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Sober Life, Santa Rosa Beach, FL (2026)

03/01/2026

March 1

Made the decision to turn our will and lives over to God as we understand Him.
–Step Three

Care. This is what turn our will and lives over to care of our Higher Power. What peace follows! We see our God as caring, as loving. We turn everything over to this Higher Power, who can take better care of us than we can by ourselves. Care can guide us. If we want to do something, we can ask ourselves, “Would my Higher Power see this as an act of care?” If the answer is yes, then we go ahead. If the answer is no, we don’t it. If we can’t be sure, we wait and talk it over with our friends and sponsor. We wait until we know whether it would be an act of care or not. What wonderful guidance!

Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I give to You my will. I give to you my life. I gladly jump into Your loving arms.

Action for the day: Today, I’ll care about others. I’ll find as many as I can to care for others.

02/28/2026

February 28

Leave yourself alone.
—Jenny Janacek

We often pick on ourselves. We put ourselves down. But doing this isn’t part of our recovery.

In fact, it goes against our program. Our program is based on loving care. We have turned our lives over to a caring, loving Higher Power who will give us the answers. We are told Easy Does It. We back off. As recovering addicts, we learn not to judge. Instead, we learn to be kind to ourselves. Our job is not to figure out the world, butt to add more love to it. Let’s start with ourselves.

Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, stop me from judging. Help me know what You want to do. Help me work the Steps Two and Three.

Action for the Day: Today, I’ll leave myself alone. I will remember that picking on myself is another from of control.

02/27/2026

February 27

Our Truth
"Denial is the glue that holds together a dysfunctional home. Family secrets, ignored feelings, and predictable chaos are part of a dysfunctional family system." BRB pg. 22

As we celebrate our willingness in ACA to look at the difficult parts of our lives, we can find ourselves surrounded by those who deny our reality, perhaps in the same way they always have. It can be family members who say "I don't remember it that way." or "It wasn't that bad - we're still alive, aren't we?" Or it can be people we thought were our friends who say "Can't you just live in the now? Why do you even have to think about that stuff?"

These messages can be powerful and can often temporarily convince us we're on the wrong path. But when we look inside, we know what we feel and we know the impact of our childhood. We know we've felt fragmented and crazy inside, trying to figure out what was wrong with us. We know that we want something better.

The Promises of ACA are what we want. The deniers in our life often can't give us anything but more pain. This is why we choose to separate from them and continue to make room for recovery.

On this day I will listen to what's in my heart and know that I am on the right path. I will no longer listen to those who want me back in my old role that makes them more comfortable.

Copyright © 2013 by Adult Children of Alcoholics® & Dysfunctional Families

02/26/2026

February 26

Blame
"The principles of ACA are not about blame." BRB p. xxiii

Some of us may have heard the saying that "a man without arms can't hug you." Our parents/caregivers were not able to give us what they did not have. The disease of alcoholism or other family dysfunction affects generations and did not start with our immediate family.

By working and living the ACA Steps, we realize that we too were unable to give what we did not receive as children. We were not shown how to have healthy relationships, how to raise children or how to avoid feeling "less than." Many of us vowed not to repeat the patterns of our parents. But knowing what not to do does not automatically give us the knowledge of a better way. This is our legacy, but it does not have to stay that way.

We learn to focus on ourselves instead of being lost in blaming those who couldn't give us what we needed. They could not give us what they did not get themselves. Today, we are led in the direction of reparenting ourselves, taking measures to erase the old tapes in our head and honoring our True Self.

On this day I choose not to blame others or myself for being unable to give what was never given to me. I feel grateful knowing that I can break the cycle of dysfunction and live a better life.

Copyright © 2013 by Adult Children of Alcoholics® & Dysfunctional Families

02/25/2026

February 25

You need only claim the events of your life to make yourself yours.
—Florida Scott-Maxwell

The search is on. Everyone, everywhere, asks the question at some time, “Who am I?” Women like ourselves are fortunate to have this program. It shows us the way to self-discovery. It directs our steps to the celebration of self that is a gift of recovery. The events of our past may plague us, but they did contribute to the fullness we feel today. And for them, for their involvement in who we’ve become, we can be grateful.

Claiming ourselves, the good and the bad, is healing. It’s taking responsibility–for where we were and where we’re going. Claiming ourselves makes us the active participants in our lives. The choices are many and varied. Not actively participating in life is also a choice. Passivity may have been our dominant choice in years gone by. But now, today, we are choosing recovery. We are choosing action that is healing, and wholeness is the result.

Making myself mine, will exhilarate me. It will give me hope. It will prepare me for anything to come. I will know a new joy.

02/24/2026

February 24

“Failure is impossible.”
—Susan B. Anthony

Failure is an attitude. Having an attitude of failure can’t help us. It can only hurt us. If we’re not careful, it can grow into a way of life. So, when we feel like failures, we better look at our attitudes.

An attitude of failure often comes from making mistakes. But we can learn to see our mistakes as lessons. This turns mistakes into gains, not failures. Sometimes, we try to do things that just can’t be done.

When we act like we know everything, we’re going to fail. if we try to act like God, we’re going to fail.

We can’t control others. We can’t know everything. We’re not God. We’re human. If we act human, we’ve already won.

