10/11/2025
I’ve seen a few posts doing the rounds lately, criticising “gentle parenting.”
Now I always feel like a little bit of an imposter , not having kids myself when I talk on a subject like this but......
Usually they go something like:
“The world won’t care about your child’s feelings.”
or
“Teachers can’t spend 45 minutes validating emotions.”
But that’s not gentle parenting.
That’s permissive parenting — and they’re not the same thing.
Gentle parenting isn’t about saying yes to everything or avoiding discipline.
It’s about holding boundaries without shame or fear.
It’s saying, “I can see you’re angry, but I won’t let you hit,” rather than “Stop that or you’ll be punished.”
It’s still structure, still rules — just taught through respect, not intimidation.
Permissive parenting says, “I don’t want to upset you, so I’ll drop the boundary.”
Gentle parenting says, “I love you enough to hold the boundary, even if it upsets you right now.”
Compassion doesn’t mean there are no consequences.
It means the consequence is about learning, not humiliation.
And when kids grow up in that kind of environment — where emotions are accepted and limits are clear — they actually cope better in the real world.
Because they’ve learnt to regulate, not repress.
They’ve learnt that love can still mean no.
You can be soft and still strong.
Kind and still consistent.
That’s the balance — and it’s not weakness.
It’s the hardest, most important kind of strength.
