Triune C - Counseling, Consulting and Coaching

Triune C - Counseling, Consulting and Coaching 1) Be Prepared because Life is Difficult
2) Difficulties are Opportunities
3) Opportunities Lost Breeds Relapse Life is Difficult...Be Prepared!

Whether as a therapist, pastor, or coach, or as a or as a servant, leader, or mentor, or as a husband, father, or friend, if there is one thing that life has taught me, it is that life is difficult. The front row seat I’ve been given over nearly thirty years in the helping professions has taught me that:

1) Life is Difficult
2) Difficulties are Opportunities
3) Opportunities Lost Breeds Relapse

Whether helping an individual embrace hope, a family and marriage reconcile, a pastor and congregation revitalize, or a manager and team prosper, the adventure has been challenging, fascinating and fruitful. When I served families and youth who’ve been through nightmares that cause our heads to hang in disbelief, I learned how imperative it is to have hope, perseverance, and unconditional, nonjudgmental love. When I was in the midst of intellectual giants at Princeton Theological Seminary, I learned the difference between the Greek concept of education, which is growing in knowledge, and the Hebrew concept, which is growing in application of knowledge. When I served several churches, all of which had marked success despite trends to the contrary and the fact that they move excruciatingly slow, I learned that courage, integrity and character are vital leadership. When I served the Pittsburgh Leadership Foundation I spent more time on the top floors of downtowns tallest buildings than in my office. It became clear that those who’ve achieved the kind success dreams are made of were not immune to the loneliness, emotional pain, and despair of humankinds darkest hours. All of this (My graduate or professional and life education) has gifted me with the ability to have compassion on the deepest most intimate levels for understand, to engage, the common thread of our lives. Whether it’s our dreams or nightmares, our goals or apathies, our successes or breakdowns, this we know, the sooner we release the bad, the sooner we can build on the good, the sooner we can replicate it and spread it to others, and the sooner we remove the bandages from our wounds, the sooner we can get back in the game and smile that contagious smile again and again, and again. As a high profile individual you require the highest levels of confidentiality, efficiency and intimacy; Triune C meets these needs through Video Conferencing meetings, which are exclusively private, scientifically validated, and relationally detailed. No longer do you have to sneak out over your lunch break, rush across town, and worry about being seen. Wherever you are, your office, your home, a hotel, we will meet your counseling, consulting or coaching needs in the comfort and convenience of your personal environment. Please make the time to check us out. We look forward to working with you. Triune C Video Conferencing Can Benefit You If:
-You are a CEO, Doctor, Lawyer,… who Needs Total Anonymity.
-You are a Celebrity, Politician, High Profile individual, who Requires Privacy.
-You are an On The Rise Senior Exec, VP, Professor,… whose time is too valuable to spend 15 minutes driving to and from a meeting.
-You want Fast, Convenient, Flexible and Discreet Availability.
-You Can’t Wait for Weeks for an Appointment.
-You Live in a Rural Area.
-You Can’t Drive and Don’t have Transportation to an Office.
-You Want to Talk Privately in your Home, Car, Park, Office….
-You Don’t Have Childcare.
-You are Differently-Abled.
-You Are Homebound.
-You Want Something That Works.

03/22/2026
“Sit at the table where they talk about God, ideas, growth, dreams, and goals—not people.” — TobyMacChoose conversations...
03/21/2026

“Sit at the table where they talk about God, ideas, growth, dreams, and goals—not people.” — TobyMac

Choose conversations that nourish your soul and stretch your spirit. The right table changes everything.

For all my teaching colleagues out there:"He was fired for teaching a poem. What he discovered in that classroom became ...
03/21/2026

For all my teaching colleagues out there:

"He was fired for teaching a poem. What he discovered in that classroom became a 60-year fight for the children America keeps forgetting."

Jonathan Kozol was twenty-eight when he stepped into a Boston fourth-grade classroom in 1964, and quickly realized that the system had already abandoned half the children in front of him.

He could have chosen a more comfortable path. He was a Rhodes Scholar. He had studied literature at Harvard and could have built a career far removed from the overcrowded classrooms and peeling paint of urban schools.

