Vanessa Pate, MA, LPC

10/10/2025

💚 Today is World Mental Health Day a reminder that mental health isn’t something we can separate from the rest of our lives. It’s not just a box to check, and it’s not only relevant in moments of crisis.

Our mental health is the foundation of how we relate, lead, love, cope, connect, and simply exist in the world.

Yet so many of us move through our days on autopilot, disconnected from ourselves, pushing through exhaustion, feeling “off” but not sure why. Telling ourselves, “It’s not that bad.”

But what if, just for a moment, you slowed down?
Not to analyze or fix yourself, but to gently notice what’s here.

What feelings are asking to be felt?
What parts of you are tired of holding it all together?
What have you been overriding, postponing, or pushing down?

You don’t need a clear answer.
You don’t need to justify your pain.
You just need a little space to ask, “How am I, really?”
And to meet whatever arises with care and compassion ❤️

This World Mental Health Day, may we remember;
Mental health isn’t a luxury. It’s a human need.
Tending to it isn’t selfish, it’s brave.

You deserve to feel at home within yourself. 💚

09/25/2025

Words Matter ✨

So often when kids are upset, our natural instinct is to say things like “Calm down” or “You’re fine.” But while well-intentioned, those phrases can feel dismissive and actually shut down communication.

This chart is such a helpful reminder that small shifts in our words can make a BIG difference. Instead of telling kids how they should feel, we can acknowledge what they are feeling, and give them tools to work through it.

08/12/2025

Hey Mamas! the kids are back in school… now it’s your turn

Whether your days are now a little quieter or still packed with to do’s, this is your reminder:
You deserve space to take care of YOU.

And to my ADHD and neurodivergent mamas, I see you!
As a mom myself to a high-energy, ADHD kiddo with so many incredible strengths, I know that parenting can feel both beautiful and challenging at times.

In my work (and in my own home), I’ve seen how powerful it is when we learn new ways to support our kids, and how equally important it is to care for our own nervous systems in the process. When we’re regulated, grounded, and resourced, we show up for our children in ways that change the whole atmosphere at home.

If you’re ready to learn tools, tips, and real-life strategies for parenting your neurodivergent child and for taking care of you in the process… I’m here to walk with you.❤️

07/18/2025

As a mom and a therapist, I know how easy it is to lose sight of yourself in the beautiful chaos of caring for everyone else. We give and give, until we forget who we are beneath all the roles we carry.

But the truth is… you’re still in there. Worthy. Whole. Enough.
You don’t need to be “fixed” you just need space to return to yourself!

If you’re tired, overwhelmed, or just feeling a little lost, I see you. And I’d be honored to walk with you as you find your way home. 🩷

03/21/2025

If you haven’t read The 5 Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell, I highly recommend it! Just like adults, kids have unique ways they feel most loved, and understanding your child’s love language can completely transform your relationship with them.

The five love languages are:

❤️ Physical Touch – Hugs, cuddles, and high-fives make them feel secure.

🗣 Words of Affirmation – They thrive on encouragement, kind words, and praise.

⏳ Quality Time – Undivided attention makes them feel valued.

🎁 Gifts – Small surprises and meaningful tokens speak volumes.

🛠 Acts of Service – Doing things for them (like helping with homework) shows love.

When we learn to love our children in the way they best receive it, we nurture their emotional security, boost their confidence, and strengthen our bond with them.

Have you discovered your child’s love language?

03/03/2025

The teen years, a time of growth, change, and, let’s be honest, a lot of deep breaths for both parents and teens.

It’s easy to get caught up in the surface behaviors such as, the eye rolls, mood swings, or sudden silence, but what if we took a step back and looked inside?

Teens are navigating a whirlwind of emotions, identity shifts, and brain development. When parents take the time to truly understand what’s going on beneath the surface, something powerful happens:
✨ Connection deepens.
✨ Communication opens.
✨ Conflicts soften.

Instead of reacting to the what, we start responding to the why.

If you’re feeling the strain of this season, know that you’re not alone. It’s tough, but it’s also an incredible opportunity to build trust and strengthen your bond with your teen.

