Counseling Conejo Valley

Counseling Conejo Valley �Providing therapy, counseling and mental health resources to the greater Conejo Valley
Addiction
(3)

07/10/2023

DEPRESSION TIPS:
Shower. Not a bath, a shower.
Use water as hot or cold as you like. You don’t even need to wash. Just get in under the water and let it run over you for a while. Sit on the floor if you gotta.
Moisturize everything.
Use whatever lotion you like.
Unscented? Dollar store lotion? Fancy 48 hour lotion that makes you smell like a field of wildflowers? Use whatever you want, and use it all over your entire dermis.
Put on clean, comfortable clothes.
Put on your favorite underwear.
Cute black lacy panties? Those ridiculous boxers you bought last christmas with candy cane hearts on the butt? Put them on.
Drink cold water.
Use ice. If you want, add some mint or lemon for an extra boost.
Clean something.
Doesn’t have to be anything big. Organize one drawer of a desk. Wash five dirty dishes. Do a load of laundry. Scrub the bathroom sink.
Blast music.
Listen to something upbeat and dancey and loud, something that’s got lots of energy. Sing to it, dance to it, even if you suck at both.
Make food.
Don’t just grab a granola bar to munch. Take the time and make food. Even if it’s ramen. Add something special to it, like a soft boiled egg or some veggies. Prepare food, it tastes way better, and you’ll feel like you accomplished something.
Make something.
Write a short story or a poem, draw a picture, color a picture, fold origami, crochet or knit, sculpt something out of clay, anything artistic. Even if you don’t think you’re good at it. Create.
Go outside.
Take a walk. Sit in the grass. Look at the clouds. Smell flowers. Put your hands in the dirt and feel the soil against your skin.
Call someone.
Call a loved one, a friend, a family member, call a chat service if you have no one else to call. Talk to a stranger on the street. Have a conversation and listen to someone’s voice. If you can’t bring yourself to call, text or email or whatever, just have some social interaction with another person. Even if you don’t say much, listen to them. It helps.
Cuddle your pets if you have them/can cuddle them.
Take pictures of them. Talk to them. Tell them how you feel, about your favorite movie, a new game coming out, anything.



Good reminder for this holiday season.
12/07/2022

Good reminder for this holiday season.

Uncertainty and change can cause us to feel anxious. Practice reminding yourself that feelings are temporary, even the m...
10/01/2022

Uncertainty and change can cause us to feel anxious. Practice reminding yourself that feelings are temporary, even the most unpleasant feelings will end.

You are not alone. There is help for postpartum anxiety.
08/22/2022

You are not alone. There is help for postpartum anxiety.

Anxiety and intrusive thoughts can be exhausting, but they aren't uncommon. There is help available and treatment can include medication, therapy and other lifestyle changes. Chat with your healthcare provider about how you're feeling and get the help you need today.

Tomorrow is our last group for the summer.  Looking forward to seeing everyone there!10:45-11:45am at Brimhall Library i...
06/06/2022

Tomorrow is our last group for the summer. Looking forward to seeing everyone there!

10:45-11:45am at Brimhall Library in Thousand Oaks

Another great reminder from Nicole Cruz registered dietician https://nicolecruzrd.com
06/02/2022

Another great reminder from Nicole Cruz registered dietician
https://nicolecruzrd.com

“Mommy, I want you to go swimming with me.”⁠

⁠Have you ever been asked this question and instead of jumping straight in the water, thought about your body? Your child might notice things about your body, but what’s really important is that they want you to be with them. They wants to spend time together. They want you to engage. They want to share experiences with you in this life.⁠

I know that society makes us believe we should be smaller, and our bodies should be flatter and harder.⁠

And our culture also makes it harder to live life in a larger body. I’m in no way trying to discount those sad and frustrating truths.⁠

But what I also know to be true, is that when we step back and think about our kids, those little humans that we likely value the most in this world, that we want to have the strongest and most loving relationships with, they don’t care.⁠

They want us to be present and engaged in life. They want us to share the food. They want to look back and have pictures with us in them. They want to snuggle into comfort and welcoming arms.⁠

They’re not interested in whether you have the *best* body or eat *right*. They just want you! ❤️

05/12/2022

The National Maternal Mental Health Hotline is now LIVE! The Hotline, funded by the U.S. Health Resources and Services Administration (HRSA) and operated by Postpartum Support International, is available 24/7, 365 days a year, in English or Spanish, and other languages by request. The Hotline is available for pregnancy, postpartum, and post-loss support. Call or text us anytime to connect with a Hotline counselor for confidential conversation, support, understanding, and resources. You do not need a diagnosis to reach out for help – we are here for you. 1-833-943-5746

We need to lead by example. Our children look to us on how to be. It’s okay to show them that we have emotions and we ma...
03/13/2022

We need to lead by example. Our children look to us on how to be. It’s okay to show them that we have emotions and we make mistakes.

