Rose-Colored Doula

03/07/2023

“I Won’t Hold Your Baby

…unless you ask me to, in which case, I will snuggle and cuddle your baby as much as you want me to.

I never ask my clients if I can hold their baby. In fact, I rarely ever touch my client’s baby if I can help it. Sounds sort of like the opposite of what you might picture of a doula, right? We must all be birth crazy, baby obsessed women who just want to cover babies in kisses and love and get an emotional high from attending births?

Not this doula.

I LOVE attending births. Call me crazy, but getting those middle of the night calls is one of my favorite parts of this job. I get to listen to someone at their most vulnerable times - the excitement, the hesitation, the nervousness of the unknown. Being able to provide some comfort, reassurance and continuity of care to the people I work with is so important to me (and them!)

Rushing off in the night, quietly getting myself ready, getting in the car and heading off to their home or hospital makes me feel like I’m on a secret birth mission that nobody around me knows about. When I arrive I fall as seamlessly as I can into the rhythm of the birth and start supporting my clients in whatever way they need most.

When the baby arrives I step aside and leave room for the new parents to discover their baby. I try and grab some photos (I’m not a birth photographer though, so keep your expectations in check!) and then I only step in if my client needs me for some reason.

Why does that matter? Why won’t I ask to hold your baby? Simply because: they are yours, not mine. I want you to be able to hold your baby as close as you want, for as long as you want without anyone interrupting that time. There will be enough people coming along in the next few hours and weeks who need to take that baby out of your arms for whatever reason, and tons of friends and family who will offer help by “holding the baby”.

Instead, I want to hold you, whether that’s in my arms, in my heart or my thoughts. By supporting and “holding” you, I don’t need to hold your baby. But if you ask me to, I would LOVE to.”

Written by

02/24/2023

Just a little gift for a special postpartum client. ❤️

What does a postpartum visit include?
-We’ll go over any baby care questions you have as well as…
-Any care tips that you need for yourself during your recovery from birth.
-We’ll discuss baby feeding and any referrals you might need if you chose to breastfeed.
-We’ll discuss any questions you had about your birthing experience.
-If needed, I will hold your baby while you nap or…
-Complete looming household chores for you.

The postpartum visit is all about helping you adjust to having a newborn in your home! The ball is in your court for this visit and your specific needs are addressed to help make this transition into parenthood as smooth as possible.

02/22/2023

Hi! I’m Mary, the Rose-Colored Doula. I strive to help my clients see birth and child-rearing through a positive lens. In a world where most people fear birth, I like to help my clients see it positively and minimize negative interactions during their birth experience.

I’m a mother of three and twice certified doula through and . I’ve had three different birth experiences myself, including use of the epidural as well as entirely unmedicated childbirth. My ideal birth to attend is a birth where the mother gets exactly what she is looking for, whether that’s an elective cesarean delivery, use of the epidural, or medication-free in their own home.

Currently serving families in Northern New York.

12/31/2022

And no, I'm not proud of it.

I didn't WANT to flush but no one prepared me for what a miscarriage at 7 weeks would look like. Because I didn't know what it would look like, I felt blindsided by the feeling of my pregnancy leaving my body.

No one talks about this stuff therefore it's morbid, horrible, gruesome, uncomfortable.

No one talks about how many miscarriages happen on the toilet because the feeling of pressure is so harsh and confusing that we instinctively run to the bathroom.

One aspect of coping with both of my miscarriages was processing WHERE my babies were. The first baby was flushed at home while my second baby was flushed at the hospital emergency room.

I was traumatized by both births and continue to struggle with the trauma responses that have developed within my mind.

But... I flushed.

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I had a post where I discussed "flushing" earlier this year and it was the most interacted with post that I had. It was validating for me but I know that many of you felt less alone because you saw how many people also flushed the toilet. Of course there are people who do not understand and judge this act but until someone is in your shoes, they cannot possibly understand the difficult decisions that you have to make. Never, ever, ever feel ashamed of flushing the toilet. What happened to you was scary, horrible, traumatic, and we did what felt was best in the moment.

I see you.

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12/06/2022

11/08/2022

What can I offer you as an SBD doula?

Here is a list of just a few services that are specific to my training through stillbirthday.com.

09/02/2022

Something absolutely beautiful that the sweet soul at Unbridled Mama Doula Services did ❤️

04/19/2022

Stunning birth photography

Useful Information for Hobby and Professional Photographers.

04/17/2022