Menije Boduryan, Psy.D.

Menije Boduryan, Psy.D. I give tips on how high-achieving women can overcome perfectionism
📍Woodland Hills, CA (psy26351)

Perfectionism University - A place where you can unlearn Perfectionism and start your journey of embracing imperfections and owning your enoughness.

💥Perfectionism is not the same thing as doing your best! At its core, Perfectionism is having unrealistically high expec...
04/24/2026

💥Perfectionism is not the same thing as doing your best! At its core, Perfectionism is having unrealistically high expectations of yourself that are either unattainable or unsustainable.

While your perfectionism has you focused on perfect outcomes and top-notch performances, it is driven by something deep inside of you: your inner critic. Because underneath the perfect appearance lies self-doubt, inner critic, and low self-esteem.

By expecting yourself ot never make a mistake, you falsely believe you can prove your competence.
By expecting yourself to meet everyone's expectations, you mistakenly believe you can find validation.
By expecting yourself to do everything perfectly, you falsely believe you will feel good enough.
By expecting yourself to always feel motivated and in control, you falsely believe your life will feel fulfilling.
By expecting yourself to keep going, no matter how tired you are, you think you will finally get to the finish line.

Your expectations of yourself keep you stuck, not free.

💫When will you stop normalizing these expectations and show up more authentically?

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04/23/2026

to March 2020—when our lives changed in ways we could have never imagined.

Back then, I shared how we can’t let social distancing turn into social disconnection.

And now, years later, that message still rings true.

Because when fear and anxiety show up, they don’t just go away.
They shape how we think.
They pull us into black-and-white thinking—
I’m either doing enough or I’m failing.
I’m either okay or everything is wrong.

And this is where dialectical thinking becomes so important.

Learning to hold both:
I can be struggling and still be okay.
I can make mistakes and still be enough.
I can grow and accept myself as I am.

Perfectionism and anxiety push us toward extremes.
But healing happens in the middle.

Maybe the goal isn’t to get it “right”…
but to learn how to hold space for both.

Does this still resonate for you today?

04/19/2026

The little me would be proud of me.

I didn’t become a psychologist to “fix” people or to have all the answers. Because the truth is—you are the one who does the work.

But it is an honor to walk beside you as we all go through this thing called life…
with its pain and its rewards,
its challenges and adventures,
its wins and its losses,
its connections and its rejections.

And so much of that journey is unlearning the belief that you have to do it all perfectly.
That you have to earn your worth.
That you have to get everything right to feel enough.

In this journey, the goal isn’t always to be happy.
It’s to meet yourself where you are.
To be loving and compassionate with yourself.
To keep coming back to inner peace and gratitude.

And that, more than anything, is what makes this work so meaningful.

Perfectionists don’t normalize these habits because it seems healthy or appropriate. They normalize them because, at som...
04/18/2026

Perfectionists don’t normalize these habits because it seems healthy or appropriate. They normalize them because, at some point, they worked.⁠
⁠
Being productive got you praise; rest became secondary.⁠
Being responsible made you feel safe; delegating or asking for help became threatening. ⁠
Being “on top of everything” gave you a sense of control and security; comparing your progress to others was the only way to validate yourself.⁠
Apologizing excessively gave you a false sense of connection.⁠
⁠
🤓Here is what you learned: if I do more, better, stay ahead, and dont make any mistakes, I will feel love, connection, belonging, and safety. ⁠
⁠
These habits became your new normal. 💥What once felt like effort now feels like the minimum.⁠
⁠
When did overworking, overthinking, and overextending start to feel normal?⁠
⁠
Especially when 'normal' isn't healthy.⁠
⁠
You’re allowed to question what you’ve been calling “normal.”⁠
⁠
⁠

Perfectionism doesn’t just show up in what you do.It shows up in how you think.These thoughts can promote responsibility...
04/17/2026

Perfectionism doesn’t just show up in what you do.
It shows up in how you think.

These thoughts can promote responsibility, appear motivating, and even be necessary at times. But over time, they create pressure, anxiety, and the constant feeling that you’re not doing enough.

When you believe in these thoughts, you end up raising the bar, keep pushing, and expecting more of yourself. and ultimately delaying rest and being present.

Because your mind has learned that your worth is tied to how much you do.

But these thoughts aren’t facts. They’re patterns.
And patterns can be questioned. They can be softened. They can change.

But it all starts with knowing that just because a thought feels true… doesn’t mean it’s helpful. ⭐

⁠
⁠

Perfectionism often looks like high standards.But underneath, it’s usually fear.Fear of making mistakes.Fear of being ju...
04/16/2026

Perfectionism often looks like high standards.
But underneath, it’s usually fear.

Fear of making mistakes.
Fear of being judged.
Fear of not being enough.

So you wait. Overthink. Avoid. Push yourself harder.

But this isn’t helping you move forward—
it’s keeping you stuck.

You don’t need more pressure.
You need more self-trust.

⁠

When the only thing Perfectionists believe is, "I am how well I do things," life is only measured by the tasks we comple...
04/15/2026

When the only thing Perfectionists believe is, "I am how well I do things," life is only measured by the tasks we completed, goals we pursued, and demands we have fulfilled.

In the midst of this race that never has a finish line, you lose a sense of meaning and purpose.

Because only when you slow down, which is extremely hard for the perfectionist, do you look around to appreciate what you have, enjoy what you have created, and be present in what you have built.

Toxic multitasking that perfectionists normalize:Perfectionism thrives on efficiency and productivity.It turns one task ...
04/14/2026

Toxic multitasking that perfectionists normalize:

Perfectionism thrives on efficiency and productivity.
It turns one task into multiple.

It says, "Why do one thing when you can do two or three and 'get ahead'?

It convinces you that your day is only as good as how much you accomplish. So you try to do more, fit more, be more—every moment of the day.

This is what it can look like:
• Turning a walk into “productive time” with a podcast
• Taking calls while driving instead of pausing
• Answering emails during meals
• Being with loved ones but mentally reviewing your to-do list
• “Resting” while planning your next task

And then you wonder why a simple walk, a quiet lunch, or a drive home feels more exhausting than it should.

Maybe the answer isn’t doing more.
Maybe it’s doing one thing at a time.

Single-tasking isn’t unproductive—it’s grounding.
It reduces the pressure you carry throughout the day.

And slowly, it helps you rewrite the narrative:
Your life is not measured by how much you accomplish…
But by how present you allow yourself to be.

⁠
⁠

04/10/2026

There, I said it.�Therapists aren’t trying to be influencers.

We’re showing up here because we want accurate mental health information to be shared. And if people are going to be learning from these platforms, then evidence-based voices need to be part of the conversation.

So yes, we film reels between sessions. We simplify complex concepts. We repeat what matters.

Not for likes or clicks—but to increase access, reduce stigma, and help people recognize when it’s time to seek real support.

Because good information shouldn’t be hard to find.

💚

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21031 Ventura Boulevard, Suite 316
Woodland Hills, CA
91364

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+18185756148

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