Instead, he became a substitute teacher in one of Boston’s most neglected schools.

What he saw there changed everything.

Textbooks falling apart, classes crammed into storage closets, and children divided into low-level groups based on their neighborhoods, income, and skin color—labeled long before they had a chance to show who they really were.

One day, Kozol taught poetry by Black authors to his students. A small act born from his belief that these children deserved more—beauty, complexity, and truth.

The school fired him for it.

He had deviated from the approved curriculum. The message was clear: Don’t raise expectations. Don’t challenge the system. Don’t expose the harsh realities they preferred to ignore.

But Kozol didn’t disappear.

He visited his students’ neighborhoods, spoke with their families, and listened to the grief, and the unyielding hope, behind their stories. He uncovered how schools masked their failures in bureaucratic language, using reports and statistics that softened the brutal truths.

In 1967, Kozol published Death at an Early Age, a heartbreaking account of racial segregation and educational neglect in Boston’s public schools. The book won the National Book Award.

More importantly, it forced America to confront an uncomfortable truth: Separate had never been equal. Inequality thrived in classrooms long after the law had declared victory.

For the next fifty years, Kozol traveled across America, visiting schools most people would never see.

He sat with students in the South Bronx, where water-damaged ceilings sagged. He walked through overcrowded classrooms in Chicago, Philadelphia, Camden, and Washington. He listened to teachers battling against crumbling buildings and a public that simply didn’t care.

Everywhere, he saw the same pattern.

Funding followed wealth, not need.

Children in affluent districts learned in bright, modern classrooms filled with resources and opportunity. Children in poor districts learned in buildings that felt abandoned.

Kozol wrote about these findings in books that became urgent calls to action: Savage Inequalities (1991), Amazing Grace (1995), and The Shame of the Nation (2005).

Each book reinforced the same painful truth: America’s education system rewarded privilege and punished poverty.

Kozol wasn’t a distant observer. He returned to the same students year after year, celebrated their graduations, and listened to their dreams.

Critics called him too emotional, too idealistic, too confrontational.

But Kozol persisted with one question: Why do we accept a system that gives the most to children who already have the most?

Jonathan Kozol never intended to become America’s educational conscience. He just wanted to teach poetry to fourth graders.

What he uncovered pushed him into a lifelong fight for the children America too often overlooks.

And he leaves us with a question that remains unanswered: If equality is a promise, why do our schools still break it every day?

"He was fired for teaching a poem. What he discovered in that classroom became a 60-year fight for the children America keeps forgetting."

Jonathan Kozol was twenty-eight when he stepped into a Boston fourth-grade classroom in 1964, and quickly realized that the system had already abandoned half the children in front of him.

He could have chosen a more comfortable path. He was a Rhodes Scholar. He had studied literature at Harvard and could have built a career far removed from the overcrowded classrooms and peeling paint of urban schools.

Instead, he became a substitute teacher in one of Boston’s most neglected schools.

What he saw there changed everything.

Textbooks falling apart, classes crammed into storage closets, and children divided into low-level groups based on their neighborhoods, income, and skin color—labeled long before they had a chance to show who they really were.

One day, Kozol taught poetry by Black authors to his students. A small act born from his belief that these children deserved more—beauty, complexity, and truth.

The school fired him for it.

He had deviated from the approved curriculum. The message was clear: Don’t raise expectations. Don’t challenge the system. Don’t expose the harsh realities they preferred to ignore.

But Kozol didn’t disappear.

He visited his students’ neighborhoods, spoke with their families, and listened to the grief, and the unyielding hope, behind their stories. He uncovered how schools masked their failures in bureaucratic language, using reports and statistics that softened the brutal truths.

In 1967, Kozol published Death at an Early Age, a heartbreaking account of racial segregation and educational neglect in Boston’s public schools. The book won the National Book Award.

More importantly, it forced America to confront an uncomfortable truth: Separate had never been equal. Inequality thrived in classrooms long after the law had declared victory.

