08/20/2025                                                                            
                                    
                                                                            
                                            Here’s to the pivot…..
My goodness does the universe have a way of slowing you down and have you reevaluate everything.  
I’ve been working the microdose pivot graciously, I thought.  I’ve been walking away from those who I don’t feel safe with. The constant what’s in it for me mentally had to be cut loose.  There is no reason to steal because if I could, I would give you the world.  
But then there comes the time in healing when you are all alone with all your feelings and unpacking all the feels…..  and the silence is deafening and you can’t unhear it.   And you realize that your purpose is so much more.  And you sit alone for days and mediate, and play your favorite sound bowls and you hydrate and you cry like you’ve never cried as an adult.  And while it’s just me in this beautiful space, there is more energy than I can explain…. And it’s beautiful, but terrifying at the same time.
The past few days have been extremely long and emotional, but so necessary for so many reasons.  I’ve worked extremely hard to be at this exact spot to heal and release the toxicity and negativity that has been trying to hang on for years.  In essence, I’m mourning a version of myself that is no more. 
So when you see this girl next and she looks a bit different, please know that she worked hard on her pivot. It wasn’t easy. It isn’t easy.  But you know when it’s time to shake the negative bu****it from your life.  But I’m shaking it.  I’m integrating the earth’s medicine to become the best version for not only me, but for my loved ones and my community that depends on me.  
Over the last couple days, a couple people have stopped by and have been caught off guard by my emotion and my tears. I just want to say, it’s ok….   I’m ok…….  Back in the day I would’ve opened a bottle of wine or three and numbed all these feelings and we all would’ve pretended everything was OK.   Trust me, I’m better than ok.  Clear headed, kind hearted, giving, loving and sober.  So feeling all these raw feelings may be scary for some, but it’s just part of the integration process.  
It’s a hell of a pivot for sure.  🍄🟫 😘