Inner Journey Counseling Center

02/18/2026

Food for thought

What not to do this year?
Play safe. Stay stuck. Silence yourself.

The Fire Horse rewards action, instinct, and courage. If something is ending, let it end. If something is calling you forward, run toward it. 🔥

This isn’t the year to hesitate.

02/15/2026

Short story analogy.

I've played pool for about 35 years. It's been an important game to me as it requires skill, precision, strategy, focus, and control. Attributes that I try to apply to life, to my roles as a father, a once husband, a therapist, and a human soul. To me, in the game, I am always competing against myself, not the opponent (which has mostly been my father for those 35 years). In the past month or so, I've had a very interesting journey in my playing, which is actually analogous to my life and self growth.

I started watching videos on advanced techniques in side spin on the cue ball and more control of cue ball placement after a shot and lining up the next shots. I started to approach the game a little differently and my skill dipped down for a little bit as I had to adjust and approach things differently. Then I advanced more quickly than I had in 35 years. I leveled up and began to more consistently run the table almost each time with one turn. I then upgraded my cue tip and dipped back down for a moment and then improved again. I was playing very well for about a month, then I crashed. For the past 3 weeks it went away completely. I was inconsistent, missing shots that I should easily make and had regressed significantly. I couldn't figure out why. It has been beyond frustrating, defeating, and unraveling.

Then, I realized that my nervous system crashed because it was so intense and that I need to reset. I'm in the active phase of resetting right now. With that said, I decided that I didn't lose skill all of the sudden. I was performing at such a high level and I was getting use to that and felt the internal pressure (and confidence) that I could run tables and almost not miss any shot. When I started to miss, I would say "that's unacceptable", "I shouldn't have missed that", etc. I was/am very hard on myself and things declined very quickly.

And, just like in my life in the past few years and more recently, there was joy, love, peace, connection, then loss and devastation. Then a little bit of respite from all of that heavy weight; a period of coming back online again, alive, seeing in color, tasting, and smelling life. Then, complete devastation again as it went away in such an abrupt and blindsided way. The experience of this loss was extra traumatic because it came after a lot of darkness and sadness and was so positively impactful. It hit hard. And, there are two ways to look at it. One, through the lens of shock and trauma and frustration; i.e. just when you finally have something nice or feel relief or joy, bam, it gets taken away. And two, through the lens of beauty and gratitude for the experience that helped me to come back online, for the time of feeling beautiful things, and for the positive lessons learned and the very difficult lessons learned.

Back to pool, so I realized that this intense month of advanced playing was amazing. It's not gone forever or taken away. It gave me a preview of myself, my future self, my evolving self, but it couldn't be sustained without a reset. The nervous system was running at full speed and it crashed. So, I am currently accepting that. I'm resetting my philosophy on approaching the game. I just played another 2 hour session with basic techniques. Just pocketing balls, no side spin, no cue ball placement, etc. Just simple play. The goal here was to recalibrate and to play without emotion, without expectation, without pressure. I was able to do that. My skill was "okay" during that play, but again, not the goal. I played with peace and acceptance. I will not just "get back" to where I was, I will evolve into something else, both in pool and within self. This is an exercise in grounding within and not from the external.

If you stayed with this story this long, I thank you very very much. I hope you can glean something from this. A very special and wise person once told me about investing that I should "buy in the dip". Meaning that when the value went down, invest more in it because it's going to skyrocket one day. I agreed with her then regarding investments, and I believe that it's important to do symbolically and spiritually, and holistically as well.

When I dip down in functioning, in emotion, in feeling defeat and frustration, I am learning to lean into that as an opportunity for growth and an opportunity for investment.

So, the question I pose to you, How will you buy in the dip?

02/06/2026

So what would happen if you took a risk? But what would happen if you didn’t?

Things are scary, growth is scary. We cannot guarantee safety, emotionally or physically. We should protect ourselves and not be wreckless, and yet we cannot refuse to live based on fear and avoidance either.

What is the balance?

If I ride the motorcycle when it’s 14 degrees outside with snow and ice on the road, that comes with a certain risk and discomfort. Will the tires have traction? Will I crash? Will I make it to work? Will I make it home to my children in the dark tonight?

But what if I don’t ride the bike today? That could all still happen in a car. I could also miss an opportunity to connect with the freedom and experience of riding the bike, connection to nature.

