Parents Supporting Parents

01/28/2026

Check out this BFree Wellness Inc workshop.

01/28/2026

01/26/2026

*ZOOM ONLY THIS WEEK**

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Substance use impacts the whole family. While the loved ones of the individual struggling may not suffer from addiction themselves they are an important part of the recovery of the individual who struggles. Come and get the education and support you need from others who have walked in your shoes. We hope you can join us!

Join us Monday, 1/26 for our Weekly Support Meeting

01/17/2026

If you haven't experienced the utter helplessness of losing your child bit by bit, you're lucky, but if you have...

Dear Mom, (Dad and Family), It's Not Your Fault.

As a drug and alcohol counselor, it’s been an honor to work closely with individuals who struggle with addiction. It's immensely gratifying to see people who have given up on life recover hope and make life-saving changes in a short time. As the addicted person becomes well, it’s essential to look at the family history. Returning to a safe, supportive environment is crucial when recovering from addiction.

Because addiction is a family disease, everyone needs to make changes. To facilitate this, family members attend rehab weekly to participate in educational family programs. The faces change, but their stories are similar. Some are spouses and siblings. A few are Dads. But for the most part, the common thread in families struggling with addiction is Mom.

Mom, you made the calls to rehab.

Mom, you cleaned up the mess.

Mom, you paid the bills.

Mom, you kept the secrets.

Mom, you protected them.

Mom, you put your life on hold.

Mom, you did your best. Now it’s time to stop beating yourself up.

Dear Mom, it's not your fault.

In group therapy, one Mom gave voice to her pain. Her son’s addiction had taken a significant toll on her. She was exhausted and had tried everything she could think of to put her son back together. But no matter how hard this Mom tried, she couldn’t get him clean and sober. When her son was small, Mom said she could fix his scraped knee with a kiss and a Band-Aid. Mom helped her son with his homework, fed his hungry stomach, and soothed his feverish brow. Mom changed his diaper and wiped his runny nose. But her child's addiction was beyond her control. Mom threw up her hands in the group and cried. “I failed my son.” There was a moment of silence before heads began to nod. Mothers around the room agreed. Logical or not, these women felt like they had failed as Moms.

It doesn’t matter who Mom is; she will struggle with guilt. Mom wonders, was her child’s addiction her fault?

Mom, you ask;

What did I do wrong?

Didn’t I do enough?

Did I do too much?

The answer is simple.

Dear Mom, it's not your fault.

When your child struggles with addiction, your head and heart play tug-of-war. What you’re seeing and what you’re hearing doesn’t add up. You want to believe your child, but your instincts tell you differently. Worse yet, when you confront your child, they get angry and shut you out of their life. To stay close, you give in to their demands and say yes when no is the correct answer.

After a time, you realize that helping them isn’t helpful, and the guilt you felt at not being able to fix your child led you to do too much for them. Which, in turn, only enabled their addiction.

Mom, you did the best you could, considering you didn’t have all the facts. When someone struggles with addiction, they don’t tell you the truth. They say what you want to hear. You can’t make informative choices when you don't know the whole story.

Dear Mom, it's not your fault.

It’s natural to want to trust your child. Your nature is to nurture and take care of them. If only love could fix this. But it cannot. To help your child, you will require a support system and firm boundaries.

At first, setting healthy boundaries will feel cruel and unloving. Stay the course; boundaries help your child experience the consequences of their actions, increasing the likelihood that they will choose recovery. However, don’t expect a thank you for doing the right thing. Most who struggle with addiction will not appreciate you saying no. They may even become verbally abusive and revert to emotional extortion.

You may hear things like, You're a terrible Mom. An uncaring Mom. A selfish Mom. As you hold your boundaries, their behavior may escalate. Substance abusers act up because it works. However, rewarding manipulative behavior is never a good idea. Instead, talk with your support circle. You will feel guilty. You will second-guess yourself. Your head will tell you, you’re the worst Mom ever. But you’re absolutely not. You’re a loving Mom doing a hard thing–the right thing.

Dear Mom, it's not your fault.

Please know you didn’t cause their illness. You can’t cure it, and you can’t control it. But you can influence the outcome. Someone has to make the hard choices. Don’t wait for the impaired thinker to do it. Lead by example. If they refuse help, start with you. Be prepared to attend meetings and, most importantly, reach out for support. There is hope. Addiction is a treatable illness, and statistics show that when families are educated and in recovery, their addicted loved ones have a greater chance of succeeding.

Lorelie Rozzano
www.jaggedlittleedges.com

01/11/2026

I didn't write the words below, but they're precisely why I wrote Jagged Little Lies... because families need support, too.

