05/20/2022
Love this post💕
I have talked about my breastfeeding journey in various articles. It was not easy for me. In fact, looking back, I feel like I had an aversion to breastfeeding my first few children. I’m quite certain that I had DMER, even though I was never actually diagnosed. Even though I wanted to breastfeed and I wanted to be one of those moms who made it look easy, it just wasn’t. I felt like a prisoner to my child. I mean, I just carried you for 9 months, get off me!!
When I was pregnant with the twins, I began to pray specifically for a different breastfeeding experience. I wanted to love breastfeeding. But now I had two of these suckers…quite literally. And if I hadn’t been successful with one, how was I going to make it work with two?? So I just kept praying. I started really getting my head and heart ready by talking to Jesus about it AND talking to a friend who was a lactation consultant. Even though she lived many states away, she was a great cheerleader and really made me feel like I COULD do this.
Then the twins came. The pic below is the first memory I have after their birth. I was able to deliver Lucy naturally, but things got a little scary with Maggie and they had to do an emergency c-section. (Do not recommend. Zero stars.) After waking up in recovery, the first thing I wanted to do was nurse my babies. It was really a miracle moment in my life…a sweet breakthrough that I had prayed and prayed for.
For the next three months, I sat in a recliner, topless, feeding those babies. And I loved every minute of it. I put work to the side. I didn’t worry about emails. Everything in my life was put on pause so that I could build up my milk supply and just focus on these babies. I binged every season of Say Yes to the Dress, Fixer Upper and Forensic Files. I happily ate all of the protein balls that my mother-in-love made me to help boost my supply. We accepted all of the help from my parents to get the other kids where they needed to go. We truly relied on our little community.
I realize now that one of the reasons I hated breastfeeding so much and one of the reasons I was NOT successful in the past was because of the expectations I had put on myself. I had to keep up my work schedule and be at every event and answer every email and keep doing every little thing…and then be awesome at breastfeeding, too?? Well, it doesn’t work that way. Something has to give. Three days after I delivered Luke, I was at the Texas Capital with him…working. Of course I resented breastfeeding him. He was getting in my way! Of course I wasn’t successful. And maybe, in some way, that was everyone else’s expectation, too. “Oh Abby will be here. Nothing will slow her down.” But the bottom line was that I needed to slow down.
I’m writing all of this because of the current formula shortage. As a mama who has definitely utilized both breast milk and formula, there is no denying the fact that breast milk, when comparing the two, is superior to formula. And while I also believe a fed baby is best, I would love to see a sharp upward trend in breastfeeding. But we are going to have to take a look at ourselves in order to make that happen.
Women often choose formula because for MANY of us, breastfeeding is HARD. Telling a mom, “It was easy for me,” is not helping. What will help her is coming alongside of her and providing assistance during this transitional time. Could you help her with laundry? Could you bring dinner and just sit with her and binge her favorite shows with her? Could you come over and cuddle the baby for a few hours so she can get a good nap? I know so many women are living life as single moms and that is really tough. These women are often the ones who have to go back to work just a couple weeks after delivery. Awful. Could you and your friends pool some money so that she could take another one to two weeks off? Do a bake sale at your church to help raise money?
We are not meant to do life alone. We are meant to do it together, in community. My prayer has been that through this formula shortage, mamas would come together and figure out how to help each other. Let’s get creative to feed our babies and support each other. ❤️
