Pursuit of Recovery

01/12/2026

Mom’s Monday 📝Notes
“Conflict as a Classroom”

On March 8 2002 my mother wrote:

“The challenge to conflict or criticism is not learning how to avoid it, but how to deal with it.”

In recovery, we quickly learn that conflict doesn’t go away just because we stop drinking, using, or controlling. Life still happens. People still disappoint us. We still get misunderstood, triggered, corrected, and confronted — sometimes lovingly, sometimes not.

The work of recovery is not building a life where nothing ever upsets us.
The work is learning how to stay emotionally sober when it does.

Conflict becomes a classroom in recovery.

It shows us:
• Where we are still reactive instead of responsive
• Where fear is still driving our behavior
• Where we are still trying to control outcomes instead of trusting the process

When criticism comes, the old patterns want to defend, deflect, blame, shut down, or lash out. Recovery teaches us a new pause:
• Is there truth here I can receive?
• Is there a boundary I need to hold?
• Is this mine to carry, or someone else’s to own?

Instead of asking, “How do I make this stop?”
Recovery asks, “Who am I becoming while I walk through this?”

Because peace isn’t the absence of conflict —
peace is the presence of groundness inside it.

When we learn how to deal with conflict with honesty, humility, boundaries, and self-respect, we stop being run by it. We stop outsourcing our serenity to other people’s behavior.

And that is real freedom.♥️♥️♥️

01/07/2026

Happy New Year & Thank you for Reading!

Every January, we’re invited into the same ritual. Make a plan. Set a goal. Choose a word. Create a resolution. Become better. Do more. Try harder. And while there’s nothing wrong with growth or intention, many of us quietly carry a different truth: We’re tired. Not tired of living — t

12/25/2025

Happy Birthday Jesus♥️😇
and..
Merry Christmas🎄♥️

12/24/2025

Remember…
ALL the work you have done❣️🎄🫶🏻

12/22/2025

Mom’s Monday📝 Notes..

On 2/19/01 My mother wrote:

“Walking by faith is a lifestyle—a way in which we conduct ourselves.”

In recovery, faith isn’t just something we reach for when things fall apart; it’s how we choose to live every single day. Walking by faith means showing up even when we don’t have clarity, answers, or guarantees. It’s choosing honesty over hiding, humility over control, and progress over perfection.

Recovery asks us to trust the process before we trust the outcome—to take the next right step even when fear is loud and certainty is quiet. When faith becomes a lifestyle, our actions begin to match our hope: we keep our commitments, ask for help, set boundaries, and believe that healing is happening even when we can’t yet see it.

Faith isn’t about having it all figured out—it’s about continuing to walk, one sober, intentional step at a time. 🌿

Merry Christmas❣️🎄😇🫶🏻

12/15/2025

Mom’s Monday📝 Notes on
3•19•2002 my mother wrote:

“Healing begins with realizing that our hearts are bored, discontent, anxious, empty, or restless.”

Recovery doesn’t begin when life completely falls apart — it begins when we get honest about what’s happening inside.

So many of us tried to fill that boredom, that restlessness, that quiet ache in our hearts with something: substances, relationships, approval, control, work, chaos, or caretaking others. We weren’t bad or broken — we were unaware. We didn’t yet know how to name the emptiness, so we tried to numb it.

Your mom’s words remind us that healing starts with awareness. Not judgment. Not shame. Just truth.

In recovery, we learn to pause and ask:
• What am I actually feeling right now?
• What am I trying to escape or fill?
• What does my heart need instead of what I’ve been giving it?

That realization can feel uncomfortable — even scary — because it means we can no longer blame everything outside of us. But it’s also the moment where real change becomes possible.

When we stop running from the restlessness and start listening to it, we discover that our hearts weren’t empty — they were waiting. Waiting for connection. For purpose. For peace. For God. For ourselves.

Healing begins the moment we stop numbing and start noticing. And recovery is the brave decision to stay present long enough to let the heart heal — one honest moment at a time 🤍

12/15/2025

Mom’s Monday📝 Notes on
3•19•2002 my mother wrote:

“Healing begins with realizing that our hearts are bored, discontent, anxious, empty, or restless.”

Recovery doesn’t begin when life completely falls apart — it begins when we get honest about what’s happening inside.

So many of us tried to fill that boredom, that restlessness, that quiet ache in our hearts with something: substances, relationships, approval, control, work, chaos, or caretaking others. We weren’t bad or broken — we were unaware. We didn’t yet know how to name the emptiness, so we tried to numb it.

Your mom’s words remind us that healing starts with awareness. Not judgment. Not shame. Just truth.

In recovery, we learn to pause and ask:
• What am I actually feeling right now?
• What am I trying to escape or fill?
• What does my heart need instead of what I’ve been giving it?

That realization can feel uncomfortable — even scary — because it means we can no longer blame everything outside of us. But it’s also the moment where real change becomes possible.

When we stop running from the restlessness and start listening to it, we discover that our hearts weren’t empty — they were waiting. Waiting for connection. For purpose. For peace. For God. For ourselves.

