Adolescent Mind Lab

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Empowering adolescents (ages 14–27) with brain-smart tools and science-backed strategies to build confidence, resilience, self-belief, and meaningful connections — so they can thrive in adolescence and beyond.

Shout out to my newest followers! Excited to have you onboard!Andrea Lourens, Suann van der Merwe, Caroline Ashley Peter...
12/12/2025

Shout out to my newest followers! Excited to have you onboard!

Andrea Lourens, Suann van der Merwe, Caroline Ashley Petersen, Lara Maré, Carina Olivier Botes

🎄 HOLIDAY HAPPINESS TOOL 3: PLAN FOR WELL-BEING — PART 3 & BONUS STEPS 🎄When we think about PLANNING FOR THE HOLIDAYS, m...
11/12/2025

🎄 HOLIDAY HAPPINESS TOOL 3: PLAN FOR WELL-BEING — PART 3 & BONUS STEPS 🎄

When we think about PLANNING FOR THE HOLIDAYS, many of us slip into the belief that it’s a ONE-PERSON JOB. One person carries the list… remembers the details… holds the emotions… organises the plans… and tries to make it magical for everyone else.

But the truth is — holiday planning is a FAMILY JOB, not an individual one.
When we bring the whole family into the conversation, something shifts.
The pressure softens.
The emotional load spreads.
And the choices become more meaningful. 💛

That’s why this week’s steps (7–9) focus on SHARED DECISION-MAKING — choosing together what matters, what no longer fits, and what you actually have the capacity to enjoy.

To recap where we’ve been so far:

✨ WEEK 1 — CLARITY (STEPS 1–3)
We reduced overwhelm by getting everything out of your mind and reconnecting with the PURPOSE behind each activity. CLARITY always comes before PEACE.

✨ WEEK 2 — CAPACITY (STEPS 4–6)
These steps helped you look at TIME, EMOTIONAL ENERGY, and REALISTIC LIMITS. Every activity — even the fun ones — draws from the same internal battery.

✨ THIS WEEK — SHARED DECISION-MAKING (STEPS 7–9)
Holidays aren’t meant to be designed by one person while everyone else simply participates. Bringing your family into the decision-making process reduces EMOTIONAL LABOUR and strengthens CONNECTION.

✨ BONUS STEPS — REGULATION, GROUNDING & INTENTION (STEPS 10–12)
BUFFER TIME, grounding moments, and intentional pauses help your nervous system stay settled so you can actually ENJOY the plans you’ve chosen. 🌿

So in summary:

• CLARITY — STEPS 1–3
• CAPACITY — STEPS 4–6
• SHARED DECISION-MAKING — STEPS 7–9
• REGULATION, GROUNDING & INTENTION — STEPS 10–12

I’ll be sharing ALL FOUR SLIDES with the full series THIS SATURDAY so you can work through the steps at your own pace. 📖✨

And next week, we shift into a new supportive tool.

💆‍♀️ TUESDAY’S TOOL: EASE TO RELIEVE
This tool helps RELEASE MUSCULAR AND MENTAL TENSION so you feel better physically, emotionally, and mentally — giving you more capacity to handle family friction in CALMER, WISER, and MORE HELPFUL ways. 🌿

11/12/2025

To all my new followers — WELCOME and thank you so much for being here. 🤍✨

I truly appreciate every one of you. I’m looking forward to sharing my insights, my tools, and the lessons I’ve gathered along this path of life. Because sharing is caring — and what better way to care than to share the things that have helped me, helped my son, and helped the young people and families I work with.

We learn so much from each other, and I’m grateful you’ve chosen to join me here.

Thank you for being here. 🌿✨

WHY WE FEAR FAILURE(Bouncing Back From Disappointment Series)This time of year can feel heavy for so many families. Repo...
10/12/2025

WHY WE FEAR FAILURE
(Bouncing Back From Disappointment Series)

This time of year can feel heavy for so many families. Report cards, exam results, and personal setbacks often arrive all at once… and the emotional load is real.

I wanted to share something important today, because whether you're a parent, a teen, or a teacher, this question keeps coming up:

WHY DOES “FAILURE” HIT US SO HARD? 🤍
Why does it feel so personal, so heavy, and so threatening?

