Debbie Rivera - Love, Connection, Marriage, Healing The Hurts

06/04/2023

Helpful when for your marriage too!

Have a great weekend!

05/10/2023

"We come to love
not by finding a perfect person,
but by learning to see
an imperfect person
perfectly."

~ Sam Keen ~

10/31/2022

Any issue left unaddressed will fester and become worse over time. It won’t only build resentment around you, but it will cause your partner to feel less safe around you.

When you avoid conflict, you can come off as threatening to your partner. They will likely sense something is wrong, which will cause their brain to go negative and come up with all the worst possibilities.

This is why it’s critical to have an agreement with one another to avoid nothing and address problems as soon as they arise.

10/23/2022

10/06/2022

As we grow in our marriage we learn how much more we are capable of giving to each other.

"We are told that people stay in love because of chemistry, or because they remain intrigued with each other, because of many kindnesses, because of luck. But part of it has got to be forgiveness and gratefulness." -Ellen Goodman

08/23/2022

Being the best you can be so you bring out the best in each other changes everythibg.

Chapter 1 is free at https://www.brucelipton.com/books/ -effect

05/29/2022

There is always something you can do to connect again, to repair, to create a memory, to discover something new, to love . . .

05/29/2022

Sometimes it's hard to know what your spouse is feeling. Look for ways to help them express and release the emotion. Create closeness through understanding.

Communication is key! 😂💕

05/27/2022

How many times have you had this happen in your relationship? Projection isn't about you at all. It is a deflection from someone being able to look at themselves. Now I know that is a hard thing to do but it will keep you from pushing your spouse away.

Don’t take anything personally because by taking things personally you set yourself up to suffer for nothing.
Don Miguel Ruiz

You have the choice what to let in. It’s critically important to understand that a negative opinion expressed towards you is, more often than not, simply projection. That person is taking unwanted emotions they dislike about themselves and trying to attribute them to you. By building your resilience to criticism you create a wall of immunity which is a powerful shield for your own equanimity.

Of course, not taking things personally is a hugely challenging task but, by bringing consciousness to what it is you’re about to react to, you can aim for a more dignified engagement. Remember, a simple slow breath can help build an important wedge between the initial stimulus and your response, gifting you perspective. Understand that it is not about you. Always seek a growth opportunity in how you react. In doing so we can aim to live with more calm and compassion for ourselves and others.

When you make it a strong habit not to take anything personally, you avoid many upsets in your life. Your anger, jealousy, and envy will disappear and even your sadness will simply disappear if you don’t take things personally.
Don Miguel Ruiz

Whatever happens around you, don’t take it personally. Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves. All people live in their own dream, in their own mind; they are in a completely different world from the one we live in. When we take something personally, we make the assumption that they know what is in our world, and we try to impose our world on their world.

Even when a situation seems so personal, even if others insult you directly, it has nothing to do with you. What they say, what they do, and the opinions they give are according to the agreements they have in their own minds.

As you make a habit of not taking anything personally, you won’t need to place your trust in what others do or say. You will only need to trust yourself to make responsible choices. You are never responsible for the actions of others; you are only responsible for you. When you truly understand this and refuse to take things personally, you can hardly be hurt by the careless comments or actions of others.

If you keep this agreement, you can travel around the world with your heart completely open and no one can hurt you. You can say, “I love you,” without fear of being ridiculed or rejected. You can ask for what you need. Feel safe by standing in your truth with love and peace 💛🌻🦋

Victoria Peace
www.peacecompassionlove.com 💖

05/27/2022

05/27/2022

Listening creates connection!

Safe Conversations Essentials helps you move from conflict to connection in all of your relationships. Experience it for yourself.