Stop CMV-Nebraska

03/10/2022

This!

“It took my breath away.”

I’ll never forget when I truly experienced my breath being taken away.

My breathing was shallow as they searched for Laurelai’s heartbeat on the fetal doppler and then became more and more shallow as they searched for a sign of life on the ultrasound machine.

The first time my breath was taken away?

It happened when my doctor muttered those four life changing words.

“There is no heartbeat.”

I inhaled with shock. The shock of a new reality.

In that very moment, I truly realized the meaning of loss.

My breathing stayed shallow up until I saw her. Where I again had my breath taken away.

There was a bitter beauty about this time. She was perfect and I remember feeling an overwhelming feeling of guilt that I was still breathing when she wasn’t.

That last inhale I took before I lost her has never fully been breathed back out. I live in the inhale of all of the lost moments…the lost life that I get flashes of on a day to day basis.

And I feel like I won’t be able to fully breathe again until I see her again. My breathing will forever be shallow until I take my last.

So for now, as I live my life without my beautiful baby I wait…

I wait until I can breathe again.

-Hailey Ricks
Stillborn Still Loved Foundation

03/10/2022

♥️

When I say that my daughter died, people will often respond: “I’m sorry I didn’t know.”

Their response makes me smile in that sad sort of way because it reminds me that when my baby died, there was so much I didn’t know.

I didn’t know it was possible to keep breathing when your baby’s breaths have suddenly stopped.

I didn’t know it was still possible for a baby to be stillborn.

I didn’t know that a life could end before it really began.

I didn’t know that you could hold your baby after they died.

I didn’t know how hard you could fall in love with someone who’s already missing.

I didn’t know they made hats that tiny.

I didn’t know how hard it would be to watch them leave in a nurse’s arms knowing they would never come back.

I didn’t know how much paperwork is involved in deciding what to do with your child’s remains.

I didn’t know what it would be like to leave the hospital with a box of memories instead of a baby.

I didn’t know that your baby can get a death certificate without getting a birth certificate.

I didn’t know they made urns so small.

I didn’t know how comforting and heartbreaking it would be to have that tiny urn on my nightstand.

I didn’t know they made so many different kinds of sympathy cards.

I didn’t know how uncomfortable I can make people by simply stating my truth.

I didn’t know how much one person can cry.

I didn’t know there were so many excuses for avoiding a person just because their baby died.

I didn’t know it was possible to live life when it felt like it already ended.

There was so much I didn’t know about having a dead baby and now, I do.

To those who don’t know what it’s like to lose your baby, consider it your privilege.

If you don’t know what it’s like to have your baby die then please don’t judge us for how we are living after our loss. You don’t need to know exactly what I’m feeling in order to love me and care for me.

Because once upon a time, I didn’t know what it was like either.

Now, I have no choice but to figure it out.

10/09/2021

🤍

October is Month and we're spreading awareness by sharing things that bereaved parents from our community wished their family, friends, and acquaintances knew. RTZ's vision during and always, is that every family experiencing pregnancy and infant loss will have access to resources, social support, and informed professional care to empower families to live a meaningful and hopeful life.⁠
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If you're a bereaved parent, visit the parent portion of our website for resources, support, retreat information and more at rtzhope.org/parents⁠
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If you know someone who has experienced the loss of their baby, we have resources, suggestions, and information on how to best support them at rtzhope.org/family⁠
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If you're a provider that cares for bereaved families, we've put together information, education and resources at rtzhope.org/providers⁠
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You can also access our entire website and resources by visiting rtzhope.org

10/04/2021

Research has shown that 80% of symptomatic babies don't get diagnosed with CMV.
-
This highlights the need for more complete identification and .

09/23/2021

♥️

Check out this new Australian program that allows parents to test their newborns for at home!

http://ow.ly/1wPj50GcX16

09/21/2021

Kinley’s CMV Story
♥️

09/16/2021

🙏🏼Stop CMV

Truth ❤️

09/12/2021

That phrase terrifies me. Because we're talking about our children -- an arrangement that's supposed to be unconditional -- and as long as they're healthy! is alarmingly conditional. Everyone's happy for a new baby and congratulations are in order -- but only under certain criteria. Right? And if baby doesn't meet that criteria, well, all bets are off. All the congratulations vanish. Your support system bottoms out from under you. People start whispering. Doctors start talking about going in another direction. Changing the course of the pregnancy. Disrupting the pregnancy. Termination. Because, clearly, if your child isn't picture-perfect, a SWIFT DEATH is preferable. Clearly.
It's not wrong to want a healthy baby, make no mistake. Nobody prefers a medically fragile baby. Nobody wants to see her child suffer. So we wish for health. We make ominous, defensive, vague statements. Everything will be OK -- unless it's not!
Let's retire that phrase. Shall we?

We're talking about our children -- an arrangement that's supposed to be unconditional -- and as long as they're healthy! is alarmingly conditional. Everyone's happy for a new baby and congratulations are in order -- but only under certain criteria. Right?

09/07/2021

♥️Screen for CMV

Infants born with asymptomatic congenital CMV may not be asymptomatic forever. A 2007 study shows that 13.5% of infants, who were asymptomatic at birth, will develop permanent issues later in life. This group represents more babies than those born with cCMV symptoms. (Dollard 2007)

Learn about congenital CMV.
Learn how to protect your unborn baby.
Learn what to look out for after birth.
Learn the .

(Study reference: Dollard SC, Grosse SD, Ross DS. New estimates of the prevalence of neurological and sensory sequelae and mortality associated with congenital cytomegalovirus infection. Rev Med Virol. 2007 Sep-Oct;17(5):355-63)

08/07/2021

08/04/2021

👇🏼

I hear it at least once a week–usually from a meme on social media. Someone joking that “at least I kept the kids alive.” While other moms might scroll by with a giggle and barely…

08/02/2021

♥️

Together, we can . Together, we can . Together, we will advocate . Together, we will increase . Together, we will make a difference.