Healing begins the moment we stop numbing and start noticing. And recovery is the brave decision to stay present long enough to let the heart heal — one honest moment at a time 🤍

12/09/2025

One of the most absurd things we do to ourselves is not asking for the help we need from a friend, a family member, our Higher Power, or the appropriate resource.

We don’t have to struggle through feelings and problems alone. We can ask for help from our Higher Power and for support and encouragement from our friends.

Whether what we need is information, encouragement, a hand, a word, a hug, someone who will listen, or a ride, we can ask. We can ask people for what we need from them. We can ask God for what we need from God.

It is self-defeating to not ask for the help we need. It keeps us stuck. If we ask long and hard enough, if we direct our request to the right source, we’ll get the help we need.

There is a difference between asking someone to rescue us and asking someone in a direct manner for the help we need from him or her. We can be straightforward and let others choose whether to help us or not. If the answer is no, we can deal with that.

It is self-defeating to hint, whine, manipulate, or coerce help out of people. It is annoying to go to people as a victim and expect them to rescue us. It is healthy to ask for help when help is what we need.

“My problem is shame,” said one woman. “I wanted to ask for help in dealing with it, but I was to ashamed. Isn’t that crazy?”

We who are eager to help others can learn to allow ourselves to receive help. We can learn to make clean contracts about asking for and receiving the help we want and need.

Today, I will ask for help if I need it – from people and my Higher Power. I will not be a victim, helplessly waiting to be rescued. I will make my request for help specific, to the point, and I will leave room for the person to choose whether or not to help me. I will not be a martyr any longer by refusing to get the help I deserve in life – the help that makes life simpler. God, help me let go of my need to do everything alone. Help me use the vast Universe of resources available to me.

-Language of Letting Go

Info@pursuitofrecovery.com

12/08/2025

Mom’s Monday 📝Notes

On 12•24•24 my mother wrote:
“Courage is fear that has said its prayers.” — David Jeremiah

In recovery, we talk a lot about courage—
courage to change,
courage to heal,
courage to stay,
courage to walk away,
courage to begin again.

But what people often misunderstand is this:
Recovery doesn’t start with confidence.
It starts with fear.
Fear of losing everything.
Fear of staying the same.
Fear of facing ourselves.
Fear of feeling what we’ve been numbing for years.

And yet—this quote reminds us that courage isn’t the absence of fear.
In recovery, courage is fear that has been surrendered.
Fear that has been handed over to God.
Fear that has been prayed through instead of run from.

Every act of recovery is courageous precisely because it’s done while afraid:
• Going to your first meeting with shaking hands
• Telling the truth after years of hiding
• Making amends when your pride says “don’t”
• Cutting ties with people who won’t cut ties with substances
• Walking into treatment
• Walking back into your life
• Asking for help
• Admitting you need it
• Showing up every single day, even when you don’t know what tomorrow holds

That’s courage.
Not because you’re fearless—
but because you’re scared and still willing to try.

The spiritual heart of recovery echoes this quote:
When fear rises, we don’t white-knuckle.
We don’t pretend we’ve got it under control.
We don’t isolate or escape.
We pray.
We surrender.
We remind ourselves that God does for us what we cannot do for ourselves.

Courage, in recovery, is fear that has been prayed over and walked through—one step, one day, one decision at a time.

So if your knees are shaking today, it’s okay.
If your voice trembles, it’s okay.
If you’re unsure, it’s okay.

Just don’t bow to fear.
Give it to God.
Let Him meet you in it—
and then show up with the kind of courage only surrendered people ever experience.

Faith doesn’t remove fear…
but it transforms it.
And that is recovery.

12/06/2025

Thank you for Reading!

🎁 Holiday Malfunctions Made Fun!

“I’m Fine. You’re Fine. It’s Fine… Right??”

The holidays are here—and for many families impacted by addiction or dysfunction, this season can feel like a full-contact sport. As if staying sober isn’t challenging enough, we add:

🎄 dysfunctional family relationships
🎄 financial stress and gift obligations
🎄 emotional triggers
🎄 expectations to “act merry”
🎄 and everyday life on top of it all

Tap Link Below 👇🏻 to Read🤓

🎁 Holiday Malfunctions Made Fun 🎁 “I’m Fine. You’re Fine. It’s Fine… Right??” The holidays are here—and for many families impacted by addiction or dysfunction, this season can feel like a full-contact sport. As if staying sober isn’t challenging enough, we add: 🎄 dysfunction...

12/06/2025

We are guaranteed experiences that are absolutely right for us today. We are progressing on schedule. Even when our personal hopes are unmet, we are given the necessary opportunities for achieving those goals that complement our unique destinies.

Today is full of special surprises, and we will be the recipient of the ones which are sent to help us grow–in all the ways necessary for our continued recovery. We might not consider every experience a gift at this time. But hindsight will offer the clarity lacking at the moment, just as it has done in many instances that have gone before.

We are only offered part of our personal drama each day. But we can trust our lives to have many scenes, many acts, points of climax, and a conclusion. Each of us tells a story with our lives, one different from all other stories and yet necessary to the telling of many other stories too. The days ahead will help us tell our story. Our interactions with others will influence our outcomes and theirs. We can trust the drama and give fully to our roles.

Every day is a 🎁gift🎁exchange.

I give, and I will receive.