Austin Relationship Repair Shop

06/06/2025

How is everyone doing in these stressful times? Research says when there is such chaos and unpredictability, the following mental health difficulties increase: depression, anxiety, substance abuse, financial difficulties, crimes of desperation, break down in being able to resolve differences as fear increase the escalation of anger, family violence toward spouses and children, problems in school for kids if parents have any of the above issues. That's just the beginning. I encourage all who notice a decrease in functioning of yourself or any family members to find mental health help quickly. The longer you wait the worse problems become! Many cities have low cost mental health services if you are having financial difficulties. Professional help is life saving. Blessings to all of you!

05/26/2025

My therapist buddy, Simon Niblock in Austin, Texas, is a FABULOUS therapist for men. Here is his latest terrific article for men--teaches you what a real relationship looks like. Check it out, as well as other articles on his blog. Enjoy and learn!

What does a healthy relationship actually look like for men? In this honest and practical guide, you'll learn how emotional strength, secure attachment, respectful communication, and mutual growth form the foundation of real love. Perfect for men ready to build lasting, mature connections - without

04/22/2025

In this unprecedented, scary world, it is extremely difficult to stay centered and calm. Limbic system brain (the part we share with the crocodiles) tells us "danger, danger" and that part of the brain looks for something that is threatening. That part of the brain operates 8 times faster than your calm, rational brain! It's about survival. When threats are everywhere, we are in a constant state of self-protection. Fear is running the show! Attacks, unbelievable lies, deceit, disrespect, dishonesty and deliberate manipulation are surrounding us and decimating our sense of safety and stability. Remember this: you leave nothing at the end of your life but the relationships you have built. Nothing. Be kind to others (but don't allow abuse!) Stop beating yourself up for your powerlessness, and focus on how to do mindfulness-type exercises--try the CALM app; listen to calming podcasts (produced by people you trust--that is most important); focus on self-care first so you have the energy to help others. Soothe and center yourself with healthy (not destructive) escapes. Destructive escapes? alcohol & drugs, shopping too much; p**n; affairs; video games endlessly; too much fluffy TV; spending all your time on social media--you name it--addictions are everywhere. They always make things worse after the "feel better" moments!

Then take the time to tell the people you love how much you love them; ask them how you can help them and ask for help yourself! Try a phone call or Facetime instead of text or email. Try to connect with your voice and face. Let them see your eyes--it truly is the window to the soul! That is what true community is about. Isolation does a number on our self esteem as well as our spirits. Cultivate connection--get professional help to do that if you don't know how!

When others get defensive, that means they have been nailed! There is no reason to defend ourselves if there is no threat. So when you know someone is being dishonest, deceitful, lying, manipulating--see how they respond to someone giving them feedback. If they immediately get defensive or defend themselves even more, it means there is at least a thread of truth in what they are being accused of and their alligator brain is protecting them from facing the truth! That's the "lie tell" you need to look for! When you confront, be calm and direct; if you angrily attack you invite the other person's alligator brain to fight back! Understand that fear runs the show when people are defensive! When people are defensive, they are incapable of listening to understand. Rational thought and connection resides in the frontal lobe--behind the forehead. Alligator brain is at the base of the neck! If people begin to escalate, stop, take a break and say "let's try again when we both are calm" and walk away. Don't keep pushing--it will not work!

I hope that anyone reading this can be encouraged to work only on controlling your own self, not others. It's hard enough to control ourselves, much less others. But control of others is what's going on when people in power crush others and don't care about the consequences to others. Take care of yourself; then help those you love. With care and concern, Dr. Pam

04/04/2025

My personal facebook has disappeared. So I have no idea what is happening!

03/04/2025

Do you have a child who is struggling with autism or any other neurodiversity issues and you can't find help for those kids? Look no further--here is a wonderful, new place called Abbys Learning Center in central Austin that will turn around the struggles in you and your child's life! Tehila Spigel, a good friend, has a daughter Abby, who was nonverbal for years. One therapist she tried told her to ignore her daughter until she said the word "mommy." That is cruel and ignorant. After trying many therapists. Tehila found Dr. Jessica Franco, a Behavior Analyst, Speech-Language Pathologist and University Professor. The changes in Abby were remarkable! Together these two women have created Abby's Learning Center--here's the URL: https://www.abbyscenter.com/center

Ribbon cutting was last week; it has a big parking lot at 510 W. 15th so no trouble going there. As it states on their bags: "Autism is not a disability, but an ability to change the minds of the ordinary." Share with everyone you know!

