04/30/2026
I can’t believe I used to live here. I can’t believe that this is my life! 10 years ago I came out to California, and knew I needed to move here. Within months, I’d found a little home right on the beach. I moved across the country for a fresh start with two suitcases and my puppy Beau.
I’ve spent more mornings meditating and evenings watching the sunset in this very spot than I can count. This beach is one of my truest soul homes and where my deepest healing took place. Where my business was born and my first sound bath was held. It’s where I healed from heartbreak and heartache and learned a new experience of love. Sat for meetings and step work. Watched eclipses and howled at the moon. Summer swims at midnight and winter birthday celebrations at sunset. Where I got engaged. This is where almost every element of my life today came through. And I can’t believe that this year will be 5 years that I’ve been living on the other side of town! And yet, every time I’m back on this sand it still feels like home. I drop into stillness and my heart sings out in happy prayer.
Today was bittersweet however, as felt Beau’s presence so strongly and, with it, a deep grief for him, for the past, and for all that has changed these past 5 years. I could feel him sitting in my lap. Sensed him twirling in the sand, always by my side as he was for so many years. It’s been almost two years since he passed and some days I truly can’t believe he’s gone. Days like these I feel him with me more strongly than ever. I felt so aware of all the ways my life is so different today. This place that was the beginning of my fresh start, has become a memory from an older chapter now. And being there feels like home, but it no longer is.
It’s crazy how time passes and life changes. And then there are these moments which feel like anchor points that bring you back down memory lane.
The mantra that came to me today in several forms was the reminder that what’s meant to be will always be.
Humee hum brum hum
What’s meant to be already is
What’s meant for me won’t miss me
What’s meant for me is meant for me
Gods plan for your soul’s success is 100% guaranteed 🙏🏼