My People Patterns

09/02/2025

If anyone’s looking for a refresher on Structural Family Systems, I have an online course and a coupon for you. I’m a recovering Clinical Director of an adolescent treatment center and built an entire program around family systems - all my thoughts, theory and interventions in one place - $59.99 but use the code SEPTEMBER for a cheeky 15% discount - myPeoplePatterns.com https://www.mypeoplepatterns.com/offers/B2rekjch...

06/05/2025

If only I had created this framework for understanding anxiety when i was running treatment centers for teens - i'd have had SO much fun with this!

If you're wanting help understanding anxiety for teens, let me introduce you to the anxiety demon - it's the part of anxiety that has tricked you into worry ...

06/03/2025

Can you guess which of these 4 triggers is behind your latest spiral?

Dealing With Anxiety Triggers and understanding and managing the four core types of triggers - and the theme that connects them all. I address the common and...

05/28/2025

Worry is not actually the solution, but anxiety makes you think that it is. It’s one of the ten rules of anxiety that keeps you anxious, hypervigilant and ‘stewing’ in your thoughts and not ‘doing’ anything about the problem. Find out more about the ten rules of anxiety: link is in the bio

03/10/2025

How I think about anxiety in my private practice

Here's my break down of anxiety therapy to help you learn how to stop worrying and overthinking. I'll explain the paradox of worry and how overthinking can a...

08/31/2024

🦌 Say hello to the Deer: Nurturing, open, and always ready to connect. In our two-axis matrix, the Deer occupies the Indirect and Open quadrant, bringing a warm, supportive energy to every relationship. Deers value deep connections and take their time to build trust. They might be cautious, but they’re expressive, often going out of their way to ensure others feel understood and cared for. If you’re a Deer, your gentle approach and strong relational focus are what make you so special.

08/29/2024

🦉 Meet the Owl: Thoughtful, reserved, and quietly powerful. In our two-axis matrix, we explore how communication styles vary between being open or reserved and direct or indirect. The Owl represents the Indirect and Reserved quadrant—where deep thinkers reside. Owls are cautious, preferring to stay in the background and avoid the spotlight. They communicate subtly, often holding back personal information until they feel secure. If you’re an Owl, you know the power of observation and the value of a well-thought-out word.

08/22/2024

Tossing means something else where I come from, but was still happy to contribute to the HuffPost 🤯

08/16/2024

dating this type of an emotionally immature adult can start off great, with them being fun, outgoing, and exciting. However, when you try to go deeper in the relationship, they become evasive, changing the subject or even becoming dissociative. They prefer to keep things at a surface level and avoid deeper emotional intimacy.

08/12/2024

Dealing with the ‘Blamer’ in Relationships. We discuss the ‘Blamer’ - one of four types of emotionally immature adults that a therapist has encountered. Blamers are argumentative, manipulative, defensive, and evasive. If you express any annoyance to a Blamer, they will turn it around and blame you for unrelated issues, causing you to end up apologizing for things you didn’t do. The original issue gets lost in a sea of accusations.

08/11/2024

Dating the personalized is a bit of a minefield. They are super sensitive and take things way too personally. We talk about the characteristics of emotionally immature people, such as being self-attentive, lacking empathy, not taking responsibility, blaming others, being isolative, and having a very subjective worldview. If your partner exhibits two or more of these traits, they may be considered a ‘tiv’ - someone who is emotionally immature.

08/01/2024

What’s your communication style? When you look at their communication styles through this framework, it’s a miracle Rachel and Ross got together.