01/06/2024
I always say, ‘Bring a smile, and life will smile back at you.’ Yesterday, while at Picasso Coffee, my favorite comfort spot in town, I stood in line, smiling ear to ear, inviting anyone who cared to join in and smile back.
My smile was striking, yet I encountered a woman seemingly indifferent to this simple, joyful exchange. Her lack of response was initially surprising and somewhat disappointing. It made me ponder the barriers we create, consciously or unconsciously, against such effortless, shared moments of happiness. This encounter starkly contrasted genuine, open emotional expression with the often-celebrated ‘cool’ detachment.
Isn’t it a contradiction that being ‘cool’ is seen as being, what? Rough, and a seemingly unflappable demeanor. As if you’ve got everything under control, yet in reality, you don’t. Not only because having everything under control is an impossibility, but also because it’s impossible to handle anything if you are distant and ‘cool’.
In reality, this "cool" demeanor is a form of detachment. How can anyone forge a genuine connection like that? 🤔
Having friends or partners, often require openness. And yes, that means trust that we’ll be fine if we bring down our defenses to allow for emotional engagement, which can be at odds with a cool, detached persona.
A seguro se lo llevaron preso, is a Spanish saying. It means that control is a perception and almost never a reality. Life is inherently unpredictable.
Effectively handling of situations often requires engagement and empathy, which can be challenging to achieve if one is maintaining a distant or detached facade. So, one could go further by being adaptable, than by being ’cool’ right?
In essence, the traditional concept of coolness, while seemingly attractive, can conflict with the emotional and practical demands of real-world interactions and personal growth. True control and coolness might better be represented by emotional intelligence, adaptability, and the ability to connect with others.
Well, I choose positivity.. and I will continue to smile. Will you care to smile back at me?