I am not an addict.
But try and love one, and then see if you can look me square in the eyes and tell me that you didn’t get addicted to trying to fix them and help them.
If you’re lucky, they recover. If you’re really lucky, you recover, too.
Loving a drug addict can and will consume your every thought. Watching their physical deterioration and emotional detachment to everything will make you the most tired insomniac alive.
You will beg and plead with them that you “just want them back.” If you watch the person you love disappear right in front of your eyes long enough, you will start to dissolve too.
Those not directly affected won’t be able to understand why you are so focused on your loved one’s well-being.
Don’t become angry with these people. They do not understand. They are lucky to not understand. You’ll catch yourself wishing that you didn’t understand, either.
“What if you had to wake up every day and wonder if today was the day your family member was going to die?” will become a popular, not-so-rhetorical question.
Drug addiction has the largest ripple effect that I have ever witnessed firsthand. It causes parents to outlive their children. It causes jail time and homelessness. It causes parents to leave their children. It causes an endless cycle of drug abuse and suicides. It causes sisters to mourn their siblings. It causes nieces and nephews to never meet their aunts and uncles. It tears families apart. It causes an absence before the exit. It becomes a cycle that repeats itself with each generation.
You will see your loved one walking and talking, but the truth is, you will lose them far before they actually succumb to their demons; which, if they don’t find recovery, is inevitable.
Drug addiction causes families to come to fear a ringing phone or a knock on the door.
It causes vague obituaries. I read the papers and I follow the news; and it is scary. “Died suddenly” has officially become obituary-speak for “another young person found dead from a drug overdose.”
Drug addiction causes bedrooms and social media sites to become memorials. It causes the “yesterdays” to outnumber the “tomorrows.” It causes things to break; like the law, trust and homes. Drug addiction causes statistics to rise and knees to fall, as praying seems like the only thing left to do sometimes.
People have a way of pigeonholing those who suffer from addiction. They don’t understand that addiction is an illness. Addicts have families and aspirations.
You will learn that drug addiction doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t care if the addict came from a loving home or a broken family. Drug addiction doesn’t care if you are religious. Drug addiction doesn’t care if you are a straight-A student or a drop-out. Drug addiction doesn’t care what ethnicity you are. Drug addiction will show you that one decision and one lapse in judgment can alter the course of an entire life.
Drug addiction doesn’t care. Period.
But you care.
There is always a reason behind the start of addiction. It can never be dealt with or healed while in the throes of addiction. It won’t let them heal and will tell them, it can’t. But you know it can, you just can’t reach them. Even if you do reach them, it disappears just as quickly as it appeared.
You will learn to hate the drug but love the addict. You will begin to accept that you need to separate who the person once was with who they are now.
It is not the person who uses, but the addict. It is not the person, who does anything to support their habit, but the addict. It is not the person who spews obscenities at their family, but the addict. It is not the person who lies, but the addict.
And yet, sadly... it is not the addict who dies, but the person. 😞💔

Author Unknown

01/11/2026

A New Year. A New You. Because When The Most Destructive Force In Your Life Is You, It's Time To Get Help.

IF YOU STRUGGLE with addiction, as I have, you know the hopeless feeling that exists on the other side of being high. It's a place we try to avoid—reality--that space of time when you're not high or intoxicated and forced to face the consequences of your actions.

For me, reality was the morning after. I'd lie in bed and remember all the awful, embarrassing things I'd done the night before. I would replay each moment, wishing I could turn back the hands of time and undo my humiliating deeds. I sought chemical relief to cope with my painful emotions, and the process would start over again. I was baffled by my inability to use drugs and alcohol socially. I tried changing how much I used, what I used, and the places I used, but it didn't help. Each time I consumed drugs or alcohol, the consequences seemed to get worse. Despite my good intentions, I continued hurting my family and myself.

At the time, I didn't believe I was addicted. I didn't know I was sick or that my thinking had changed. Addiction is sneaky like that. It starts with subtle shifts in your perception and behavior. The following are five ways it sucks you in.

(1) Denial Sneaks In And Takes Over.

Denial is a primary roadblock to getting help. Denial makes things appear smaller than they are. Denial tells you your problems aren't that bad. Denial says I'm not hurting anyone. Denial says I can quit whenever I want to. Denial keeps you from seeing the truth. Denial is dangerous as it minimizes warning signs and perpetuates the problem. Denial allows addiction to thrive while keeping its host blindfolded.

(2) You Make Promises You Can't Keep

You promise to show up on grandma's birthday. Yes, you'll pick up the kids after school. Of course, you're coming home straight after work. But despite your good intentions, you're unable to follow through. You can't predict what might happen once you pick up. You've lost credibility, and scarier still, the more you try and control your addiction, the more it controls you.