It’s important to label our emotions for our children, “I’m sad and crying right now and I will be happy again soon”

08/21/2021
Conversations with Mom is returning to a weekly in person group for new moms (0-6 months) on Tuesday Sept 14th at the Th...
08/21/2021

Conversations with Mom is returning to a weekly in person group for new moms (0-6 months) on Tuesday Sept 14th at the Thousand Oaks Library. Seating is limited, so please register with the library in advance. More event details below including availability:

https://counselingconejovalley.com/conversations-with-mom/

For parents of teens:Dear Mom and Dad, Please stick with me. I can’t think clearly right now because there is a rather s...
07/12/2021

For parents of teens:

Dear Mom and Dad,

Please stick with me.

I can’t think clearly right now because there is a rather substantial section of my prefrontal cortex missing. It’s a fairly important chunk, something having to do with rational thought. You see, it won’t be fully developed until I’m about 25. And from where I sit, 25 seems a long way off.

But here's what i want my parents to know..

My brain is not yet fully developed

It doesn’t matter that I’m smart; even a perfect score on my math test doesn’t insulate me from the normal developmental stages that we all go through. Judgement and intelligence are two completely distinct things.

And, the same thing that makes my brain wonderfully flexible, creative and sponge-like also makes me impulsive. Not necessarily reckless or negligent but more impulsive than I will be later in life.

Please stick with me.

So when you look at me like I have ten heads after I’ve done something “stupid” or failed to do something “smart,” you’re not really helping.

You adults respond to situations with your prefrontal cortex (rationally) but I am more inclined to respond with my amygdala (emotionally). And when you ask, “What were you thinking?” the answer is I wasn’t, at least not in the way you are. You can blame me, or you can blame mother nature, but either way, it is what it is.

At this point in my life, I get that you love me, but my friends are my everything. Please understand that. Right now I choose my friends, but, don’t be fooled, I am watching you. Carefully.

Please stick with me.
......

Here’s what you can do for me

1. Model adulting.
I see all the behaviors that you are modeling and I hear all of the words you say. I may not listen but I do hear you. I seem impervious to your advice, like I’m wearing a Kevlar vest but your actions and words are penetrating. I promise. If you keep showing me the way, I will follow even if I detour many, many times before we reach our destination.

2. Let me figure things out for myself.

If you allow me to experience the consequences of my own actions I will learn from them. Please give me a little bit of leash and let me know that I can figure things out for myself. The more I do, the more confidence and resilience I will develop.

3. Tell me about you.

I want you to tell me all the stories of the crazy things you did as a teen, and what you learned from them. Then give me the space to do the same.

4. Help me with perspective.

Keep reminding me of the big picture. I will roll my eyes at you and make all kinds of grunt-like sounds. I will let you know in no uncertain terms that you can’t possibly understand any of what I’m going through. But I’m listening. I really am. It’s hard for me to see anything beyond the weeds that I am currently mired in. Help me scan out and focus on the long view. Remind me that this moment will pass.

5. Keep me safe.

Please remind me that drugs and driving don’t mix. Keep telling me that you will bail me out of any dangerous situation, no anger, no lectures, no questions asked. But also let me know over and over and over that you are there to listen, when I need you.

6. Be kind.

I will learn kindness from you and if you are relentless in your kindness to me, someday I will imitate that behavior. Don’t ever mock me, please and don’t be cruel. Humor me-I think I know everything. You probably did as well at my age. Let it go.

7. Show interest in the things I enjoy.

Some days I will choose to share my interests with you, and it will make me feel good if you validate those interests, by at least acting interested.

One day when the haze of adolescence lifts, you will find a confident, strong, competent, kind adult where a surly teenager once stood. In the meantime, buckle in for the ride.

and.. Please stick with me.

Love,

Your Teenager
....

By Helene Wingens
https://grownandflown.com/letter-from-teen-to-parents/

The things I do that you think are "crazy" are just me being a teen and going through normal stuff. Here are 7 things I want you to know.

06/20/2021

DEPRESSION TIPS

Shower. Not a bath, a shower. Use water as hot or cold as you like. You don’t even need to wash. Just get in under the water and let it run over you for a while. Sit on the floor if you gotta.

Moisturize everything. Use whatever lotion you like. Unscented? Dollar store lotion? Fancy 48 hour lotion that makes you smell like a field of wildflowers? Use whatever you want, and use it all over your entire dermis.

