08/06/2025
Your body will take on many forms in your life. Mine sure has.
I’ve been “fat” - definitely carrying more weight than I ever should have. At one point I was over 250 pounds when I was younger.
I have the type of frame where I can take off weight, add on muscle easily, OR pack on fat when my depression isolates me from the world and I resort to unhealthy coping mechanisms around binge eating.
I’ve done a lot of self-work...and when I say A LOT, I mean I’ve spent a small fortune on therapy over the years just to understand the trauma I hold in my body and what triggers me and why I allow my eating disorder to separate me from the world at times.
I found exercise in my youth.
I got a degree in exercise science to try to figure ME out, and along the way, even with UPs (HUGE WEIGHT GAIN AT TIMES) and DOWNs, I have been able to help a lot of people.
These last two years were full of UPs and DOWNs.
Stress, injury, financial insecurity...I went from the woman you see on the left to an out of shape woman (not pictured), and then finally back to me.
Yes, I am 25 pounds lighter than I was 2 years ago.
Do I miss that fitness and the amount of muscle I had on my body then? A little but taking off some muscle in my case makes my body feel much better... and post Achilles injury I’ve retired my days of hard training for Hyrox or any other extreme sport to just focus on my overall health.
Here’s the thing about taking off muscle. If you have a solid base like I did, taking down some of the bulk isn’t a bad thing.
My workouts are still intense, but different. I train for overall function of my body and I don’t push it.
I eat well.
I fast.
I got my hormones in check (that was a process, but so worth it).
I made significant life changes.
AND....
I work every day on loving myself.
Your body will have many changes, but the lesson I have learned is that no matter if I am 250 pounds or 160, I’m worthy of love...starting with my own love first.