https://www.psychotherapykuchenna.com/

Sylwia Kuchenna, 4th Floor, Georges Quay House, Georges Quay, Limerick (2026)

23/02/2026

You look calm.
Successful.
Put together.

But inside?

Your mind doesn’t shut off.
You replay conversations.
You overanalyze decisions.
You feel responsible for everything.
You can’t relax without feeling guilty.

That’s high-functioning anxiety.

And the hardest part?
It “works.”

It helps you achieve.
It keeps you ahead.
It makes you reliable.

But it also:

Keeps your nervous system in overdrive

Makes rest feel unsafe

Ties your worth to productivity

Makes vulnerability feel uncomfortable

Leaves you exhausted even when you’re succeeding

You don’t need to become less driven.
You don’t need to lower your standards.
You don’t need to lose your edge.

You just need better tools.

That’s exactly why I created my new course on how to control your anxiety — without losing your ambition, identity, or momentum.

Inside, you’ll learn:

How to calm your nervous system in real time

How to stop overthinking spirals

How to break the overfunctioning pattern

How to tolerate rest without guilt

How to shift from survival mode to grounded confidence

You can stay high-achieving.
You just don’t have to stay anxious.

If you’re ready to feel in control instead of constantly on edge…

Comment “ANXIETY” and I’ll send you the details.

Your therapist,
Sylwia 🤍

23/02/2026

Some people with Borderline Personality Disorder don’t struggle because they “love too much.”

They struggle because calm feels unfamiliar…
and chaos feels like home.

Let’s talk about something that isn’t discussed enough:

Why healthy relationships can feel boring…
and unhealthy ones can feel intoxicating.

In a healthy relationship, they might think:

“Why doesn’t this feel intense?”

“They’re so calm… do they even care?”

“I’m not anxious. Shouldn’t I feel more?”

“This feels flat.”

“Maybe I don’t actually love them.”

“What if they leave once they really know me?”

“Something is missing.”

There are no dramatic highs.
No desperate chases.
No emotional rollercoasters.

Just steadiness.

But when your nervous system is wired to expect instability, steadiness doesn’t feel safe.

It feels foreign.

Sometimes it even feels like boredom.

Because the body confuses:
Intensity = Love
Anxiety = Passion
Uncertainty = Chemistry

Now in an unhealthy relationship, the thoughts shift:

“I can’t lose them.”

“I need to fix this.”

“If I love them harder, they’ll stay.”

“When they pull away, I feel alive.”

“The fighting proves we care.”

“This is real love. It’s so intense.”

“I’d rather feel this than nothing at all.”

The push-pull dynamic creates adrenaline.
The inconsistency creates obsession.
The fear of abandonment creates urgency.

And urgency feels powerful.

It feels like something.

For someone with BPD, emotional intensity can regulate internal emptiness.
Chaos fills the silence.

Healthy love is steady.
Trauma-bonded love is electric.

If you grew up equating love with unpredictability, your body may crave what once hurt you — simply because it feels familiar.

That doesn’t mean you’re broken.

It means your nervous system learned survival patterns.

And survival patterns can be unlearned.

Calm love can feel safe.
Stable love can feel deep.
Peace can feel passionate.

But sometimes you have to sit through the “boring” long enough for your body to realize…

It’s not boredom.

It’s safety.

Your therapist,
Sylwia 🤍

14/02/2026

Therapy isn’t always comfortable — and it isn’t meant to be.

A therapist isn’t your friend, not every session will make you feel better, and therapists aren’t magicians who can take painful feelings away. The process can be challenging, and the client is part of that process too.

Sometimes therapy means sitting with difficult emotions instead of escaping them. Sometimes it means noticing patterns you’d rather avoid. And sometimes growth feels uncomfortable before it feels relieving.

I’m curious — what do you think?
Does therapy always have to feel supportive and comforting, or can discomfort be part of healing?

Your therapist,
Sylwia 🤍

13/02/2026

Səx is rarely just about səx. 💭
Beyond desire and attraction, it often carries unconscious meanings shaped by our attachment history, self-esteem, and emotional regulation patterns. When we look closely at why we are drawn to certain dynamics, we begin to understand what s*x may be helping us manage, express, or avoid.

Səx as validation ❤️
Sometimes s*x becomes a way to feel chosen, attractive, or important. Being desired can temporarily soothe insecurity or self-doubt. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying feeling wanted — it’s deeply human. But when validation becomes the main driver, our sense of worth can start depending on external attention.
Awareness can slowly shift s*xuality from “Am I desirable?” to “Am I present and connected?” — moving from reassurance toward mutual experience.