10/07/2024

The holidays are coming, and I know for busy moms, it can be hard to take care of ourselves the way we truly want to. I have partnered up with Jules Parkin, a psychotherapist and yoga teacher, to create a 2-hour relaxing workshop just for moms! Join us on Sunday, October 20th, for an afternoon of stress management tools, self-reconnection, and building community with other moms on a similar journey. You deserve this time to recharge before the holiday rush! 🌿Register here: https://www.julesparkin.com/Only 12 spots available, $65 per person.Let’s take this time for ourselves, mamas—you’re worth it! 💖

09/10/2024

💚Today is World Su***de Prevention Day 💚

As a licensed mental health professional, I’ve had the privilege of walking alongside people through their darkest moments, witnessing incredible strength and resilience in places of deep pain.

Today we shine a light to those struggling silently and honor the importance of mental health.

To anyone feeling lost or overwhelmed, please remember
💚 You matter
💚 Your pain is real, but so is hope
💚 You are not alone, even when it feels like the weight of the world is too heavy to carry.

There is no shame in asking for help -whether it’s reaching out to a loved one, a mental health professional, or simply taking one step forward today. You are worthy of care, and compassion, support no matter what.

Let’s keep the conversation around mental health open and honest, offering a hand to those who needed most.

Together, we can break the stigma and create a world where every life is valued.

If you or someone you know is struggling please don’t hesitate seek help. I am here to help so feel free to message me.

It can and it will get better 💚

09/02/2024

Brainspotting is becoming widely recognized as a trauma treatment method. This article from Forbes also addresses BSP's value in sports performance enhancement. Brainspotting is such a powerful tool with incredibly diverse applications.

Healing from trauma can be so overwhelming, we often think that it involves the retelling the story, time and time again 😮‍💨

Whilst having our story heard and witnessed can be a beautiful experience- processing and healing trauma doesn’t require it.

Brainspotting is powerful, yet gentle therapeutic technique that taps in your brain’s (and body) natural ability to heal itself.

Whether you are dealing with trauma or emotional wounds, brainspotting offers a safe way to explore and release that pain.

It’s a journey that respects your pace and your story 💛
If you are curious about this please reach out!

https://www.forbes.com/health/mind/brainspotting/?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR2cpt9AgjpM0XlBMZnaeD-rUls8C4M5408qwoGa7qUJE-IISfFE2EOlRmc_aem_V8pD3UpDyWCvhuOUkbm7sg

Brainspotting: How It Works And What To Expect

07/31/2024

Going back to school can be anxiety-inducing! Here are a few tips how to help your kids manage their anxiety. I am here to help ❤️

07/19/2024

Teach your kids empathy by modeling it yourself. Make them feel heard and understood, and they'll carry those skills with them. Remember, it's not always about solving problems, but about listening. 🌟

04/04/2024

When a child is angry try saying these words to show compassion. ❤️

Remember, when a child is angry, disrespectful and hurtful with words or actions they are hurting inside.

❓Have you ever found yourself lashing out or being unkind when you are hurting?

Children respect and admire their parents AND they also say unkind words when they are angry and hurting inside. In fact, many different emotions show up as anger. Maybe they are scared, overwhelmed or worried.

❓So the question becomes, how can you address this behavior while at the same time hold their hurt with compassion?

When your child lashes out with angry words and behavior it’s easy to be triggered and think that they do not respect you and then you find yourself reacting from a place of anger and hurt too.

❓What if you decided to meet their anger with compassion, understanding and deep listening?

When you meet your child with compassion, the words you say lets them know that you understand their need to express their feelings and that they have a right to do so without fear of punishment. When you do you create a safe space for them.
Your child also feels safe when you hold boundaries and while at the same time allow them to feel their feelings - of course without hurting anyone with words or actions.

When you meet our child’s hurt with anger it turns into anger meeting anger. When you meet our child’s hurt with compassion you are able to offer them a loving space held by your loving words. Still hold a firm boundary by saying “Those words hurt, I will help you find another way to say why you’re angry.” Or “I will not let you hit or hurt anyone and it’s important to me to know what is hurting your heart.”

I believe children are all heart, their nature is love and they want to be loved unconditionally. When you see the opposite in their nature then you know they are hurting inside and unable to fully express their big feelings - so it’s your job to help them - with compassion, understanding and deep listening.