01/31/2024
It's common to view children as "going through a phase" when they exhibit certain behaviors throughout their development. Yet this contextual acceptance of behavior change is not as readily applied to adults through THEIR development. Perhaps if we applied the same grace to adults as we do to children as they're learning to become who they are, we would have a lot more compassion for each other and ourselves.
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The gift of going through a phase is that you are learning or unlearning something new. It has purpose.
We are all almost always in the process of learning something new, developing an underused (or previously unknown to us) ability or talent, or toning down an overused one that may have served us in a previous phase but no longer serves us in our growth; perhaps a phase comes about when we recognize that some of our automatic thinking or coping skills could be contributors to stress, conflict, or feelings of being stuck.
In the process of becoming, we are developing awareness of and working with our parts, and we all have so many parts. They came into being to help protect our vulnerable selves.
In this process of growth, there might be some overcompensating for a part that was suppressed in our life, and the swinging of the pendulum from under-use to overuse serves to bring that quality into balance.
Understanding what’s happening is a useful tool that helps us to be patient with the process of becoming more balanced, wiser, peaceful beings.