Prayer for the Day: Higher power, help me to learn from my attitudes. Whatever the outcome, help me learn.

Action for the Day: Facing our past “failures” is the first step to learning from them. I’ll talk to my sponsor about a past “failure” and the good that came from it.

02/23/2026

February 23

I want to dance always, to be good and not evil, and, when it is all over, not to have the feeling that I might have done better.
—Ruth St. Denis

Our wants in life may be simple, or they may be complex. They may yet be confused in our minds, but the clarity will come if we’re patient. God has a way of giving us an “inner tug” when a certain direction beckons. Our responsibility is to follow that tug and trust it, fully. Too often we look back on our lives with regret. What is done, is done. We learned lessons from those mistakes. Every day is a new beginning. And we can close every day with no regrets when we have followed our consciences, that “inner tug” that beckons.

The opportunities will come today. Opportunities to be good or evil. Opportunities for making choices over which we will feel good or full of regret at the day’s close. Many of our choices will bring us closer to the satisfaction, the contentment with life that we all search for as women, as human beings. We need not fear coming to life’s close, wishing we had done more or better. Living each day in good conscience, waiting for the tug and following it, will ensure a life well lived.

My ego can block out the tug, if I let it. Or I can trust.

02/22/2026

February 22

To thine own self be true.
–AA medallions

Sometimes we hear that we have a “selfish program.” Being “selfish” means that we ask for help when we need it. We only go to places that are safe for us, no matter what others are doing. Being selfish comes to mean safety for us.

Being selfish doesn’t mean we act like brats. We must act in ways that show respect and love—for ourselves and for others. being selfish means we do what is good for us. What is good for us? First, we have to save our lives by stopping our drinking and drugging. Next, we start working the Steps. We come to know a loving Higher Power. This is how we come to know our true self.

Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be true to myself and my values. Help me be “selfish” about spending time to talk with You each day.

Action for the Day: I’ll list ten ways I need to be “selfish” in recovery. If I get stuck, I’ll be “selfish” and ask for help.

02/21/2026

February 21

Solution – Gentleness
"We learn to reparent ourselves with gentleness, humor, love, and respect." BRB p. 590

How do we reparent ourselves with gentleness if roughness or even cruelty was a staple of our childhoods? As we grew, we may not have felt capable of kindness toward ourselves because our critical inner parent was always in our heads saying things like "You fool! Your life's a mess! And you're to blame!"

But we knew we wanted to treat ourselves better; we wanted desperately to have an inner voice shift to something kinder, like "Have a cup of tea with me and tell me what's wrong."

In ACA we learn that if we can catch our critical inner parent at work, we can shift gears and try to do the opposite. When we feel criticized, we can hit the "Whoa!" button and stop ourselves from joining in the frenzy. We can tell ourselves "I can't do better than my best, so I will simply do my best right now." We can even teach ourselves techniques that help calm us down in these situations, like changing our visual image of another person from someone who is menacing to perhaps a kindly cartoon character. Something this simple can help us get through the critical patches.

On this day I will treat my Inner Child and myself to twenty minutes alone over a fresh cup of tea or a glass of juice so we can just listen to each other.

Copyright © 2013 by Adult Children of Alcoholics® & Dysfunctional Families

02/20/2026

February 20
A day of Acceptance
Releasing the Past

“We will not regret the past nor fear the future,” goes one of the promises in Twelve Step programs. Neither the past nor the future should control what we’re thinking and doing today. After all, if our higher power is everything, no person or action can be outside of this supreme control.

Today, I will rise above anything that was said or done in the past. I will also hold the idea that the future is bright with promise, and that this promise will be fulfilled. Nobody’s opinion or criticism can be unsettling to me if my beliefs and self-worth are anchored in my Higher Power.

It’s true that there might have been lots of wreckage in the past…. Even more recently when we have been living sober. It doesn’t matter. I amazing ways, our higher power sometimes turns negative conditions into future benefits. This was actually what happened when our compulsive condition led directly to a new way of life.

I will accept life today and will look for unexpected blessings. No person or group can keep me from good as I accept God’s direction in my life.

“In all your ways acknowledge [God who] shall direct your paths.” I’ll remember this frequently as I go about the day.

02/19/2026

February 19

Reservations
Page 51

"Relapse is never an accident. Relapse is a sign that we have a reservation in our program."

Basic Text, p. 79

A reservation is something we set aside for future use. In our case, a reservation is the expectation that, if such-and-such happens, we will surely relapse. What event do we expect will be too painful to bear? Maybe we think that if a spouse or lover leaves us, we will have to get high. If we lose our job, surely, we think, we will use. Or maybe it's the death of a loved one that we expect to be unbearable. In any case, the reservations we harbor give us permission to use when they come true-as they often do.

We can prepare ourselves for success instead of relapse by examining our expectations and altering them where we can. Most of us carry within us a catalog of anticipated misery closely related to our fears. We can learn how to survive pain by watching other members live through similar pain. We can apply their lessons to our own expectations. Instead of telling ourselves we will have to get high if this happens, we can quietly reassure ourselves that we, too, can stay clean through whatever life brings us today.

Just for Today: I will check for any reservations that may endanger my recovery and share them with another addict.

Sober Life

03/01/2026

02/28/2026

02/27/2026

02/26/2026

02/25/2026

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