04/01/2025
I had the perfect weekend.
If someone had asked me to describe my perfect weekend, I’m almost certain it would not resemble this past weekend. My imagined weekend would likely begin with time away from home, participating in some activity, exploring a new trail or city, seeing sights, or perhaps lounging by some body of water. In comparison, my actual weekend took me no further than five miles from my house.
In full transparency, I came into the weekend knowing it would be spent at home. After several full weeks and Spring having finally arrived, we agreed this weekend would be dedicated to outdoor projects, namely readying the backyard for the season. To be clear, I love spending time in our backyard and when we moved a year ago, it was my intention to install a couple of gardens but the season got away from us and this never really materialized. I was determined to not miss the window this year and while excited at the prospect of growing some vegetables and attracting more birds, bees, and butterflies to the yard, I very much viewed this as weekend work.
What then created the shift? How was it that a weekend dedicated to backyard projects became my perfect weekend?
It started with awareness and shifted into intentionality. My Friday night began like most Friday nights in our home, convening for aperitivo before dinner, our formal marker that the weekend has come. We enjoyed a drink, listened to some music, and caught each other up on the week’s activities. We hashed out what we wanted to accomplish in the backyard, enjoyed a simple dinner, had our evening stroll, and settled in for a movie.
Journaling that evening before bed, I found myself writing “it was a perfect evening.” Once on the page, I stared at the words, struck by my use of the word perfect. I make a real effort to be positive but perfect isn’t a common word in my vocabulary. Without question, the evening’s cocktail was exceptional, the meal was tasty, and we were excited to begin our backyard projects. We cuddled through the movie, lights turned low, and indulged with a warm chocolate chip cookie and a pot of tea. Even reading the description now, it sounds like a pretty good evening. But perfect?
That’s when it struck me. It wasn’t any one thing or even the combination of them. It was the feelings they evoked. Feelings of love, safety, partnership, gratitude, and deep contentment. I quickly came to realize I had unconsciously invited those feelings by being fully present; and, as this realization settled in, I decided I would consciously approach the remainder of the weekend with presence, intentionality, and wonder.
Saturday rolled around and we worked tirelessly in the backyard, mending fences, pointing the patio, and preparing the garden areas. While we worked, we took time to admire the early blooms and flowering trees and watch the birds ready their nest in the birdhouse we mounted last season. Later we sat in the backyard, admiring our handiwork and planning the next phase of our projects. That evening, following dinner with our son, we walked to a favorite nightlife spot and had a drink while playing some vintage arcade games. Another perfect day.
Sunday came and while it was less full, it was just as fulfilling, just as perfect.
The more I paused to savor moments in the present, even the small ones like holding hands with my husband while we walked, the more wonderful they became. By the end of the weekend, it was clear that having a perfect day (or weekend) isn’t about what you do, it’s about how you do it and the feelings that come from working with purpose, connecting with others, observing with wonder the natural beauty all around, and even letting your inner child out play. And the more I placed emphasis on being present, attentive, and open, the more perfect I perceived each day to be.