Put on clean, comfortable clothes.

Put on your favorite underwear. Cute black lacy panties? Those ridiculous boxers you bought last christmas with candy cane hearts on the butt? Put them on.

Drink cold water. Use ice. If you want, add some mint or lemon for an extra boost. I always use lemon.

Clean something. Doesn’t have to be anything big. Organize one drawer of a desk. Wash five dirty dishes. Do a load of laundry. Scrub the bathroom sink.

Blast music. Listen to something upbeat and dancey and loud, something that’s got lots of energy. Sing to it, dance to it, even if you suck at both.

Make food. Don’t just grab a granola bar to munch. Take the time and make food. Even if it’s ramen. Add something special to it, like a soft boiled egg or some veggies. Prepare food, it tastes way better, and you’ll feel like you accomplished something.

Make something. Write a short story or a poem, draw a picture, color a picture, fold origami, crochet or knit, sculpt something out of clay, anything artistic. Even if you don’t think you’re good at it. Create.

Go outside. Take a walk. Sit in the grass. Look at the clouds. Smell flowers. Put your hands in the dirt and feel the soil against your skin.

Call someone. Call a loved one, a friend, a family member, call a chat service if you have no one else to call. Talk to a stranger on the street. Have a conversation and listen to someone’s voice. If you can’t bring yourself to call, text or email or whatever, just have some social interaction with another person. Even if you don’t say much, listen to them. It helps.

Cuddle your pets if you have them/can cuddle them. Take pictures of them. Talk to them. Tell them how you feel, about your favorite movie, a new game coming out, anything.

May seem small or silly to some, but this list keeps people alive.

*** At your absolute best you won’t be good enough for the wrong people. But at your worst, you’ll still be worth it to the right ones. Remember that. Keep holding on.

*** In case nobody has told you today I love you and you are worth your weight and then some in gold, so be kind to yourself and most of all keep pushing on!!!!

Find something to be grateful for!

May I please get 2 friends or family members to copy and re-post? I am trying to demonstrate that someone is always listening.



1-800-273-8255

Just two. Any two.
Say done.
❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

**copied and pasted, feel free to do the same**

Excited to announce that Conversations with Mom will resume virtually on June 16 at 10-11:15am.  Prior registration is r...
06/04/2021

Excited to announce that Conversations with Mom will resume virtually on June 16 at 10-11:15am. Prior registration is required visit www.tolibrary.org/moms

Acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) Teaches skills to help us cope with difficult thoughts and feelings by “unhookin...
10/17/2020

Acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) Teaches skills to help us cope with difficult thoughts and feelings by “unhooking” from them.

Meme credit to one of my lovely clients.

Welcome My name is Kimberly Zevallos and I am a licensed Marriage and Family therapist with my psychotherapy office in Thousand Oaks, CA. I am passionate about working with clients to improve their relationships and ability to cope with life’s stressors. I believe that you have  many resources w...

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) teaches skills to help us cope with difficulty thoughts and emotions by “unhooki...
10/17/2020

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) teaches skills to help us cope with difficulty thoughts and emotions by “unhooking” when they are not helpful.

Meme credit to one of my lovely clients.

A wonderful group for pregnant and new moms.
08/22/2020

A wonderful group for pregnant and new moms.

I am so excited to co-facilitate this amazing group with Perinatal Mental Health Care. It has been great supporting new moms over telehealth and we will continue to do so for as long as it takes. We still have room in our upcoming September series. Please share with anyone you think might benefit.

07/27/2020
04/06/2020
04/06/2020
03/23/2020

Public Service Announcement.

Now is the time to reach out to a therapist. 

Some of us have open space that wasn’t available a week ago. If you need to just decompress, get your kid in for a few sessions work on your marriage.

Now is the time!

Now that most Americans are working from home you can’t say you don’t have time to work on yourself. Yes we are doing teletherapy, and it’s not face-to-face, but it’s just as good.

Insurance companies have approved it so there’s no need to worry about that. If you don’t have insurance and you would normally pay cash we have appointments for you too!

Being home for long periods of time with loved ones can create chaos and anxiety. Being by yourself can create depression. Now is the time to take care of her self. We are thinking about you too in our community.

Self-care is critical right now.

Please reach out if I can help, or help refer to you someone.

Feel free to share with others who need to hear this.