When something goes wrong — whether it’s our own setback or our teen not getting the marks they hoped for — it goes deeper than the moment. It stirs up fears, worries, and the unhelpful stories we tell ourselves about the future.

Here’s the relief:

It isn’t because we’re negative or overreacting.
It’s because our brains are WIRED FOR PROTECTION.

Inside each of us is a built-in alarm system, the LIMBIC SYSTEM, created to keep us safe.
So the moment we see something that looks like “failure,” that alarm fires straight away:

“Something’s wrong. Their future might be at risk.”

Then the PREFRONTAL CORTEX steps in… the clever but sometimes tricky part of the brain that imagines the future.
But when we’re stressed, it doesn’t imagine growth or possibility.
It jumps to WORST-CASE SCENARIOS:

👉 “If this term didn’t go well, what about next year?”
👉 “What about university?”
👉 “What does this mean for their whole life?”

Parents often feel this even more intensely than teens, because our brains are wired to protect their futures with everything we have. 💛
Teachers feel it too — they carry so much emotional weight for so many young people.

So that fear you feel?
It’s not failure.
It’s BIOLOGY trying to protect you and the people you love.

And once we understand this, something softens.

The shame loosens.
The panic quiets.
And we can finally see the moment for what it really is:

A MOMENT, NOT A VERDICT.

Failure isn’t final.
It’s FEEDBACK.
It’s a TURNING POINT.
It’s often the beginning of RESILIENCE, not the end of possibility. 🌱

And how we respond in these moments teaches our teens — and ourselves — what to do when life doesn’t go as planned.

NEXT WEDNESDAY
I’ll be sharing something personal - my own experience with disappointment and failure, and the mindset shift that helped me BOUNCE BACK stronger than I ever expected.

If this helped you today, please share it with someone who needs the reminder that setbacks don’t define us… they guide us. 💫
And if you’re feeling overwhelmed right now, you’re not alone. You’re doing your best.


🎄 HOLIDAY HAPPINESS TOOL 3: PLAN FOR WELL-BEING — PART 2 🎄So many of us grew up believing that MORE equals HAPPIER.More ...
09/12/2025

🎄 HOLIDAY HAPPINESS TOOL 3: PLAN FOR WELL-BEING — PART 2 🎄

So many of us grew up believing that MORE equals HAPPIER.
More outings.
More activities.
More traditions.
More “making it special.” ✨

But from a neuroscience perspective, the opposite is often true.

Your brain doesn’t measure happiness by how MUCH you do — it measures it by how much CAPACITY you have to actually EXPERIENCE what you’re doing.

And here’s the part we forget 👇

Every single activity — EVEN THE FUN ONES — costs ENERGY. ⚡
Just like your phone battery drains every time you open an app, your brain and nervous system lose energy every time you plan, prepare, host, drive, or socialise.

When there’s no space to recharge, you start operating like a phone on 14%… trying to keep going while the system is quietly shutting down in the background. 📉📱

And this is when you begin to feel:
• overstretched
• emotionally thin
• easily triggered
• heavy, tired, or flat
• disconnected from the joy you expected to feel

It’s not because you’re doing anything wrong.
It’s because ENERGY DEPLETION comes before EMOTIONAL DEPLETION.
Your brain simply can’t enjoy the moment when it’s running on low power. 💛

That’s why STEPS 4–6 of this tool matter so much.

They help you pause and ask the questions we almost never ask ourselves:
👉 Do I actually have the ENERGY for this?
👉 Is this realistic for my CURRENT CAPACITY?
👉 What would feel NOURISHING instead of DRAINING?

Because happiness doesn’t come from doing more — it comes from CHOOSING WHAT TRULY MATTERS. ✨

And when you choose fewer, more meaningful things, your nervous system finally gets the space to recharge… allowing you (and your family) to actually enjoy the holiday you’re creating. 🎄💛

If you missed STEPS 1–3, you can read them here:
https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1A2SSv6cmV/

#

08/12/2025

December has a way of filling up before we even realise it — and our brains feel the pressure long before the holidays begin.

That’s why I’m sharing my Holiday Happiness tool, Planning for Happiness, one gentle step at a time.

Last week Thursday, I shared Steps 1–3.
If you want to catch up on those, they’re on my page — just follow Adolescent Mind Lab,, and you’ll find them there.

