Understanding Bipolar: The Magic & the Mayhem

12/04/2026

I hate being bipolar, it’s awesome. Learning to ride the waves and cope in the lows, not over feed the highs, it is a constant pendulum and negotiation with my brain. Just checking in with an update, how are you guys doing?

10/04/2026

Hey friends, so… many people have told me to write a book over the years, i’ve finally gotten around to it, i am about 100 pages deep at this stage and going strong. The book is a memoir, mixed in with short fictional stories, poetry, freewriting, journal entries, and what i call mayhok ‘bursts’.

It is fragmented - because - such is life, and such is living with bipolar. Expect philosophy, psychology, intimacy and truth. I am laying it all bare and welcoming you into the world within and around me.

I have made a Back-a-buddy page to support the project, please donate if you are in a position to and I’ll slip you an autographed copy when it’s published. Your donations are private and I wont know who gave what so no pressures, I know many of you support me in spirit and that is enough.

The campaign is running for one month. Support if you can. Lots of love Nina

Mayok / The Middle is Missing (still deciding on the title of the book) Introduction from Author - Nina Bekink Living with bipolar has brought ...

01/04/2026

Bipolar 101

01/04/2026

Started writing a book about my experiences living with bipolar. I am publishing chapter by chapter on https://substack.com/ - follow like share give me feedback. This work is aimed to make us feel less alone, understand and navigate bipolar better, and importantly, be a guide to help friends and family to be better equipt to cope and support.

31/03/2026

This is me well. And me in a severe episode. It is barely the same person, I lose myself. Health takes a dive, relationships jobs finances. Mental illness is very real and very serious. Not everyone survives their mind living with bipolar. Can you relate?

27/03/2026

In severe episodes, memory can take a real hit.

Not just “forgetting things” — but sometimes entire conversations, days, even periods of your life blur.

Mania can overload the mind. Depression can shut it down. Both can disrupt how memories are formed and stored.

It’s the brain under extreme pressure. Do you experience this?

24/03/2026

Some days it feels like a superpower. Some days it’s survival. Living with bipolar isn’t one story — it’s extremes by nature. A pendulum. A dance between light and dark. In this video I list 3 best things about living with bipolar, 3 worst things. Can you relate?

21/03/2026

This video was taken just before I admitted myself to a psych ward a year and a half ago, my first ever psych ward experience. I was very unwell.

I had been in mania, rapid cycling, and I’d lost touch with reality. I was deep in a spiritual space, convinced that God and my late father were sending me signs through 10-cent coins.

I spent three weeks in the psych ward. It hasn’t been smooth since. There’s no cure. There are only interventions — and learning, slowly, how to live with this in a way that’s less destructive. I’m still learning how to dance with it.

18/03/2026

A lot of people have reached out to thank me for sharing my experience with bipolar.

It took me a long time and a lot of courage to start speaking about this publicly. I was worried about how it might affect my career, how I’d be perceived at work, and the judgment from people who don’t understand or don’t even believe mental illness is real.

But that fear is exactly why I chose to speak up, the stigma survives in silence.

If sharing my lived experience helps someone understand a loved one a little better, or helps someone feel less alone in their own mind — it’s worth it.

12/03/2026

With bipolar, sometimes reality can feel thin when cognitive distortions take over. That’s why coping ahead matters. Have a plan for yourself. Have a plan with the people who support you. Don’t feed the symptoms, ground through the senses. When the mind drifts, the body can bring you back, preparation is a form of survival.

11/03/2026

To the people who love someone with bipolar: Thank you for seeing the human behind the symptoms, for staying when things are messy. The illness is real — but it is not the whole person. The diagnosis is not the identity.

Unconditional love doesn’t erase the struggle on both sides, but it makes the road survivable. We can lose so much when we are highly symptomatic, we appreciate those who stay and see us through the consequences of this complicated life altering condition.

03/03/2026

Time to start refining my ‘Rap Attacks’, going to compile a book to publish of these free write ‘poems’ ✍️ The rhythms totally took on a life of their own, more like the words were channeled through me - not from my intellectual capacity - but from spiritual connection with the collective consciousness, politics religion philosophy war god nature love hate exploitation redemption confession. I which I will be working towards sharing with everyone over the upcoming weeks🤞🏼