For the next fifty years, Kozol traveled across America, visiting schools most people would never see.

He sat with students in the South Bronx, where water-damaged ceilings sagged. He walked through overcrowded classrooms in Chicago, Philadelphia, Camden, and Washington. He listened to teachers battling against crumbling buildings and a public that simply didn’t care.

Everywhere, he saw the same pattern.

Funding followed wealth, not need.

Children in affluent districts learned in bright, modern classrooms filled with resources and opportunity. Children in poor districts learned in buildings that felt abandoned.

Kozol wrote about these findings in books that became urgent calls to action: Savage Inequalities (1991), Amazing Grace (1995), and The Shame of the Nation (2005).

Each book reinforced the same painful truth: America’s education system rewarded privilege and punished poverty.

Kozol wasn’t a distant observer. He returned to the same students year after year, celebrated their graduations, and listened to their dreams.

Critics called him too emotional, too idealistic, too confrontational.

But Kozol persisted with one question: Why do we accept a system that gives the most to children who already have the most?

Jonathan Kozol never intended to become America’s educational conscience. He just wanted to teach poetry to fourth graders.

What he uncovered pushed him into a lifelong fight for the children America too often overlooks.

And he leaves us with a question that remains unanswered: If equality is a promise, why do our schools still break it every day?

Here’s a polished, engaging Facebook version with strong flow and expanded reach:⸻I regularly recommend humming and othe...
03/20/2026

Here’s a polished, engaging Facebook version with strong flow and expanded reach:



I regularly recommend humming and other vagus nerve exercises to my telehealth patients—not as trends, but as simple, powerful tools for real healing.

These practices gently support nervous system regulation, reduce inflammation, balance hormones, and even improve gut health.

Humming, in particular, is remarkably effective. It can quickly increase nitric oxide, stimulate the vagus nerve, lower cortisol, release stored tension, and shift the body into a “rest-and-digest” state. That makes it a valuable tool for anxiety, insomnia, trauma recovery, and chronic stress.

I often pair humming with other accessible practices like deep breathing, gargling, and singing—sometimes alongside vagal nerve stimulation devices—to improve heart rate variability, calm inflammation, support gut repair, and ease autoimmune symptoms.

The beauty of this work is its simplicity. These small, daily practices help create a sense of internal safety—allowing the body to move out of survival mode and into true restoration and vibrant health.

Your healing doesn’t always need to be complicated. Sometimes it starts with a breath… or even a hum.

I regularly recommend humming and other vagus nerve exercises to my telehealth patients as gentle yet powerful tools for nervous system regulation, calming inflammation, hormone balance and supporting gut health.  
  
Humming instantly spikes nitric oxide, tones the vagus nerve, lowers cortisol, releases stored tension, and activates rest-and-digest mode — making it incredibly effective for anxiety, insomnia, trauma healing, and chronic stress. I also recommend complementary practices like deep breathing, gargling, and singing, paired with vagal nerve stimulation devices, to improve heart rate variability, reduce inflammation, balance hormones, support gut healing, and ease autoimmune symptoms. These simple daily tools create the internal safety your body needs to move from survival mode into true repair and vibrant health.  
  
  
                 

03/19/2026

Many pastors right now are not just tired… they are wounded.A better word than burnout may be moral injury—that deep ach...
03/18/2026

Many pastors right now are not just tired… they are wounded.

A better word than burnout may be moral injury—that deep ache when the work you believe God called you to do feels compromised by forces beyond your control. When every choice feels costly. When faithfulness carries consequences you never expected.

We’re hearing it everywhere.

One pastor shared that during the last election season, preaching felt like walking through a minefield. Speak about truth, humility, or loving enemies—and it’s heard as political. Stay silent—and it’s seen as cowardice. “It felt like the Sermon on the Mount had become controversial.”

Another described preaching after racial violence, believing the gospel required truth-telling—only to be told he’d become “too political.” Later he said, “I felt like I had to choose between my conscience and keeping the church together.”

That’s not just stress. That’s injury to the soul.

