Nicole N. Kaufman, High Performance Counseling

02/26/2026

Couples therapy doesn't work. Yeah I said it. You are responsible for how you show up in the relationship. Work on yourself. You CAN be the change you want to see in your relationship.

02/25/2026

Why yes, I AM a Certified Narcissistic Abuse Treatment Clinician!

02/11/2026

I already have clients telling me, "I asked Chat, and Chat said...."
Often, "what Chat said" is not wholly wrong or off the mark. Quite the opposite. "I would agree with that," is often what I think.
Oh. My. The implications.

Something Big Is Happening

02/10/2026

Dilemma: Couple's counseling will not fit into the schedule. Spouse giving you pushback, he'll go if he has to.
Answer? The Marriage Minute https://www.gottman.com/marriage-minute/
Both of you read it, discuss it, and commit putting the tips and tricks into practice. And there you have it -- therapy that works!
You are welcome.

The Marriage Minute is an email newsletter from The Gottman Institute that can improve your relationship with regular helpful tips and tricks

02/09/2026

Q: Do you know what makes anxiety and depression worse?

A: Rumination, i.e. talking about it, focusing on it, turning it over and over in your mind. Bonus points for talking about it with your spouse, children, mother, and the lady who does your nails.

Talking endlessly about your feelings is a one-way ticket to misery.

02/06/2026

What brought you joy today?

Was it the first sip of coffee?
The way your partner’s beautiful brown eyes took you in?
The way the sun danced on the water?

Joy is all around us.
We just have to notice it.

02/04/2026

One of the most important emotional skills no one taught us:

Feelings are one word.
Anything longer is a thought about the feeling.

This distinction matters more than you think—especially in relationships, stress, and healing old patterns.

Helping people slow down, identify emotions accurately, and respond instead of react is a core part of my work as a therapist.
And yes—this is absolutely something you can learn.

02/02/2026

When you’re in the wrong relationship, every day is the same script:
You explain. They deflect. Nothing changes.
Six more years of winter if you stay. 🥶
Plot twist: you’re allowed to change the season.
Let me show you how :)

02/01/2026

Trust only movement. Life happens at the level of events, not of words. Trust movement.
-Alfred Adler

01/23/2026

One of the best articles I've read lately on creating real change for yourself. All you need is this article and a good therapist to keep you accountable. I might know someone...😛

How to fix your entire life in 1 day

09/30/2025

Thank you Voyage Tampa.com for the opportunity!

https://voyagetampa.com/interview/hidden-gems-meet-nicole-kaufman-of-high-performance-counseling

Today we’d like to introduce you to Nicole Kaufman. Hi Nicole, it’s an honor to have you on the platform. Thanks for taking the time to share your story with us – to start maybe you can share some of your backstory with our readers?My path to mental health counseling was anything but straightf...