Tomorrow (Tuesday) I’ll be sharing Steps 4–6, .... And on Thursday, I’ll share Steps 7–9. With this full nine-step framework, you and your family will enjoy a calmer, happier, and steadier December.

The next steps drop tomorrow night at 8.






🌿 HOLIDAY HAPPINESS TOOL 3 - PLAN FOR WELL-BEINGDecember often feels full before we even begin.Between family expectatio...
04/12/2025

🌿 HOLIDAY HAPPINESS TOOL 3 - PLAN FOR WELL-BEING

December often feels full before we even begin.
Between family expectations, social pressure, old traditions, and the desire to “make it magical,” your brain can shift into survival mode without you realising it.

Here’s what actually happens in the brain.

When there are too many demands and not enough space, the THREAT SYSTEM activates.
This is the part of the brain designed to protect you.
Once it switches on, your body starts releasing stress signals that make you feel:

• overstimulated
• tired but not rested
• emotionally reactive
• anxious or irritable
• pulled into old family dynamics you thought you’d outgrown

This happens to adults and teens.
It’s not weakness. It’s neuroscience.

That’s why this week’s tool is so important.

TOOL 3 helps you PAUSE the noise and return to what truly matters.
It slows the brain down.
It reduces cognitive overload.
It helps your nervous system settle so you can enjoy the holidays instead of pushing through them.

When you gently map out what’s on your plate (as shown in the image), you often realise:

• many activities aren’t actually yours to carry
• certain traditions no longer match your family’s energy
• most of the emotional labour sits on one person’s shoulders
• removing just one activity can bring instant relief

Your brain — and your heart — thrive on clarity, not chaos.

Sometimes less really does create more magic.

More Holiday Happiness Tools coming next week to support you and your family through December. Follow my page and switch on notifications so you don’t miss them.

HAVE YOU EVER FELT A DISAPPOINTMENT SO SHARP IT STAYED WITH YOU?The kind that doesn’t just hurt in the moment, but settl...
03/12/2025

HAVE YOU EVER FELT A DISAPPOINTMENT SO SHARP IT STAYED WITH YOU?
The kind that doesn’t just hurt in the moment, but settles somewhere deeper? 💛

I know that feeling well.

When I was in matric, I walked into my history exam believing I would get a B, maybe even an A.
That was the picture I held in my mind.
That was the outcome I had prepared myself for.

When the results arrived, I had a D.

I still remember the shock in my body.
The heaviness.
The sinking feeling in my chest.
It wasn’t just a mark.
It felt like something inside me cracked.
My confidence dropped. My belief in myself shifted.
And at the time, I had no language for what I was feeling.

Only years later, after diving deeper into emotional wellbeing and neuroscience, did I finally understand why disappointment hits us so intensely.
And this matters for adults, for parents, and for teens.

💡 DISAPPOINTMENT IS NOT OVERSENSITIVITY.
💡 IT IS NOT WEAKNESS.
💡 IT IS A REAL BRAIN RESPONSE.

When we hope for something, the brain creates an internal picture of how things should go.
It prepares for that version of the future.

🧠 DOPAMINE RISES BEFORE THE REWARD, because the brain is already anticipating success.

So when reality doesn’t match the picture we carried, dopamine drops sharply.
The brain experiences it as a loss.
It shifts into its THREAT SYSTEM, which is why we feel panic, shame, heaviness or that sinking “What happened to me?” feeling.

This is not just a teen experience.
Adults feel it just as deeply because the same systems are involved.

Today, I’m sharing a series of images that break down THE NEUROSCIENCE BEHIND DISAPPOINTMENT in a simple, gentle and supportive way.
Understanding this doesn’t erase the pain, but it softens the shame.
It reminds us that nothing is wrong with us.
We are wired to feel this way, and we can steady ourselves again.

Please take a moment to read through each image.
These facts may give you language, relief, and compassion for yourself or your teen.
And you are so welcome to share them with a friend who might need this today.

If you or your teen are sitting with disappointment right now, I hope this brings clarity and a little more gentleness for your heart. 💛

Sarah
Adolescent Mind Lab

Only years later, after diving deeper into emotional well-being and neuroscience, did I finally understand why disappointment hits us so intensely.

Tonight on my page Adolescent Mind Lab, I’m sharing a gentle, neuroscience-informed breakdown of why disappointment hurt...
03/12/2025

Tonight on my page Adolescent Mind Lab, I’m sharing a gentle, neuroscience-informed breakdown of why disappointment hurts so deeply — for adults and teens.