Moral injury builds slowly—when we feel pressured to betray our calling, or when we depend on systems that no longer reflect our deepest values. And many pastors today carry a quiet grief few can see.

So the question becomes:
How do I lead… and stay whole?

A few anchors in this season:

• Tell the truth. Name what you’re feeling.
• Remember: you are a shepherd, not the Savior. The church belongs to Jesus.
• Refuse to become a political referee—keep pointing to Christ.
• Redefine unity—not as agreement, but staying at the table with Jesus at the center.
• Don’t do this alone. Isolation deepens the wound.
• Tend your inner life—prayer, Sabbath, silence, time with God that no one sees.

Some seasons of ministry feel like building.
Others feel like grieving.

The prophets knew it. Jesus wept. Paul named his anguish.
Lament is not a failure of faith—it is faith telling the truth.

And here is the quiet hope:

Sometimes moral injury comes from loving the church more than the church seems to love the gospel.
And yet… we keep going.

Not because it’s easy.
Not because we’ve solved it.
But because the One who called us is still faithful.

You are not alone in this.



💬 Question:
Have you experienced moral injury in ministry? What has helped you begin to heal?

Many pastors right now are not just tired. They are wounded.

The language that seems to fit better than burnout is Moral Injury — the deep wound that comes when the work you believe God called you to do feels compromised by forces you cannot control. It happens when every choice feels wrong, when the church you love no longer seems shaped by the gospel in the way you once believed, and when faithfulness comes at a cost you never expected when you were ordained.

We have heard pastors describe this in very concrete ways.

One shared that during the last election season he felt like she was no longer preaching the gospel but walking through a minefield. If she spoke about truth, humility, or loving enemies, some assumed she was attacking their political side. If she said nothing, others accused her of cowardice. She said, “I felt like the Sermon on the Mount had become controversial.” What wounded her was the ongoing sense that loyalty to politics had become stronger than loyalty to Christ.

Another pastor described preaching after a national crisis involving racial violence. He believed the gospel required him to speak about justice and repentance, but some members told him he had become political. Later he said, “I felt like I had to choose between telling the truth as I understand it and keeping the church together.” When a pastor feels forced to continually choose between conscience and survival, something inside breaks.

While these are illustrative, moral injury occurs over time when we are repeatedly being asked to betray our calling or violate our own ethical standards. And it happens when we find ourselves participating in and even dependent upon systems that violate our deepest values.

Many of us entered ministry believing we were called to lead a people shaped by the gospel. But in this season, it can often feels as if the gospel has lost out to a competing ideology, to fear, or to the constant noise from the world around us. When that happens, pastors carry a quiet, deep grief that few people see.

So the question becomes not only “How do I lead this congregation?” but also, “How do I stay whole while I try to lead it?”

One thing that helps is telling the truth about what moral injury feels like. We need to name it!

Some seasons of ministry are busy or discouraging. That’s natural. But this season of ministry can feel like grief or mourning. The prophets knew that feeling. Jesus wept over Jerusalem. Paul wrote about his anguish for the churches. Lament is not a failure of faith. It is a feature of faith. It is faith refusing to pretend.

It also helps to remember that we are shepherds, not saviors. The church was never ours to hold together in the first place. It belongs to Jesus. We are called to be faithful, not to be in control. When we forget that, every conflict feels like failure. When we remember it, the burden is still heavy, but it no longer crushes the soul.

We also have to resist the pressure to become political referees. In divided congregations, people want the pastor to confirm that their side is right. If we live there all the time, our spirit gets pulled apart. Our calling is not to defend a party but to keep pointing to Jesus — to speak about character more than candidates, discipleship more than ideology, and the demands of the gospel on all of us.

Another hard lesson is learning that unity does not mean agreement. The early church itself was full of conflict, yet it stayed together because Jesus was at the center. If unity means everyone thinking the same, we will live in constant disappointment. If unity means staying at the table with Jesus at the center, even when it is hard, the work remains holy.

We also need places where we do not have to be the pastor. Moral injury grows in isolation. We need trusted friends, perhaps a spiritual director, counselor or coach who know us as people, not just as leaders. Jesus stepped away from the crowds. We must do likewise.

