Stacy Ismael Therapy

06/01/2024

This is beautiful and so true

Grief is not a task to finish.

29/12/2023

It’s something that walks beside you every day.

28/12/2023

…and eventually, your grief will walk beside you instead of consuming you.

27/12/2023

Cry when you need to.

15/12/2023

So very true ….

WellBeing Etcetera 💙

14/12/2023

To carry regret, we need to recognise that with the tools at our disposal then, we did our best. Looking back, it's like our toolbox was limited. We wish we could've done better, but we need to understand we worked with what we had. Be gentle on yourself.

07/12/2023

Someone in the group sent this to me to share.
I like to think that Instead of “or” maybe it could be “and.”

28/11/2023

I held a party the other week and grief came.

She wasn’t invited but she came anyway - barged her way in through the door and settled down like she was here to stay.

And then she introduced me to the friends she’d brought with her - Anger. Fear. Frustration. Guilt. Hopelessness.

And they sang in the loudest voices, took up space in every corner of the room and spoke over anyone else that tried to talk.

They made it messy and loud and uncomfortable.

But finally, they left.

And long afterwards, when I was all alone,
I realised there was still someone here.
Quietly clearing up after the rest.

I asked who she was and she told me, “Love.”

And I assumed that’s why she looked familiar - because I had met her before.
“Or perhaps,” she said, “it’s because I’ve been here the whole time.”

And I was confused then because I hadn’t seen her all evening.

But when I looked more closely,
when I looked into her eyes,
I realised quietly that she had been here.
All the time.

She’d just been dressed as grief.

*****

Becky Hemsley 2023
Image created with Canva

Sometimes it helps to remember that underneath our grief, there is love. It was there before, it’s there now and it will still be there afterwards.
I share this poem a lot because I think it encapsulates that idea of grief simply being love in disguise ❤

‘Afterparty’ is from the book When I Am Gone
https://a.co/d/35WJcRh

20/11/2023

If we could speak to our grief ….

I’m leaving you here. For one night I want to forget. And maybe smile.

Grief: You can’t leave me behind.

I’m tired. You are heavy. Sometimes you are just too much to bear.

Grief: I am a part of you now.

I can shut the door. Forget you for a few hours.

Grief. That is not how this works. I will always catch up to you.

Why are you doing this to me? It’s not fair. You are much too dark to take everywhere I go.

Grief: Maybe we need another way to think about this.

How would there be any other way?

Grief: Well..for starters, I am only here because of love.

No. You are here because my loved one died.

Grief: But you still feel love.

Always.

Grief: You just renamed me. That is why I am here. I am Love always. You can’t just leave me. I’m a part of you.

But it hurts so much. No more phone calls. Hugs. Plans. Empty chairs. Holidays… I can’t take this pain.

Grief: Running from me only makes it harder for you. Sit with me. I am only the love you still have to give. So feel it. Give some of it to yourself. Carry me with you. Picture me as only love and light.

So why have I been so afraid of you?

Grief: Because reality is hard to accept. This is the hardest thing to do. It takes time to get used to me. But I am here to help you remember.

I just want to be over this.

Grief: The pain you feel when a memory crosses your mind will someday make you smile. It’s because the longer you carry me with you…the wonderful memories will stay with you too.

So instead of carrying grief…I can think of it as carrying my love?

Grief: Light a candle within me. Love isn’t dark. I’m only light. I remain because all your love for your person still remains in you. I am love you wish to still give. I cannot be left behind. I carry on with you until the day you reunite.

So hold that light in your hand. And carry that love with you. To the very last of days.

11/10/2023

Meet Luna … my miniature poodle who is trained as a therapy dog and loves to join me in sessions. Therapy dogs like Luna play a crucial role in promoting mental well-being and offer valuable support to clients facing emotional challenges. Having Luna present in sessions can help clients feel grounded and comforted, empowering them to express difficult feelings and experiences.

Clients have experienced positive outcomes with Luna's presence, including a reduction in stress and anxiety levels, and an improvement in their mood. If you are looking for a counsellor and think that having Luna in your therapy session could benefit you, please feel free to let me know, and we can arrange for her to be a part of our sessions.

07/10/2023

Sometimes it’s the simple things …..

06/10/2023

Today I’m sharing a blog I recently wrote about anger and grief. If you are recently bereaved, I hope you find some comfort in the words. If I can help in any way, please do not hesitate to reach out.

Discover all things counselling, bereavement therapy and pet-assisted therapy on my insightful blog.