19/05/2025
Lost in translation!
A friend went to Beijing recently and was giving this brochure by the hotel. It is precious.
She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels depressed.
Odviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English.
Getting there:
Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the hotel runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You will know you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the bend.
The manager will await you in the entrance hall
He always trys to have in*******se with all new guests.
The Hotel:
This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in the evening to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate at the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note the ladies are not allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with them self.
The Restaurant:
Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.
Your Room:
Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity! ... You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road between the hotel and the lake is only used by pederasts.
Bed:
You bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her. She will be pleased to squash your shirt, blouses and underwear. If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.
Above All:
When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You will struggle to forget it.