(3) You Lie To Your Friends And Family

The lies are adding up, and you tell friends and family what they want to hear to get them off your back. You may pit parent against parent or friend against friend. You know who to call when you need money. You're good at fabricating excuses and making it seem like the problems you create aren't your fault. You blame others when cornered and manipulate your loved ones through guilt and fear tactics.

(4) Getting High Becomes A Full-Time Job

While getting high was fun in the beginning, now it's work. When you're not high, you're miserable. The euphoric release you once found in the substance has disappeared. You're not using to feel high anymore; you're using to avoid withdrawal symptoms. You need increasingly larger doses to produce the same physiological and psychological effects as your tolerance increases.

(5) Shame Is Your Second Skin

You know you're spiraling into new deep ends but don't know how to stop it. You're hurting everyone who loves you, and your best thinking is killing you. You're ashamed to look in the mirror. Shame is a toxic emotion that tells you you're unworthy, unlovable, and inadequate. Shame says give up. Shame says there's no sense in trying because you'll only fail. Shame is a liar that creates feelings of hopelessness and despair.

Putting off getting clean/sober doesn't make it easier. It just makes you sicker. When the most destructive force in your life is you, it's time to get help. While you're not responsible for your addiction, you are responsible for your recovery.

Nobody wakes up and says, "I'm going to be an addict." But there is one choice they make: how long they will stay sick. While addiction isn't a choice, recovery is.

There is hope.

Addiction is a highly treatable illness, and recovery happens when you stop making excuses and take action.

Make 2026 your year to shine. Ask for help because the only way you can fail at recovery is to quit trying.

Lorelie Rozzano
www.jaggedlittleedges.com

01/10/2026

Join us for the BFree Wellness Inc Workshop 🌿

A gentle, supportive space to explore movement, mindfulness, and connection—designed to support recovery, emotional regulation, and overall wellness.

📍 Sandwich Center for Active Living
🗓 Saturday, January 31
⏰ 10:00–11:30 AM

This workshop is open to anyone impacted by substance use.

✨ Bring your yoga mat (or borrow one of ours!)

🔗 Scan the QR code to sign up!

01/05/2026

PSP welcomes John G to our weekly support meeting Monday, Jan 5. Hope to see you there or on zoom!

“At a very young age I was introduced to alcohol. That ultimately led to drug use as I got older. Along with drug use came homelessness, stealing, cheating, etc. In 2021 I started my journey in recovery with multiple relapses and many facilities including psychiatric wards to CSS’s and rehabs. On May 1, 2023 I finally had enough digging to my rock bottom. I went to my final recovery center and till this day I am almost 3 years clean and sober.”

01/03/2026

When some people talk about addiction, they might frame it as a matter of willpower or poor choices. Dr. Ruth A. Potee argues that it is far more predictable than that and is rooted in the brain.

In her upcoming Falmouth Forum lecture titled “Physiology of Addiction: Preventable, Treatable and Largely Ignored in Medicine” at the Marine Biological Laboratory, Potee will center her talk on what she describes as the three most common risk factors for developing substance use disorder: genetics, early exposure to addictive substances and a history of trauma.

Potee said her lecture will be structured in three layers: first, an explanation of the most common risk factors for substance use disorder; second, a discussion of the most effective treatments currently available; and lastly, a look ahead at treatment access and resources in the state in 2026.

The forum will be held at the Cornelia Clapp Auditorium in Woods Hole on Friday, January 9, from 7:30 to 8:30 PM.

🔗 Tap the link in the comments for the full inside scoop ahead of Friday's talk ⬇️

12/30/2025

Dr. Potee is renowned and respected in her field. I would highly encourage attendance at this event if you have someone that struggles with substance use disorder!
https://www.capenews.net/falmouth/news/doctor-to-discuss-physiology-of-addiction-at-upcoming-falmouth-forum/article_b7def9d5-f178-4e19-94de-b42242e3a8bd.html?fbclid=IwdGRzaAO-rQ9jbGNrA76s6GV4dG4DYWVtAjExAHNydGMGYXBwX2lkDDM1MDY4NTUzMTcyOAABHvHmMtKkV7xzMnYlJiN_SNydEoND7M69y8oZwJ-gTXt51KeRbsiC6osOHCLN_aem_hM7za9CaX5l8CT9GMMotqQ&sfnsn=mo

When some people talk about addiction, they might frame it as a matter of willpower or poor choices. Dr. Ruth A. Potee argues that it is far more predictable than