Vivian Morgan Counseling

10/16/2025

Experiencing and surviving abuse can have such a profound impact on a person’s mind, body, and soul. It’s never selfish to take time for yourself!

Remember, you are worthy of love.

10/15/2025

This makes me think of the brave women I work with every day, in groups and individually, who are recovering from the emotional abuse suffered from years of narcissistic treatment.

The day-to-day devaluation... lies, silent treatment, disempowerment, hiding finances, second guessing, criticism, and verbal put-downs... all designed to tilt the power and control in their direction.

And now, EYES WIDE OPEN, they realize that they held the power all along. That's why they needed to be kept down- they are warriors too strong for the cage they were supposed to be happy with.

💪 🩷

10/10/2025

Our thoughts are a portal to the problems we need to solve, or threats we need to heed.
When we can be aware, acknowledge, accept, and allow - these feelings can more easily move through us. And when they do, remind yourself....
I Am Safe Right Now.
I Can Manage Stress.
I Can Care For My Well-Being.
And the BIG one:
I CAN ASK FOR HELP.
I AM LOVABLE.
Frank Anderson tells us more here.

Most of us try to get rid of painful thoughts:
“I shouldn’t feel this way.”
“Stop overthinking.”
“Just move on.”

But here’s what neuroscience shows us—
the more you fight a thought, the louder your brain makes it.

That’s because your amygdala interprets that inner struggle as danger, and your prefrontal cortex—the part that helps you regulate—temporarily shuts down.

So instead of calming your mind, you end up reliving the same emotional loop.

Those thoughts that keep looping aren’t random.
Many were formed in moments when your brain was trying to protect you.

That’s why healing isn’t about forcing positive thoughts—it’s about changing how you relate to what arises inside you. When you meet a thought with curiosity instead of judgment, you send a powerful signal to your body: “I’m safe now.”

Your body doesn’t know the difference between an external threat and an internal one. So if you meet your thoughts with fear or frustration, your brain reads that as danger— and your amygdala, the part that scans for threat, amplifies the sense of threat.

But when you pause, breathe, and simply notice what’s happening—without trying to fix or silence it—your nervous system receives a different message.

The amygdala quiets.
The prefrontal cortex—responsible for reasoning, reflection, and choice—comes back online.
And that’s where neuroplasticity begins.

Your brain starts building new connections that link awareness with safety instead of threat. Over time, that repetition teaches your mind:

“I can think and feel difficult things without being in danger.”

That’s what true rewiring looks like—not controlling your thoughts, but creating safety inside your relationship with them.

So the next time an old thought shows up— “you’re not enough,” “something bad will happen,” “they’ll leave”— pause. Notice it. Soften your response.

You don’t have to believe it or banish it. You can simply get curious about it—maybe even listen to what it’s trying to protect.

That’s where healing begins.

09/24/2025

We may feel like something is off, words and actions feel cruel, like the intention is to hurt you, that we are not being treated fairly or kindly, no matter what we do.
This is very confusing in relationships where we expect love.

Emotional abuse is sneaky.
It doesn't show up in public. It doesn't show up in every relationship.
It can happen in families, in friendships, and at the workplace. And of course, in our intimate relationships.
We may talk about it, and others find it hard to understand. They just don't see it. So we stop talking about it. We stop complaining.

Which is exactly why we often feel unseen, devalued, and invisible.

I am offering a virtual group for women:
SURVIVING OUT LOUD! Recovery from Narcissistic or Emotional Abuse.
The group starts next Thursday and runs for 6 weeks.

No diagnosis is necessary, just a lived experience and a desire to learn and share. This is a good place for exploring and healing.

Click here to find out more - I have a few spots still open:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/12KfX0WRDnXFaJ9Bt5hAol-MCG9E_u_N5063ekwIk7-k/edit?usp=sharing

09/17/2025

We have the potential and power to create peace, moment to moment.

I have this vision for our future.

I see a world where we set social media aside, and instead we sit down for coffee with a friend we used to know. We come to the table with our suffering and our joys… with our experiences, our knowledge, our worldviews, and our beliefs. We don’t avoid the hard conversations, because we know how meaningful, how powerful, a genuine dialogue can be. We let each other speak. We listen to hear, and then we look for common ground. We hold the weight of each other’s words in the palms of our hands, cradling them tenderly, but also with the strength, the resolve, and the intention it takes to create systemic change.

I see a world where we lean into love.

We come together in search of solutions. We mostly seem to want the same things — like fulfillment and happiness, peace and safety for our children, accessible health care (for mind, spirit, and body alike), equity and abundance in every form, an appreciation for the planet we’ve been gifted, actual freedom, and the evidence that light and hope are in the lead.

I see an awareness that we’re here for a purpose, in this time and in this place, and I see us awakening to the truth of our nature — that we are inextricably, forever, connected.

I want us to extend compassion to everyone, even if we initially don’t think they “deserve” it. I see laughter that doesn’t mock, but instead rejoices. I see words used as tools, not as weapons. I see hearts opening, and minds expanding, and spirits taking flight with the help of the wind that once knocked them down, kept them grounded.

I see gratitude. I see kindness. I see a chance to get things right.

And I know some of you out there might not see this just yet. And you’re not without your reasons. They’re valid, and I’ve been there… so take up the space to just be where you are. I’ll hold it here until you’re ready. Then we’ll carry it forward, together.

At that point, anything will be possible.

09/16/2025

Our inner child lives with us. She's still carrying past unresolved pain, and shows up in moments where we need safety, understanding, peace, clarity, compassion and love.
We can be that love for ourselves.

What It Means

1. "The child within… doesn't disappear."

You can banish your emotions, but you cannot erase them. The child you left behind, the one who carried grief, anger, joy, or need, still lives in you. They hide in the shadows, waiting for your return.

2. "They grow into your fears, addictions, obsessions, and numbness."

Abandoned parts don't vanish; they adapt. They show up as anxiety, cravings, overwork, compulsions, or flatness. These aren't random symptoms; they're the cries of the exiled child still yearning for love and recognition.

3. "They are not your enemy."

The parts you resist, your fear, your addiction, your avoidance, are not here to destroy you. They're here to get your attention. They are signs, not threats.

4. "They are your key to aliveness, love, and Self."

The very child you abandoned carries the missing piece of your wholeness. When you return to them, witness, nurture, and integrate, you unlock vitality, intimacy, and freedom. The doorway to the Self is guarded by the parts you've feared most.

09/09/2025

When we focus on "our side of the fence", or things I can control, we are bringing energy back to ourselves and meeting our own needs.

Codependency focuses on the needs of others and neglecting our own, and this can lead to resentment and exhaustion.

AND...when you feel pulled to "fix" "rescue" or "take care of" someone who has the ability to do this for themselves you are stripping them of their agency.

Focus on you.
Ask for what you want and need.
Give when it serves the relationship and your own integrity.
Have your YES and have your NO.
Know where your boundaries lie.

09/04/2025

Survivors of narcissistic abuse have learned to ignore their own needs, their inner voice, and their own system of protection, in efforts to appease their abuser.

They've learned that if they ask for something, share an opinion, or try to discuss an issue, they are ignored, criticized, and blamed.

They become confused, then silent, then fearful. They learn to comply and silence that inner voice.

If this speaks to you, reach out. Your voice is important. Your experience is valid. You matter.

08/22/2025

May you find your way to a place that feeds your soul this weekend!