Dr. Ilse Ruane Psychology

21/10/2025

Sometimes no matter how you try to look at your emotions from a different perspective, they are what they are. In those times, the goal is not changing your emotional experience but rather about managing your emotions. When you manage your emotions well, you are not learning to feel differently. It’s about learning to think differently about how you feel. Feelings are relational.

17/10/2025

We all need to be cognizant of the circle around us. We become like those we surround ourselves with. The more we are exposed to behaviour, we normalize that behaviour. The more we speak about things in a certain way, speaking about it in that way becomes normal. And the more we accept what’s not for us, the quicker we settle for what we would never settle for ordinarily. Things that we would probably never tolerate somehow become “ok” and we arrive at a point in the future where we have comprised our values, morals and ultimately ourselves too.

Side note: I would replace the word “toxic” with problematic.

13/10/2025

The signs you ignore in the beginning, will be the reasons you leave in the end. Choose wisely.

23/09/2025

12/09/2025

Red flags in a relationship are warning signs that signal unhealthy or manipulative behaviour.
When someone shows you a red flag, even once, don’t make it a habit of giving them the benefit of the doubt. What they are showing you, is who they are.

10/09/2025

I have been asked repeatedly about what it means to have standards and what to do when someone doesn’t share them. Having standards is a benchmark for personal and professional behaviour. It guides the quality of relationships and decisions are based on a set of values and expectations.

Having standards sets the tone for how you interact with people and what you tolerate from people. By surrounding yourself with people who have standards for their behaviour and words which align with your standards reduces conflict in relationships. Frankly aligned standards, morals and values will reduce turmoil and friction within all relationships.

When in doubt about what the course of action you should take is - the best way to gauge if you should do something is to ask yourself “would I like it if someone did that to me?”

02/09/2025

Just go…

15/08/2025

Show up for yourself every chance you get 🤗

05/08/2025

☝🏻Taking back your power doesn’t need to be a dramatic experience. It can be a gentle process of moving towards the realization that you are in charge of your future and may require positioning people accordingly within their realm of influence.

03/08/2025

For the athletes that I work with. And everyone else who wants greatness in whatever form.
“His success is a reminder- to athletes, coaches, and parents— that detaching your identity from results isn’t just good for your mental health... it might be your greatest competitive advantage.” Here’s the link:
https://www.instagram.com/p/DMaIIEgNiWJ/?img_index=5&igsh=eDhyNHY0MHYxYWZ1

28/07/2025

A little tough-in-cheek today but “trust the process” is a reminder to stay committed to your journey, by remaining patient, persistent and believing in the potential for change, even when the journey is difficult.