Ronélle Hart Psychologist

30/09/2025

I've been grappling with this notion for a while: the prevailing trauma narrative as an explanation and often an excuse for abusive or dysfunctional behaviour. So here's a reminder: we are born with certain personality traits, which form the very foundation of our experiences in the world. Experiencing trauma is not an adequate excuse for pathology(ie harmful behaviour to others and self) https://www.facebook.com/share/v/19nemNCR63/?mibextid=wwXIfr

19/08/2025

I'm returning to The School Of Life's rich source of how to think about life's issues. Sharing here a post I came across this morning. Worth following them. https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1LasRPssVR/?mibextid=wwXIfr

05/06/2025

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2025/jun/02/therapy-isnt-about-life-hacks-the-best-solutions-are-simpler-and-more-complex?CMP=share_btn_url&fbclid=IwQ0xDSwKuR91leHRuA2FlbQIxMQABHqvqe-9G2bzk58GOJnvGyaVdkICv7OgL_Q0QyJ98q2W892B4ZEDUUvSFq7da_aem_4kcmYPY7YbDmkalomdrOAg

What we want is quick, clever fixes. What we need is quite different: the ability to tolerate intolerable feelings, to sustainably change and grow

05/12/2024

I'd say that this is a good therapeutic outcome.

04/11/2024

Ah, a psychologist hero of mine: Irvin Yalom. Wise words.

“Indeed, the capacity to tolerate uncertainty is a prerequisite for the profession. Though the public may believe that therapists guide patients systematically and sure-handedly through predictable stages of therapy to a foreknown goal, such is rarely the case: instead, as these stories bear witness, therapists frequently wobble, improvise, and grope for direction. The powerful temptation to achieve certainty through embracing an ideological school and a tight therapeutic system is treacherous: such belief may block the uncertain and spontaneous encounter necessary for effective therapy. This encounter, the very heart of psychotherapy, is a caring, deeply human meeting between two people, one (generally, but not always, the patient) more troubled than the other. Therapists have a dual role: they must both observe and participate in the lives of their patients. As observer, one must be sufficiently objective to provide necessary rudimentary guidance to the patient. As participant, one enters into the life of the patient and is affected and sometimes changed by the encounter.”
--- Irvin D. Yalom, M.D.

26/08/2024

The basic task of helping professionals in general, and psychotherapists in particular, is to become full human beings, and to inspire full human beingness in others who feel starved about their lives. (Chogyam Trungpa)

21/08/2024

Love this.

31/03/2024

Wisdom from Jon Frederikson, a foremost ISTDP(Intensive Short Term Dynamic Psychotherapy)teacher:

"Where are we going in therapy?

Therapists and patients both ask, “Where are we going?” In one sense, we could answer that with one word: nowhere. Why? Because defenses are always designed to take us away from reality and our feelings about it. But no matter where we go, reality shows up. Thus, defenses help us take imaginary “journeys” away from what is, this moment. But we really can’t go anywhere, since we are always here, now.

And yet, as we let go of defenses, there is a sense of movement. Even the word emotion comes from the Latin e-movere, to convey the sense of something inside moving outward. We often think of therapy as moving toward an agreed upon conscious goal. And that is true on the conscious level. But a therapy that touches our depths does more. It reaches toward something unknown and unlocatable in space, the inner you. Where are we going? Toward the unknown of the patient and the unknown of the therapist. And because we do not know the unknown, we can’t know in advance where we are going. And even when we touch on the unknown in ourselves or the patient, it remains unnamable, unsayable, never to be captured by a concept or sentence. Just as music cannot be reduced to words, neither can the inner life of you and your patients."

12/03/2024

From The School of Life

08/02/2024

James Hollis:

"As I have put it elsewhere, we need to periodically ask, "What wants to come into the world through me?" This is not an ego-driven, narcissistic question. It is a query which summons us to show up, to serve something larger than the familiar, the comfortable. Surely one of the most telling tests of our lives is whether we are living in a way which is driven more by challenge than by comfort, one which asks more of us than we had planned to offer."

01/01/2024

A gentle, wise offering. Wishing us all a year of discoveries and psychological growth and wellbeing.

"There is a beauty in the fragility of life, a sweetness to be savored in its fleeting moments of joy. For it is in the rawness of our experiences, both the joyful and the sorrowful, that we truly come alive. We are not meant to shield ourselves from the pain of life, but to embrace it fully, to let it shape us, to teach us, to make us more human.
So do not be afraid to love, to open your heart to the world, even if it means risking heartbreak. For the sweetness of love far outweighs the bitterness of loss. And when the inevitable pain comes, find solace in the beauty of the world around you, in the simple pleasures of life, in the memories of love and laughter. For even in the midst of sorrow, there is still beauty to be found."

15/12/2023

“You cannot rush the healing process. It takes approximately 20 years for the human brain to fully form and many years of careful guidance to help a child develop the social and emotional intelligence to navigate the complexities of adulthood. Our earliest years should prepare us for the inevitable challenges of life, such as working through conflicts with loved ones or coping with loss. However, when you have grown up with childhood trauma, you have to fill in the gaps left behind by neglect or abuse, and this takes time. I encourage you to recognize that reclaiming your life from childhood trauma requires a long-term commitment to yourself and to the healing process.”
From A Practical Guide to Complex PTSD
By Arielle Schwartz