I’m keeping it simple, practical, and supportive, especially for anyone carrying something heavy this December.

Tonight on my page Adolescent Mind Lab, I’m sharing a gentle, simple breakdown of why disappointment feels so intense — for adults and teens.

This is something so many of us feel but rarely understand.
And when you finally see what’s happening in the brain, your own reactions — and your teen’s reactions — start to make so much more sense.

If you’d like to follow along, I’ll be posting the full series this evening.
You’re welcome to join us there. 💛

Adolescent Mind Lab
(Please follow the page to see the slides)

OLIDAY HAPPINESS – TOOL 1: LEARNING TO EXHALEIf you think you’re enlightened, spend a week with your family. And if you ...
02/12/2025

OLIDAY HAPPINESS – TOOL 1: LEARNING TO EXHALE

If you think you’re enlightened, spend a week with your family. And if you really believe you’re enlightened, try doing it during the holidays.

December has a way of pressing old EMOTIONAL BUTTONS. Even the most grounded adult can suddenly feel like their teenage self again: overwhelmed, irritated, or quietly shutting down. Family ROLES, expectations, old STORIES, and year-end exhaustion can turn moments of joy into tension, guilt, or emotional overload.

But this year CAN feel different.

Over the next three weeks, I’m sharing gentle HOLIDAY HAPPINESS tools to support PARENTS, WOMEN, TEENS, and anyone who feels December in their NERVOUS SYSTEM. These tools help you stay STEADY, CENTRED, and CONNECTED, even when family dynamics or festive pressures feel emotionally heavy.

Today we begin with a simple tool that makes a surprisingly powerful difference.

🌿 TOOL 1: LEARNING TO EXHALE

Most of us don’t realise how quickly we EXHALE. When the out-breath is shallow or rushed, the BRAIN stays in a quiet THREAT STATE. Thinking becomes foggy. Reactions become sharper. We feel more sensitive, more tired, and more easily overwhelmed.

A slow, steady EXHALE tells the body it is SAFE. It activates the PARASYMPATHETIC NERVOUS SYSTEM, lowers CORTISOL, and helps the mind shift into clarity and calm. It lowers your emotional temperature, steadies your reactions, and supports RESPONDING rather than snapping, shutting down, or spiralling.

Try slowing your EXHALE today. Let it be longer than your inhale. Repeat a few times whenever you feel tense, overloaded, or pulled into old family patterns. These gentle breaths create real physiological shifts, especially during the festive season.

The full step-by-step guide is in the image above. A few slow breaths can genuinely change how your whole body feels.

If you’d like the full twelve-tool HOLIDAY HAPPINESS E-BOOK, send me a DM with the word HOLIDAY.

More tools coming on Thursday.
Let’s make this December calmer, kinder, and lighter for you and the people you love. 🌿✨

01/12/2025

✨ DECEMBER SUPPORT SERIES ✨

Hi everyone,

As we step into December, I know this month can feel like a mix of joy, pressure, tiredness, and emotion — especially for parents and teens. 🌿💛

I’m running a gentle December Support Series here on my page Adolescent Mind Lab., to help you, your family, and your teen feel calmer, more supported, and more grounded during the holidays. ✨

Here’s what you can expect:

• Holiday Happiness Tools (Tuesdays & Thursdays) 🎄💫
Simple, practical, brain-and-heart boosters to bring more calm, ease, and connection into your home.
I’ll be sharing 6 tools over the next 3 weeks — small shifts that make the holiday season feel lighter for everyone.

• Bouncing Back From Disappointment (Wednesdays) 📘🌱
A compassionate mini-series for both teens and adults navigating results stress, setbacks, and the emotional distress of feeling like you’ve “failed.”
These posts will help you understand what’s happening in the brain, and how to support yourself or your teen with more steadiness and self-kindness.

My hope is that this series gives you a softer December — one where you feel a little less alone, and a little more prepared for the season ahead. 🤍

Let’s walk it together.
Sarah
Adolescent Mind Lab

You’re welcome to follow my page to stay connected and receive each December post as it comes out. 🌿✨

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Somersetwes

Opening Hours

09:00 - 10:00

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+27630915735

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