Bortot Counseling Services

09/08/2025

08/24/2025

I absolutely love this quote by Maya Angelou. It is very profound! It helps us recognize that we oftentimes behave and react in the way we were programmed. Our core beliefs and core values, the way we were raised, shape behavior. With self reflection, we can challenge those beliefs and values and change our behaviors. This is a growth mindset! We can reflect back without judgment and view ourselves with self compassion. That version of ourselves did not know what we know now! Learning to accept that is an empowering act of self love. With self reflection, self awareness, self compassion, and self forgiveness, we can make changes to be a better version of ourselves.

08/22/2025

This is SO true!! I talk about these family dynamics and factors when helping clients heal from relational trauma. I hear so often that siblings won’t (or can’t) recognize and validate the different experiences each child had within that family system with those same parents. This can be retraumatizing.

I heard something today that felt like someone quietly rearranged the furniture in my soul.

Gabor Maté, in a conversation with Mel Robbins on her podcast, said:
“No two children grow up in the same home. Even with the same parents.”

And he’s right.
By the time each child is born, the people raising them have already changed.
A father may be softer now, or more guarded.
A mother may be freer, or more worn.
The marriage may be blooming… or quietly cracking.
Money might be scarce, or finally enough to breathe.

And then there’s *us*—the children.
We come with different hearts, different fears, different ways of hearing the same words.
One child feels loved in the quiet; another feels abandoned in it.
One thrives under structure; another wilts.
The same hug, the same house, the same parents—yet completely different worlds.

It made me think about the stories we carry.
How we assume we all lived the same childhood because we shared a roof.
But we didn’t.

We were each raised by a different version of our parents… a version shaped by time, by trials, by joy, by fatigue.

And maybe part of growing up - truly growing up - is making peace with this.
To forgive the versions of our parents who couldn’t give more.
To honor the versions who somehow gave anyway.
And to understand that the love was real, even when it looked nothing alike.

Because love isn’t static.
It’s a living thing—changing, faltering, blooming—just like the people who give it.

08/13/2025

The sentiment that "everyone on Earth is doing the best they can with the wisdom they have" is a powerful idea focused on promoting compassion, understanding, and personal growth.

Here's what this statement suggests:

Empathy and Acceptance: It encourages us to approach others and ourselves with empathy, recognizing that everyone's actions are influenced by their unique experiences, knowledge, and perspectives at a given moment.

Growth Mindset: It implies that our "best" can evolve and improve as our wisdom grows through learning, reflection, and experience.

Self-Compassion: It offers a pathway to self-acceptance, encouraging us to acknowledge that we are doing our best, even when we fall short of our own or others' expectations (according to Tiny Buddha)

Moving from Judgment to Teaching: This perspective shifts our reaction to others' "mistakes" from criticism and punishment to a focus on teaching and providing opportunities for growth and more effective behavior (says Funderstanding)

Acknowledging Limitations: It recognizes that individuals operate within their current understanding and are limited by the information and tools they possess. While striving for wisdom and improvement is important, the core message of this quote emphasizes a compassionate understanding of present capabilities and encourages a focus on learning and growth for ourselves and others.

08/03/2025

I love this! This is something I know I need to work on and wanted to share, because I know others can benefit from these tools also.

07/30/2025

Powerful!

06/27/2025

This!

Don’t force your place in someone’s life.

If someone wants you there, you’ll know.
You won’t have to keep trying to matter.
You won’t feel like you’re bothering them just by being yourself.

You won’t be the only one holding it all together.
You won’t sit there wondering what changed
or why it suddenly feels so distant.

People make time for what matters to them.
If they care, they show it.
If they don’t, they don’t.

And yeah, it hurts.
But trying to hold on when you’re the only one trying
hurts even more.

You shouldn’t have to shrink yourself to fit in.
You shouldn’t have to prove your worth to feel accepted.

The right people won’t make you question where you stand.
They’ll make it clear.
In how they show up,
how they stay,
and how they make you feel seen without asking for it.

Let your presence be a quiet gift,
not something you have to convince anyone to keep.

You’re not a burden.
You never were.
And the people meant for you won’t need reminding.

06/11/2025

You are not your past. You are not your trauma. You are awareness — calm, unshaken, and free. In this powerful 60-second short inspired by Deepak Chopra, we ...