I can listen to music in my helmet and be in solitude, while also being aware that there is no one in the back of the bike to share this experience with. I am aware of who is no longer in my life, and I am both aware of why that is and unsure why that is. I can accept It and be extremely saddening by It as well.

All of these things are true at the same time and I can feel ALL of the feelings of everything at the same time. So what does one do? I choose to live and experience all of it, I choose to simply make a decision to ride the bike in 14 degrees with hope, prayer, intention and to invest in a small small moment of joy.

I hope you can to today. Take a risk, do something that may be difficult but that may be worth it.

What could happen if you do? What could happen if you don’t?

02/04/2026

Reframing: Being emotionally triggered is also encouraging you to evolve into the best version of yourself.

02/03/2026

Never underestimate the power of a handwritten letter to someone to express yourself. Especially if it’s after midnight.

01/31/2026

All energy is only borrowed, and one day you have to give it back….

So, what will you do with it while it’s in you and around you?

01/29/2026

The sacred love of an animal.....and specifically dogs......

If a dog (in this example) loves unconditionally, then why do we often feel unworthy of love from others?

They love from the purest and most sacred soulful place. They love without expectation nor pressure. They love even if/when they are hurt, neglected, or mistreated. It takes a lot to turn a dog's heart colder.

What if dogs are sent here to mirror to us that we are worthy of that kind of love?

What if they teach us things from their ethereal wisdom? Things like nurturing another soul in need, giving affection, building trust with another soul, receiving their love, receiving their protection, and learning to let go of ego and to learn to love with humbleness as they age and require more care and assistance.

Is that a love you are willing to accept?
Is that a love you are willing to give?
Is that a love you are willing to invest in?
Is that a love you are willing to trust?
Is that a love that is given to us inherently as a human?

Is the word DOG, chosen by GOD as a mirror to us?

Whether you have a dog, or another animal, or another person in your life to share love with, I encourage you to ponder this concept of LOVE. This pure and beautiful gift. Yes, it comes with complication and risk, but LOVE for the sake of LOVE is a beautiful thing.

Embrace it, emulate it, be it.

Be.
LOVE.

01/19/2026

What if you didn't chose the familiar pain of loneliness?

If you want, if you crave connection, intimacy, support, partnership, and safety, then you have to overcome the wounds that make that seem impossible.

Facing your fears can allow a path of healing and of connection. Be cautious, there are those who truly are energy vampires. However, there are some whom truly are safe and pure of heart and intention.

Sometimes it's worth stepping into an uneasy situation in service of growth and connection. Yes, working on yourself and practicing solitude and self-love is very very important. And, there can be beauty in learning and growing in connection with another who can mirror things to you in a way that is loving, kind, and without judgement or pressure.

If you find a person like that in your life, it's rare. Maybe that person was placed in your life to help you get there, to the place that you want. But maybe you may have to let them hold your hand while you get there?

01/12/2026

What do we try to learn the most about in this life?

If we are being honest and insightful, the answer Is…….

The self.

And yet, we flee from ourselves, from knowing and from facing ourselves.

We are often ashamed of ourselves, fearful, angry at the self. So we look to others for blame, for praise, for comfort, for absolution.

Why? Why are we afraid of ourselves? Why do we run away from and reject ourselves?

Most of us are lost, but perhaps one must be lost to be found. It is my hope, intention and prayer that myself and any reader of this seek to find the self, to truly know and learn the self, and then to find a place to belong. Find those with whom to share life and this wild ride we call human existence.

12/31/2025

Transitions...... transitions tend to be gradual, so as a gentle reminder with the upcoming New Year, consider gradual changes.

For example, it will take some time to come down off of the intensity of the holidays and the pressures of the past month or so.

Also, when people reference 2025 being the year of the snake and shedding and 2026 being the year of the horse, let us consider that this is according to the Chinese calendar.

This year, 2026, the Chinese New Year will be on February 17th and the celebration lasts until March 3rd.

So, give yourself, give the universe, give other grace to adapt and adjust for a while into this New Year. Let us hope and pray that this upcoming year brings us new found strength, clarity, focus, productivity, and peace.

We will continue to face difficult and challenging times, that will not change, but perhaps we can set the intention to handle those challenges with more clarity and intention to resolve and change things, old stories from the past, old narratives, all in service of growth.

12/26/2025

Just taking a moment to sit in stillness, to work on healing and resetting.