01/26/2025

Dr. Pam will offer online therapy only after 3/1/25. Visit before February ends!

Email from Dr Monday You don't want to miss this.     A Heartfelt Transition Announcement from Dr. Pam   THERAPY, SUPPORT, CONNECTION, WELL-BEING, RELATIONSHIP ENHANCEMENT Thank you for your presence

01/15/2025

Hello all--I am so bad about posting on social media, and yet several of you come and look and you get..nada! Alas I did not grow up with knowing about social media posting, and it is overwhelming! I wanted you to know that effective the end of February, 2025, I will be doing virtual appointments only. That is my way of semi-retiring, but still being available for those wonderful clients who want my help! Thanks to all of you, friends, clients, and shoppers, who have taken the time to visit this page, even when I didn't deliver! It has been an honor to serve the individuals, couples and families who have allowed me to enter their personal lives in the desire for growth and change. I honor and respect each one of you! I will be available and in my office until the end of February, so feel free to give me a call or send me an email. All of that information is on my website:
http://drmonday.com. Blessings to all of you!

Austin marriage & couples counseling. Certified Imago Relationship Therapist, Dr. Monday, helps repair conflicts getting you back on the road to happiness.

11/04/2024

Have you voted? I want to talk about AI generated videos and misinformation on social media. Recently, a report generated by AI said that smoking 2 or 3 ci******es a day are good for pregnant women. Did you know that doctors told women that in the 50's?? Anything that's ever been printed or put online or any kind of social media in the entire history of man is available by AI generated platforms. AI can and does pick up on anything related to the topic people put in there. It can't decide if it is true or not. So please please fact check anything you see. The bad actors--Russia, Iran, China--are producing AI generated fake emails, texts and videos to scare you. PLEASE PLEASE FACTCHECK before passing on anything that "supports" your view of things! Use snopes.com or politifact.com--both non-profit, non-partisan platforms that can tell you the TRUTH before you pass it on. If you don't factcheck, you are responsible for the spread of lies and misinformation, designed to make American citizens fight with each other. A house divided cannot stand, and the bad actors want that!

11/26/2022

https://conta.cc/3U8jpOb

You don't want to miss this. HOLIDAYS AND FAMILIES: BLESSINGS OR BURDENS? It's that time of year again. We all want that ideal, wonderful time with the people we love. What to do if we don't like some

09/18/2021

https://conta.cc/3lByIQf

More helpful resources Hello all I hope that each of you are well, and that you are trying to recover from the traumatic events of the last year and a half. This newsletter has vital information about

04/01/2020

Families are experiencing the stresses of enforced togetherness, isolation from others, financial stress, total disruption of routines, and fear of the unknowns of a pandemic. Our anxieties and fears often show up as anger directed at those around us. Couples' relationships are being strained at an increasing rate. Here is a really good article from The Times to help you with ideas of how to reduce relational stress:
https://time.com/5811146/coronavirus-married-relationship/?mc_cid=27ad22bf63&mc_eid=d208e19fd6

Married couples therapists on living and working in the same space

03/15/2020

So many people are afraid right now. Panic comes from irrational fears and the resulting self-absorption results in hoarding behavior. Buy enough for you and your family to have for two weeks, if there is any reason to believe you might be exposed and choose to self-quarantine.
Everything people are hoarding does not come from overseas; we make it all right here in the USA and we'll continue to do so! You will get your stuff--stop being greedy. If you socially isolate please stay in contact with friends and family via phone calls, email, texting or FaceTime. Adult children, call your elderly parents often just to check in to let them know you are thinking of them. Reassure each other that this crisis, too, will pass. Take reasonable precautions but don't freak out!

I have researched many articles written by credible scientists and medical personnel. The people who are already health-compromised are the ones most likely to have serious problems. For the vast majority of people, the coronavirus causes only mild or moderate symptoms, such as fever and cough. Reasonable caution is always best. The stress hormone cortisol is dumped into the bloodstream when we are afraid. That lowers the immune system functioning, so the more stress and fear, the more likely you are to get any kind of virus or bacterial infection. So use mindfulness, calming techniques, relax outdoors, chill, chill, chill. Health and wellness to all of you!