Crystal Lotus Counseling

11/27/2025

11/27/2025

The holidays are coming and boundaries might feel harder to set, but they're just as important. Here are some scripts you can use.

11/27/2025

11/27/2025

Becoming a cycle breaker looks like choosing love, honesty, and steady healing even when it feels unfamiliar. Every small shift creates space for a new kind of family story. You deserve that peace, and so do the people who come after you.

Grab your free sample download of The Mother Daughter Relationship Makeover Workbook for Lasting Change and start your next chapter today ➡️ https://reachoutrecovery.com/free-mother-daughter-download-2/

11/27/2025

This is how you maintain the bridge of connection between you and another person when they share their feelings with you...even when it's about you (or how they feel about your behavior).

You don't have to agree with what they're saying.
You don't immediately have to have a response.
You don't have to 'fix' anything in that moment.

But you do have to be willing to actually listen.
You do have to be present and not just wait for your turn to speak.
You do have to be willing to allow them to feel what they're feeling.

Things that help:
- acknowledging the feeling and making it safe for that feeling to exist.
- expressing appreciation for bringing their real feelings to you (it's hard for many people to do!)
- keeping the focus on them (not defending or explaining yourself straight away).
- staying on topic; don't immediate shift to all the things you've been thinking/been frustrated about. One issue at a time.
- asking questions to understand, NOT to poke holes or try to prove them wrong.
- giving them your full attention: maintaining eye contact and putting down distractions (phone, tv, etc).

This initial piece can change the trajectory of the conversation - are you a safe person to share feelings with?
Can you sit with discomfort?
Or do you immediately make it about you, defend yourself, or explain away your behavior?
Tag the best listener you know in the comments.

If you're working on learning how to hold space for both yourself and another in relationship, that's a big change! And registration for the 2026 cohorts of the Cycle Breakers program opens this Friday!
If you're looking for a community of likeminded folks looking to practice the skills needed to meet yourself and others with greater safety and attunement, I would highly recommend checking it out!
More to come soon and space is very limited, but feel free to sign up below for more info:
https://theeqschool.myflodesk.com/cbjan2026

11/27/2025

The way we show up in ordinary moments becomes the story our children tell themselves about love.

11/27/2025

Let’s not keep repeating the cycles that got us here.

Sending so much love to all the cycle breakers who are making changes and refusing to accept the harmful treatment that was the norm in so many of our families.

11/27/2025

11/27/2025

So many parents tell me, “We tried a consequence… but nothing changed.”
And often, the missing piece is reflection.

Reflection is where a child makes sense of what happened, understands their feelings, recognises the impact, and learns what to do differently next time.
Without it, consequences become isolated events — not learning moments.

If you’re not building reflection into your approach, you may be missing out on the most powerful opportunity for behaviour change.

My Managing Big Feelings Toolkit includes reflection sheets, conversation prompts, and brain-based explainers to help you guide these moments calmly and effectively. Find it via the link in comments below ⬇️ or via Linktree Shop in Bio.

Follow along — I’ve got more posts coming this week on reflection, repair, and consequences you won’t want to miss.

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11/27/2025

Are you getting ready to go home to a less-than-supportive family of origin for the Thanksgiving holiday?
Remember Setting boundaries is the ultimate form of self-respect.
A healthy boundary says, “I value myself enough to choose what I allow in.”
It’s about honoring your limits; not keeping everyone happy.