Alli Spotts-De Lazzer, LMFT, CEDS

02/13/2026

Hot take: Discomfort isn’t the enemy.
Sometimes—OFTEN—it’s the signal that growth is happening.

Trying something new can feel awkward, scary, or unsettling—physically, mentally, emotionally. And that doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. It often means you’re stretching beyond what’s familiar.

Staying comfortable keeps things the same.
Stepping into discomfort—or simply letting yourself sit in discomfort that unexpectedly greeted you—opens the door to change.

Don’t equate discomfort with something that’s bad—it’s often a messenger there to teach you growth. 🌱

02/11/2026

Early in my work as a therapist, I rushed to help people change their thoughts.
It’s a common instinct and approach in therapy. And when thoughts are causing undue distress, it makes sense, right? 🧠✨

Over time, I learned something important: Real change doesn’t necessarily start with forcing different thoughts.

It often starts with acceptance: understanding why thoughts formed, what they protected, and how they once served you.🤍

Those thoughts didn’t appear out of nowhere.
They came from experience, survival, and make meaning 🪞

When we slow down and get curious, we create space for change that actually lasts—especially for the thoughts that no longer help us 🌱

Acceptance first.
Curiosity next.
Change follows. ✨

02/10/2026

Sometimes you genuinely can’t pull yourself together to do the thing.
And that doesn’t mean you’re lazy, broken, or failing. 💛

It might mean you’re feeling overwhelmed.
It might mean your nervous system wants/needs a pause.
It might mean today just isn’t the day.

Be kind to yourself in those moments.
You don’t need to shame yourself into motion.

You will get there—in your own time.

02/04/2026

Becoming a licensed therapist isn’t a weekend course or a vibe-based title.
It’s years of graduate school, thousands of supervised clinical hours, rigorous state exams, and ongoing regulation and education.

Most people never see what happens behind the scenes: the training, the supervision, the ethical standards, the accountability.

So if someone is licensed, know this—
that license represents time, sacrifice, oversight, and responsibility.

It’s a complicated, demanding path for a reason. Licenses are for public safety. (end there.) And yes, after one is awarded, the learning and growing don’t stop there. 🧠💛

(And yes—learning never actually stops.)

02/04/2026

Not every reset happens on a Sunday.
Sometimes it’s a random Wednesday where your nervous system finally exhales. 😌

And that reset doesn’t need to be complicated or expensive, it can be something simple.

Like rest.
Self-care.
Or just wearing something that makes you smile.

This sweatshirt says “I’m the original” for a reason—and it came from “Shake It for Self-Acceptance”, a movement I founded that is all about getting people moving in their bodies, celebrating their body, and reconnecting with joy exactly as they are. No fixing. Just being and belonging.

Sometimes it’s exhaling—getting rid of energy stored within.
Sometimes it looks like doing absolutely nothing.
Both count.

02/02/2026

Welcome to my office!

02/02/2026

01/27/2026

Being kind takes intention. Acting rudely often doesn’t.
Choosing goodness means pausing, regulating, caring—even when it’s uncomfortable. It means reflecting instead of reacting, and considering impact instead of just impulse. 🧠✨

And yes… that is HARD to do.

Being a good person asks us to show up with empathy, accountability, and curiosity—especially when no one is watching. That effort shapes our relationships, our communities, and ultimately, who we continue to become. It also matters to how people see us. 🌱

Something being challenging isn’t a reason not to choose it. Sometimes it’s the reason to choose it.

01/26/2026

Hot tip for a more peaceful life: stop assuming other people think, feel, and process the world (interactions, what you say, circumstances, etc.) the same way you do. 🧠

Not everyone has the same capacity, context, or internal “map.”

You can give someone clear information and still watch them interpret it wildly differently than you expected—and that doesn’t mean you did or said anything wrong!

Understanding this doesn’t mean excusing harm.
It means releasing unrealistic expectations… and protecting your own peace.

01/24/2026

The “I love whatever is wrong with you” comments makes me laugh — because what people really mean is this:

“I love your unique weirdness.”
“I love your quirks.”
“I love the parts of you that don’t fit the mold.”

We’re all weirdos.
You, me, the person making your coffee, the person in the grocery line… We’re all gloriously imperfect humans.

So here’s a reminder:
Your weirdness isn’t something to fix.
It’s something to celebrate.

Love your weirdo-ness.
And, know that you are loved because of it. 💛

quirkyandproud

01/23/2026

✨ Therapy is a relationship — and you have a say in it.

If it feels off, uncomfortable, or just not right…
that’s valid.
And it matters.

You don’t have to stay in a therapy situation that doesn’t feel like a fit.

And you also have permission to say:
“I don’t connect here.”
“I don’t feel safe here.”
“This isn’t working for me.”

Trust your instincts.
Your comfort and healing matter.
And you deserve a therapist who feels like a good match. Science supports that the alliance can help with positive results, which means achieving YOUR therapy goals!

If you’re unsure, it’s okay to ask questions, set boundaries or not, and explore other options.
Therapy tends to work best when it’s a place where you feel supported and seen— not forced.