Tips on taking care of your mental health during this time:1. Separate what is in and what is not in your control2. Do w...
03/18/2020

Tips on taking care of your mental health during this time:

1. Separate what is in and what is not in your control

2. Do what helps you feel a sense of safety

3. Get outside in nature

4. Stay in the present

5. Stay connected and reach out if you need more support

https://afsp.org/taking-care-of-your-mental-health-in-the-face-of-uncertainty/

Taking Care of Your Mental Health in the Face of Uncertainty AFSP Share529.3KTweetShare By Doreen Marshall, Ph.D. Human beings like certainty. We are hard-wired to want to know what is happening when and to notice things that feel threatening to us. When things feel uncertain or when we don’t gene...

03/14/2020
This is a short video that provides tips to manage your anxiety during this time.  I hope it is helpful.
03/13/2020

This is a short video that provides tips to manage your anxiety during this time. I hope it is helpful.

You see the empty aisles at Target or Costco. You feel like you found gold if you can get your hands on some toilet paper, water, or hand sanitizer. You star...

Let’s try to listen this weekend!
12/14/2019

Let’s try to listen this weekend!

12/07/2019

My son climbed to the top of the monkey bars and snaked across them from above. He's not strong enough to...

Thank you Maara Fink. This is a great talk about  judging other parents. This is a huge problem that affects our confide...
12/06/2019

Thank you Maara Fink. This is a great talk about judging other parents. This is a huge problem that affects our confidence and increases guilt. Let’s focus on believing in ourselves and accepting others.

https://youtu.be/oc4y5nMKwi8

This talk was given at a local TEDx event, produced independently of the TED Conferences. A thoughtful professional, Maara is a career-woman and mother of fo...

11/17/2019

WORLD PREMATURITY DAY - 1 in 10 babies is born premature, Worldwide. Share your story & help spread awareness.
- www.preemieworld.com

Great way to model imperfection and repair
11/09/2019

Great way to model imperfection and repair

Moms with babies 0-6 months.  Come join us every Tuesday at the Thousand Oaks library for an intimate support group.   B...
10/22/2019

Moms with babies 0-6 months. Come join us every Tuesday at the Thousand Oaks library for an intimate support group. Bring your baby and meet other moms. The group runs 9-10:15 am and is free. No need to sign up.

Way to go CA!  A free mental health health hotline for non-emergencies. Please put it in your phone and share. https://b...
10/10/2019

Way to go CA! A free mental health health hotline for non-emergencies.

Please put it in your phone and share.

https://bit.ly/2LSNkKs

On Monday, California launched its first statewide mental health line in order to provide non-emergency emotional support for those struggling with mental and emotional well-being.

10/06/2019

"Play raises the level of creativity as it involves some element of imagination. Academic training should never be an excuse to not let children play as it takes away their opportunity to learn," says professor of psychology Dr Peter Gray.

Intimacy= safety
09/23/2019

Intimacy= safety

09/22/2019

To borrow a phrase: love works in mysterious ways. We are born to love and, as it turns out, love

❤️
09/14/2019

❤️

Address

145 Hodencamp
Thousand Oaks, CA
91301

Opening Hours

Monday 9am - 6pm
Tuesday 9am - 6pm
Wednesday 9am - 6pm
Thursday 9am - 6pm
Friday 9am - 6pm

Telephone

(805) 410-4541

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Comments

I'd like to share a rather unusual, free, aces prevention resource...parenting tips bumper stickers! Advancing Parenting, a Camarillo CA nonprofit, produces parenting tips bumper stickers and makes them available at no cost to businesses, organizations, clinics, schools, and individuals. There are fifty-one in a set and each bumper sticker communicates a parenting behavior or practice generally recognized as supporting the healthy development of children. Just one will be read thousands of times!

Bumper stickers are a unique and powerful way to educate everyone about parenting and prevent child abuse five, ten, twenty, fifty years down the road. At stoplights drivers and passengers point, smile, and nod. Conversations begin and often a phone is used to take a photo of the sticker right at the stoplight. Presumably, they are being shared on social media. It's wonderful to see!

Sets of the stickers can be put in holders and placed on counters and tables so folks can select one or more for their cars. Visit www.advancingparenting.org to order this free resource. Use a computer...our website is not optimized for phones. Please share.
Don't miss out on our workshop this Sunday!
Depression & Anxiety: What Every New Parent Needs to Know
Perinatal Mental Health Care and Counseling Conejo Valley will review risk factors for perinatal mood and anxiety disorders, describe ways to minimize risk and will focus on how to feel well and maintain wellness at this important stage of life. This workshop is for you if you are planning to get pregnant, are pregnant, have a new baby OR are a healthcare/wellness provider caring for families.

https://www.birchfamilybirthservices.com/classes/pmadworkshop
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