiety disorder. But you're not powerless. These tips can help you get through this stressful time.


Try a Video Appointment with Telehealth by SimplePractice

I am currently offering online Telehealth therapy sessions, via video and/or phone. This allows you to continue your therapy work from your home, while honoring the shelter-in-place and social distancing mandates.

Reach out for a FREE 20-minute consultation. (Available to Californians.)

Our video sessions powered by SimplePractice client portal.

#Telehealth #VideoTherapy #Therapy #resources #boundaries #mentalhealth #healing #shame #sensitive #awareness #therapy #therapist #sfbayarea #support #wellness #sanfrancisco #individuals #couples #talk #psychology #mft #lmft #paulziller #psychotherapy #socialdistancing #shelterinplace #OnlineTherapy #SimplePractice #Teletherapy

Click to download a free guide to Telehealth for clients: Contact your wellness provider to learn more and see if ...


Bodyposipanda offers some supportive and permissive messaging around this current time of major change to our lives and routines, and the awarenesses we may have around how our bodies or sense of self are being impacting. Be especially curious about your self talk right now, and if/how it’s serving you, or harming you.

Stay connected, and reach out to others when you need contact or aid in these isolating times.

#bodypositive #bodyacceptance #intuitiveeating #selftalk #permission #bodyposipanda #resources #boundaries #inspiration #quotes #mentalhealth #healing #shame #sensitive #awareness #therapy #therapist #sfbayarea #support #wellness #sanfrancisco #individuals #couples #talk #psychology #mft #lmft #paulziller #psychotherapy #socialdistancing, #routine #body #isolation #snacks

Hey internet, how about we DON'T make people feel sh*tty about their body changing when weight fluctuations are an entirely natural reaction to our lives being a little bit different right now 🙃 it's okay if your body gets softer in the stillness. It's okay if perfect intuitive eating isn't your number one priority right now. It's okay if all the people sharing fatphobic memes & at-home-weight-loss-boot-camps are making you want to scream into the abyss. We will not blame our bodies for changing during this time. I repeat: WE WILL NOT BLAME OUR BODIES FOR CHANGING DURING THIS TIME. They're doing the best they can. 💜💙💚🌈🌞

[Image description: a series of text posts with repeated phrases that read: 1. "It's okay to gain weight while social distancing". 2. "It's okay if your body changes because your routine has". 3. "You do not need to use this time to lose weight". 4. "You do not need to make up for your isolation snacks"] #bodypositive #bodyacceptance #edrecovery #intuitiveeating #allbodiesaregoodbodies


Jack Kornfield

#JackKornfield offers some potent strategies in responding to our repeating negative thoughts. In part, a self compassionate response to ourselves of: “Thank you for trying to protect me, but I’m OK now.” That acknowledges why this defense is in place, and how it perhaps served us in the past in some way.

...and replacement self talk like: “May I be safe and protected.” or “I will live with trust and kindness.” can offer some alternative self soothing and holding.

We can start to loosen the grip of these unhealthy thought patterns with such substitution, repetition and self compassion.

#Anxiety #Difficult #Negative #Thoughts #Strategies #Therapy #SelfCompassion #Safety

When a repeated negative thought arises, one of worry and anxiety, of self-criticism or depression, first study it. When does it arise? How often? What is its tone of voice? Does it appear as words or have images too? What story does it want you to believe? How painful is it to hear it over and over? Now that you see it clearly, you can say to the thought, “Thank you for trying to protect me, but I’m OK now.”
Then choose a suitable replacement such as:
“I am a compassionate person, I care for people.”
“I care for myself.”
“May I be safe and protected.”
“I will live with a peaceful heart.”
“A day at a time.”
“I will live with trust and kindness.”
We can remove unhealthy thought patterns such as self-judgment, worry and anxiety by thought substitution. What is required is the selection of a helpful substitute and repeated practice. Repetition is key. Repetition, compassion, and the belief that the painful cycles of thought can be transformed all have a part in developing new patterns of thought.


This highlights how our cognitive process can be limited, or not have all the data it needs to allow us to settle on something. Therefore, the clarity we can find in our somatic awareness and practice may be more powerful to address ambivalence, or a stuck place.

Einstein's story proved this as well. All the thinking in his lab didn't provide his discovery to crack the laws of physics. But the regulated state of being on his beloved sailboat did.

If you find yourself cycling on a hard decision, take some time to notice what's arising in your bodily sensations. Where do you most notice that? And, can you be with it for a time, without trying to actively move it away? What do you notice as you give it your awareness and presence?

This practice comes from #SomaticExperiencing, and is invaluable for downregulation, and moving through states, including anxiety, numbness, etc.

#quotes #mentalhealth #healing #shame #sensitive #awareness #therapy #therapist #sfbayarea #support #wellness #sanfrancisco #individuals #couples #talk #psychology #mft #lmft #paulziller #psychotherapy #somatic

Wake up. Sit. Breathe. Connect to the quiet within and listen for the answers you seek.
Thinking is often what gets us into pain, confusion, and anxiety, so trying to use the mind for answers, without checking in with your heart, will often not produce the results you’re looking for.
What happens is you get caught in a loop of “thinking about thinking” and your life’s answers are elusive.
Always bring your heart along for the answers you’re looking for beautiful ones. ~xoxo Michelle & Barb



These offer some great resources, normalizing perspectives, encouragement of self permission, and more throughout these often over-stimulating, paradoxical times.

#DaniellKoepke / Daniell Koepke - Internal Acceptance Movement - I AM

#holidays #resources #boundaries #family #challenges #inspiration #quotes #mentalhealth #healing #shame #sensitive #awareness #therapy #therapist #sfbayarea #support #wellness #sanfrancisco #individuals #couples #talk #psychology #mft #lmft #paulziller #psychotherapy

I hope these reminders can help in the coming weeks 💌
You’re seen. You’re heard. Your feelings are valid. And you’re enough. There’s no right or wrong - just what works for you and allows you to honor yourself and your needs.
For me, that means giving myself permission to be sad and not okay because I’m struggling and in pain. It means taking time to also be grateful for the things I do have that bring me joy and make my life meaningful. It means shifting my expectations and accepting my family for who they are, and accepting where I’m at with my health. It means slowing down, turning down plans I don’t want to participate in, and giving myself permission to be “unproductive”. And also pushing myself out of isolation and into connection. But more than anything, it means staying present. Not predicting the course of my life based on this month or today. And staying curious about what might be coming. Not unrealistically hopeful. Just curious. And compassionate.
Which of these reminders resonated most with you? Or what do you need to practice over the holidays or remind yourself of for self care?
Sending a lot of love ✨
#daniellkoepke 12/17/2019

For Highly Sensitive People, the Holidays Can Be Too Much

Do you lose yourself in the expectations and over-stimulation of the holidays? Do you have permission to lean into your needs and boundaries at this time, in the face of so many others’?

Here are some great tips for Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) on how to take care of yourself through these holidays. Although they are applicable to many.

What depletes you, and what really brings you joy? Get really curious, and pay attention to those. Notice when you override them, or when you listen to them.

#hsp #highlysensitivepeople #DrElaineAron #holidays #overstimulation #needs #boundaries #selfcare #mentalhealth #healing #sensitive #awareness #therapy #therapist #sfbayarea #support #wellness #sanfrancisco #individuals #couples #talk #psychology #mft #lmft #paulziller #psychotherapy This is the season where you must cradle and shelter the spirit of what your heart asks of you.




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