The Village Well: Full Spectrum Doula Care

06/24/2022

Love this.

"There is a phase in labor, appropriately called transition, where a wahine will reach her breaking point. She'll feel as though she can't go on. She's right. The kōhine (maiden) in her is not strong enough for the task at hand. It's during this time the kōhine dies so that the wahine can be reborn as a māmā, with her pēpi. A new, more capable version of herself with far more strength than she has ever known. From Kōhine to Māmā."

🎨
👸🏾 Jonea .pregnancy_free.birth

01/24/2022

05/24/2021

Look familiar?? You've got this!

Enjoying a relaxing lunch on this beautiful, peaceful Sunday.

05/13/2021

Good to know! 🩸♥️

04/30/2021

🙌🏽

If s*x is painful for you, you’re not alone. About 30% of women in the US report pain during s*x. And not just in menopause; many in their 20s and 30s say s*x hurts. Centuries of stigma keep doctors from asking about it, and many women think it’s just normal or are too embarrassed to ask. In large study, 60% of women who sought medical care had to see 3+ doctors to get a diagnosis. Most were told it’s normal or psychological, to try more l**e or different positions - with no further evaluation.

As a result most women suffer silently, assuming something is wrong with them. And the more we experience pain with s*x, the more anticipatory anxiety, shame, a sense of being broken, embarrassment, self-doubt, or relationship stress we experience.

Bottom line, it’s not just something you have to accept as normal, grin and bear, or forego s*x because of. There are root causes that can be healed including:
Endometriosis
Interstitial cystitis
Vaginitis
Vaginismus, painful va**nal spasms
Pelvic floor dysfunction
IBS
Vulvodynia
Uterine fibroids
Vaginal dryness
Retroverted uterus
Surgeries that affect nerve sensation in the pelvis or va**na, i.e. hysterectomy
Sensitivity or damage from cancer treatments
Sexual trauma

What You Can Do
🔥 Know it’s not YOU, don’t blame yourself
🔥 Speak up and keep seeking until you find a practitioner who will listen; you may have more success with a CNM or NP, especially a woman
🔥 Address root causes through a holistic approach - from a low inflammation diet to healing IBS to pelvic floor physical therapy to EMDR and other trauma healing - there are solutions

And in the meanwhile, yes, you can:
🔥 Use water-soluble lubricant for va**nal irritation/sensitivity
🔥 Set aside relaxed time for s*x when you aren’t tired or rushed; start with foreplay
🔥 Talk to your partner about where and when you feel pain, and what activities you find pleasurable
🔥 Try activities/positions that don’t cause pain
🔥 Before s*x, empty your bladder or take a warm bath
🔥 After, apply ice or a frozen gel pack wrapped in a small towel to the v***a

And check out my book Hormone Intelligence for a plan to help you find more ease - and pleasure - in your body.

https://avivaromm.com/book/

04/29/2021

Love this.

04/22/2021

04/22/2021

👌🏽 it takes work to unlearn the shouldering of all emotional labour, but SO WORTH IT.

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but here’s the bottom line:

It’s not unreasonable to expect of your partner that they care about parenting as much as you do, that they’re as invested as you are, and that they work as hard at it as you do. It’s fair to expect - to EXPECT - that they shoulder FULLY HALF of the emotional labor associated with raising children. It’s not incumbent upon you to make parenting more accessible, more approachable, or more digestible for your partner. You’re not being unreasonable by asking them to learn something new, or to make an effort beyond how they were raised.

If your knee-jerk reaction is to respond to this with a bunch of excuses, then maybe sit with that for just a second and try to figure out when it was that you accepted that it was up to you to make or break this whole ‘kids’ thing.

I care about you, and I believe you deserve the very best. Sit with this.

04/10/2021

Our moontime (period) is considered sacred in my culture.

The moontime is considered a time of power, second only to the ability of the Great Spirit to give life. That is how strong that power is. Women can ask Grandmother Moon for direction in life, for wisdom and for help for her children and others. Grandmother Moon can give her healing and balancing energy to women. Some teachings say that when women are on their moontime the Creator comes closer to them ❤️

04/08/2021

Start with the heart for those mind blowing moments ❤️💥

04/06/2021

Did you tandem nurse?

My middle guy was so jealous of babe, but nursing them together really helped their (and our) bond! 💗

he’s still suspicious ♥️👶🏼