02/06/2026
A subtle baiting tactic covert narcissists often use is negative self-condemnation.
Instead of asking directly for affirmation or reassurance, they criticize themselves in hopes that you will rush in with compliments, validation, or emotional caretaking.
For example, when a covert narcissist puts themselves down, your instinct may be to reassure them.
But reassurance often feeds the bait, not the problem.
A healthier, more grounded response is something neutral and redirecting, such as:
“A friend of mine has a really good Christian therapist. Would you like me to get the number for you?”
The narcissist will not like this response.
But your goal is not to gain their approval or keep them comfortable.
Your goal is to offer what is truly in their best interest.
Just like with other forms of narcissistic baiting, we do not feed ego, entitlement, or manipulation.
We offer truth, responsibility, and a path toward healing.
What is best for a narcissist is not endless affirmation from others.
It is learning to develop self-worth through Christ, Scripture, repentance, and the guidance of the Holy Spirit.
True worth does not come from “hunting” compliments or emotional supply.
It comes from surrender—learning to ask for needs directly, honestly, and in a God-honoring way.
Withholding ego-fuel is not unloving.
Pointing someone toward Christ-centered help is often the most loving response available.