Katherine van Heerden Psychology Practice

26/09/2025

25/09/2025

think i will have to look for this book 🤔

24/09/2025

24/09/2025

Attachment is not extra. It’s not a bonus or a parenting style — it’s survival. For a child, feeling securely connected to their caregiver is as essential as the food they eat and the air they breathe.

Because when children feel attached, the world makes sense. They know they are safe, they know they are wanted, and that becomes the soil where everything else can grow.

From that place, confidence takes root. Curiosity blooms. Their hearts learn that love isn’t scarce, so they don’t have to cling or control. They are free to give, because they know they are held.

Love given freely doesn’t make them fragile — it makes them strong. It teaches them that closeness is safe, that tenderness is not weakness, that giving to others will not leave them empty. The more love they receive, the more love they have to give.

But when attachment is uncertain or withheld, the ground beneath them shifts. A child may grow watchful, questioning their worth. They may cling too tightly out of fear, or harden themselves against disappointment. They may learn to survive, but never fully trust.

And in that survival, something is stolen — the ease of belonging, the courage to risk, the freedom to rest in themselves. Too much of their energy goes into guarding what should have been a given: the right to feel safe, wanted, and worthy.

That’s why attachment matters. It’s not about perfect parenting — it’s about presence, attunement, and the quiet promise: you are safe with me…

When a child carries that truth inside, it changes not just their childhood, but the way they will move through the rest of their life. ❤️

Quote Credit: Robert Shaw, M.D.❣️

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22/09/2025

We are scared of the wrong things...

We worry about skinned knees and climbing too high, while overlooking the real danger quietly unfolding.

Children are moving less than ever before, even though movement is what builds both the body and the brain. Only about one in four children meet daily activity recommendations, and outdoor free play has dropped by more than half in recent decades.

And when children are outside, they are rarely given the freedom their bodies and brains need. They are hovered over, directed, redirected, and told “be careful” every other minute. Instead of climbing, leaping, and testing their limits, they are being micromanaged.

Meanwhile, screen use is at an all-time high.

Preschoolers now average over two hours a day, and older children often five or more. Constant screen time drains the developing nervous system, disrupts sleep and dopamine regulation, and leaves children still, sedentary, and emotionally flooded (and disconnected from others).

In trying to prevent every hurt, we’ve stripped away the very experiences that wire children to handle the world. Running, climbing, crashing, wrestling, and recovering build balance, coordination, emotional regulation, and resilience. Without this, children are left fragile in every way, with adulthood being far more challenging than you'd imagine.

We are bubble-wrapping childhood and calling it safety, while it is quietly costing them their strength, confidence, and trust in themselves (short and long term consequences).

This is the conversation we need to have.

Join us next Wednesday (9/24) for our live webinar Brave Play: Risk, Weapons, Destructive Play, and the Freedom to Explore (part 3 in the summer of play series).

A full recording will be sent to all registrants so you can watch anytime.

Free Registration: https://us06web.zoom.us/webinar/register/WN_gauhhsCsR7usaSLppZn5vw

Catch up on Parts 1 & 2 and get certified for any or all three: https://www.weskoolhouse.com/store-webinars

14/09/2025

Institute of Child Psychology 🩵