31/07/2025
31 "Stupid" Things You Must Do to Have an Exceptional Marriage
(Numbers 7, 14,25 is very stupid)
By bisi Adewale
When people hear the word "stupid," they often associate it with carelessness or ignorance. But in this context, “stupid” means radical, countercultural, and against human nature, actions that seem unreasonable to selfish people but are deeply wise to those who want to build extraordinary marriages.
A great marriage is not built by feelings, luck, or fate, it’s built by intention, humility, and sometimes what looks like foolish love. Here are 31 "stupid" things you must do to build a marriage that lasts and thrives.
1. Say “I’m sorry” even when you think you’re right.
Choosing peace over pride is the foundation of intimacy. Apologizing doesn’t mean you’re weak, it means you value the relationship more than your ego.
2. Forgive quickly and fully.
Bitterness poisons the soul of a marriage. Forgiveness doesn’t excuse wrong behavior — it sets you free from the emotional prison of resentment.
3. Celebrate your spouse in public and correct in private.
Honor multiplies affection. Shaming them in front of others may win the moment but wounds the marriage.
4. Keep dating your spouse even after decades.
Romance is like fire, it dies without fuel. Keep the spark alive by planning date nights, surprising each other, and flirting.
5. Talk sweetly even when you feel sour.
Kind words calm the storm. Tone and tenderness can save what shouting destroys.
6. Give without expecting anything in return.
True love gives to bless, not to bargain. The happiest marriages are those where both partners outgive each other.
7. Laugh at their dry jokes.
Joy is the secret ingredient of thriving relationships. Find reasons to smile, even in simple, silly moments.
8. Say “I love you” every single day.
Don’t assume they know. Let your words build a fortress of security around their heart.
9. Touch them affectionately daily.
A hug, a kiss, a shoulder squeeze, physical touch speaks what words often can’t.
10. Pray for them more than you talk about them.
Your words reach God faster than they reach your spouse. Prayer changes hearts and atmospheres.
11. Protect your marriage from third-party interference.
Don’t let in-laws, friends, exes, or social media come between you. Set firm boundaries.
12. Choose your spouse every morning, even on hard days.
Marriage is a daily decision. Love is a choice, not just a feeling.
13. Be their biggest encourager, not their biggest critic.
Your voice should be the loudest in their ears, cheering them on through wins and failures.
14. Serve them with joy, not duty.
When both partners serve, no one feels burdened. Joyful service is romantic.
15. Let small things go.
Not every battle is worth fighting. Learn to rise above irritation and pick peace over petty.
16. Surprise them with little acts of love.
A note. A meal. A text. Small gestures create unforgettable joy.
17. Listen more than you speak.
Listening is loving. Hear their heart, not just their words.
18. Invest time in their interests, not just yours.
Watch their favorite show. Join them in their hobby. Connection grows in shared experience.
19. Admit your weaknesses.
Vulnerability is strength in marriage. Openness invites intimacy.
20. Say “thank you” for the everyday things.
Gratitude multiplies affection. Never let them feel taken for granted.
21. Flirt with your spouse, not with strangers.
Flirt like you’re still trying to win their heart. It keeps love fresh and fun.
22. Be faithful in your thoughts, not just your actions.
Emotional cheating is real. Guard your mind fiercely.
23. Build dreams together.
A shared vision unites your hearts. Dream, plan, and work toward something bigger than both of you.
24. Stop keeping score.
Love doesn’t keep records of wrongs. Scorekeeping destroys unity.
25. Applaud effort, not just success.
Celebrate their trying. Encouragement fuels growth.
26. Be available, not just present.
Presence without attention is absence in disguise. Put the phone down, look them in the eye.
27. Have honest, hard conversations.
Surface talk won’t heal deep wounds. Speak the truth in love, not in accusation.
28. Give grace for their bad days.
They’re human, not perfect. Be gentle when they’re fragile.
29. Be their peace, not their pressure.
The world is already hard. Let home be a place of rest and support.
30. Grow spiritually together.
Pray, study, worship, and build spiritual intimacy. It’s the foundation of lasting love.
31. Laugh, love, live — fully and daily.
Life is short. Don’t wait for perfect conditions to enjoy each other. Make your marriage a haven, not a battlefield.
FINAL THOUGHT:
To outsiders, these may seem foolish — too sacrificial, too loving, too humble. But for those who desire an exceptional marriage, these are the foundations. Do the “stupid” things with consistency, and you’ll find yourself enjoying something most people only dream of.
Would you like this turned into a book, teaching series, or social media campaign? Let me know!
©️Pastor Bisi Adewale
