02/23/2026
"I am hurt watching a conversation centered around explaining Tourette’s rather than centering the impact on the men who were targeted. And I am very intentional with the use of “target” even if this wasn’t intentional, the harm was very real, and the harm is very much something that impacts a specific type of people: Black people. And no one else. But in this instance, it was even more targeted, towards the two Black men on stage at the time that word was shouted.
We can hold multiple truths: Tourette’s is real. And a racial slur landing on Black men in public is real harm.
Observing people be like “he didn’t mean it,” feels like they are ignoring the hurt. Like they are disappearing the harm. Our feelings come last when we are tasked with managing everyone else’s comfort. And that is fu***ng exhausting.
Especially for someone like me, being at the intersection of Black, disability, raising disabled children. I understand disability. I understand nuance.
And I am still fu***ng offended.
“If anyone was offended,” is bu****it. It’s distancing the impact from those who were hurt. It’s shifting the focus from “I am sorry this happened” to “ I am sorry you feel hurt.”
I am angry. And I am grieving.
I am grieving for myself. For Michael and Delroy. For my boys. Because in 2026, Black men can’t just stand on a damn stage without having to brace themselves for some s**t like this. I feel so much grief because their emotional experience is being buried in the coverage.
What would have been a proper response?
One that centers the harm. One that can acknowledge disability without weaponizing it as a shield. One that restored dignity to the people targeted, in this instance Michael B. Jordan and Delroy Lindo. One that involved reaching out to them.
Tourette’s can involve involuntary utterances. That is real. This I understand.
But disability explains behavior. It does not erase impact. Involuntary doesn’t mean harmless. Accountability and compassion can happen at the same time. Protecting disabled people should never excuse racial harm.
I know about neurological differences. I know about disability. I live this every single day. I have to advocate for nuance every single day. The world cannot use disability to override racial harm, it just cannot.
I am not rejecting disability.
I am rejecting the harm that occurred to be minimized.
I am not going to hold your hand during the rest of this, you either get it or you can go learn from someone else and not waste my time.
I am beyond tired of Black folk having to perform composure so white folk don’t feel uncomfortable about hurting us.
I had tears watching Michael and Delroy on that stage swallow that fu***ng hurt like that and carry on like the impeccable professionals that they are. But what they did on that stage was survival. That was fu***ng training. And we have been doing that s**t our whole lives. That was knowing the world was watching and understanding that any emotion shown outside of the ones they displayed would be misinterpreted. No, they couldn’t be angry then. They couldn’t be hurt then.
They had to absorb. Stay calm. Not escalate. Not “make it about race.” Protect everyone else from being uncomfortable.
Because that is what we have been trained to do. By this fu***ng world. And had to be taught by our families and our experiences.
I watched two men doing the work of containment. They couldn’t react. I watched two men go from professionals, guests, honorees, and then BAM! Targets. All in a matter of moments.
And there’s something so fu***ng painful about seeing Black people denied the space to be vulnerable in real time, especially when the weight of history is thrown at them.
Shouting the N-word while two Black men were on stage ain’t just fu***ng noise. That wasn’t just a fu***ng sound. That word carried generations of harm. Centuries of it.
And for white folk to pretend it was just some unfortunate word that just happened to fall out of someone’s mouth ignores the weight of what that word means.
The discussion around this, from white folk and white disabled folk, have been conversations that don’t just explain Tourette’s, they are telling us that because this person has Tourette’s the harm doesn’t really count like someone else saying it would.
And that is fu***ng bu****it.
Disability can explain behavior, but it would never erase the impact. And it should NEVER require the person harmed to suppress their feelings.
I ain’t asking for the person with Tourette’s to be punished. I am saying that there needs to be an acknowledgement of harm, and an acknowledgement of what that word means and what it carries. There should not be people using Tourette’s to avoid complex discussions about harm.
There was immediate understanding and care for the person who shouted the slur. There was a diluted care for the Black men who heard it. And what they are telling Black viewers is to “be understanding.”
And I am thinking, why is it always our job to be understanding?
The world struggles with intersectionality. I don’t. I live it. I know the complexity of our existence. So, when I have to watch white people turn our collective anger and grief into “don’t be offended, they couldn’t help it,” it pi**es me off. It’s emotionally dismissive. And actually, dishonest.
Let me leave you with this: disabled people deserve compassion, Black people deserve protection and acknowledgement, and neither should cancel the other."
thank you as always for your nuance 💚