And we have to accept something difficult: not everyone in the congregation wants the same church we believe we are called to lead. Some want comfort, some want certainty, some want change, some want the past. We cannot satisfy all of them. When we try, the cost is often our own soul.

So, the bottom line is this: we must tend our inner life as carefully as we tend the life of the congregation — prayer that is not sermon preparation, Sabbath that is kept and kept holy, time with God that no one sees. We cannot carry a divided church with an exhausted spirit.

Sometimes moral injury comes from loving the church more than the church seems to love the gospel. That hurts. But it may also mean we are serving in one of those seasons when faithfulness costs more than we expected.

So we keep going.
Not because it is easy.
Not because we have found some quick fix.
But because the One who called us is still faithful, and the church we are trying to hold together ultimately rests in hands stronger than ours.

—————

Question: In what ways have you experienced this thing called “moral injury”? And if you are experiencing it, what is helping you to find healing from this hidden injury and the ongoing grief?

From Rick Kirchoff for the CcNet FORUM Team

Growth isn’t always soft.Sometimes love looks like accountability.Sometimes support sounds like correction.Sometimes ele...
03/07/2026

Growth isn’t always soft.

Sometimes love looks like accountability.
Sometimes support sounds like correction.
Sometimes elevation feels uncomfortable.

Not everyone who challenges you is against you. In fact, the people who care enough to speak truth into our lives are often the ones helping us grow the most.

A mature spirit understands that refinement is a form of respect. It means someone believes you are capable of becoming more than you are today.

Growth may not always feel gentle—but it is always sacred work.

Much love,
Ashley

Growth isn’t always soft.

Sometimes love looks like accountability.
Sometimes support sounds like correction.
Sometimes elevation feels uncomfortable.

Not everyone who challenges you is against you.

A mature person knows, refinement is respect.

Much love,

Ashley

Studying yourself is one of the most life-changing decisions you can make. 🧠When you learn why you react the way you do ...
02/11/2026

Studying yourself is one of the most life-changing decisions you can make. 🧠

When you learn why you react the way you do — what you’re protecting, what you’re repeating — you stop living on autopilot.

Self-awareness becomes freedom. Knowledge of the self is the ultimate power.

What’s one pattern you’ve uncovered about yourself lately? 💭


Being “nice” isn’t a virtue if it only comes from fear or weakness.Carl Jung called this the Shadow — the part of us tha...
02/11/2026

Being “nice” isn’t a virtue if it only comes from fear or weakness.

Carl Jung called this the Shadow — the part of us that carries anger, jealousy, ambition, and even aggression. Many of us try to bury these parts, believing that repression equals goodness. But what we suppress doesn’t disappear — it often grows stronger.

True maturity isn’t about killing the wolf within you. It’s about learning to leash it.
Real strength is knowing you could be dangerous, yet choosing restraint, compassion, and integrity anyway.

Don’t strive to be harmless. Strive to be formidable — and self-controlled.

Being "nice" is not a virtue if you are only nice because you are too weak to be dangerous.

Carl Jung called it "The Shadow." It’s the part of you that feels anger, jealousy, and greed.
Most people try to hide these feelings. They think pretending they don't exist makes them "good."
Wrong. Repressing them makes you a ticking time bomb.

True maturity isn't killing the wolf inside you. It's putting the wolf on a leash.
When you accept that you could be dangerous, but you choose to be kind, that is when your kindness has value.
Don't be harmless. Be formidable, but controlled.

May you be safe and protected from inner and outer harm. May you be happy and contented. May you be healthy and whole to...
12/08/2025

May you be safe and protected from inner and outer harm.
May you be happy and contented.
May you be healthy and whole to whatever extent possible.
May you have ease of wellbeing.

This season, may we slow down, look closer, and love deeper. A nice word, a small kindness, a moment of grace… it all matters. Let’s be the light that helps someone else find their way back to hope. 💛

Truth
12/05/2025

Truth

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Zelienople, PA
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