Səx as avoidance or numbing 🌫️
At times, səx can function as emotional regulation. It can distract from loneliness, anxiety, grief, or inner emptiness. The body becomes activated so the mind doesn’t have to feel as much. This is often not conscious — it can be a learned survival strategy.
As emotional tolerance grows, səx no longer needs to act as anesthesia. Intimacy can include presence, safety, and feeling — not just intensity.

Səx as power or control ⚖️
Səx can also be connected to power — holding it, negotiating it, or surrendering it. For some people, erotic dynamics become a way to manage vulnerability or to transform past helplessness into agency. Control can create a sense of safety when emotional closeness feels uncertain.
With greater internal safety, s*xuality becomes less about control and more about choice, trust, and play.

Understanding these patterns is not about judging desire — it’s about gaining freedom. ✨
When we become aware of what s*x has been regulating for us — validation, avoidance, or control — we create space for s*xuality to become more conscious, flexible, and connected to who we are now, not only where we learned to survive.

— Your therapist,
Sylwia

*xuality

12/02/2026

Intentions give a narrative and direction to emotions — but only when they come after we’ve actually felt them.

Emotions on their own are raw signals. Anger, sadness, fear, excitement — they don’t tell a story by themselves. Intention is what organizes that emotional energy into meaning and action.

Anger can become courage when guided by the intention to protect.
Fear can become awareness when guided by the intention to prepare.
Sadness can become love when guided by the intention to honor what mattered.
Excitement can become momentum when guided by the intention to grow.

But intention has a shadow side.

When used too quickly, it can distract us from what we’re really feeling.

We tell ourselves “this is happening for a reason” instead of grieving.
We stay busy to avoid anxiety.
We call avoidance “being realistic.”
We frame exhaustion as “growth.”
We justify reactive anger as “righteous.”

In those moments, intention stops guiding emotion and starts overriding it.

The difference is timing.

Feel → understand → choose intention.

When intention emerges from emotion, it creates clarity.
When it replaces emotion, it creates distance.

Emotions are the signal.
Intention is the steering wheel.
Both matter — but not in the same moment.

Your therapist,
Sylwia 🤍

06/02/2026

Psychodynamic therapy is built on safety, curiosity, and the therapeutic relationship. When those foundations feel shaky, it’s important to notice.

Here are additional red flags to be aware of:

There’s little curiosity about your past or relational patterns

Interpretations feel imposed rather than discovered together

You don’t feel emotionally held, even when challenged

The therapist avoids talking about the therapeutic relationship itself

Sessions constantly feel repetitive without deepening understanding

The therapist becomes defensive when you give feedback

You feel consistently unseen or misunderstood

Therapy doesn’t have to be perfect — repair, misunderstanding, and difficulty are part of the process. But you deserve a space where you feel safe enough to explore your inner world with someone who is present, thoughtful, and attuned.

04/02/2026

From Iahip Chair Jacky Grainger.

03/02/2026

💙 We believe everyone deserves access to the best mental health care.
🌿 Offering 1:1 psychotherapy & wellbeing support
👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Adults • Adolescents • Children
✨ Supporting authentic, meaningful & mindful living
🌐 horizonmentalhealthclinic.ie

Marta Majewska Psychotherapy

Sinead Fahy Psychotherapy

03/02/2026

💙 We believe everyone deserves access to the best mental health care.
🌿 Offering 1:1 psychotherapy & wellbeing support
👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Adults • Adolescents • Children
✨ Supporting authentic, meaningful & mindful living
🌐 horizonmentalhealthclinic.ie

01/02/2026

(PART 1) From a psychodynamic perspective, səx without commitment can reflect very different internal dynamics. In its more integrated form, it expresses autonomy and clear ego boundaries: the person can enjoy pleasure without confusing s*xual closeness with emotional fusion or permanence. Here, casual səx is chosen freely, without anxiety or avoidance, and does not serve to defend against intimacy.

In other cases, however, casual səx may function as a defense against attachment—a way to experience closeness while warding off dependency, vulnerability, or the risk of loss rooted in earlier relational disappointments.

Casual səx may also serve as a means of regulating self-esteem, where being desired temporarily shores up a fragile sense of worth or counters feelings of emptiness and shame.

Finally, in avoidant or dissociative patterns, səx becomes a way to manage overwhelming affect: bodily stimulation replaces emotional experience, and action substitutes for reflection. In these cases, the s*xual encounter is less about the other person and more about maintaining psychic equilibrium by keeping painful feelings out of awareness.

I will soon post more about it in the context of power, control, and validation.

Share your thoughts in the comments 👇

Sylwia Kuchenna

23/02/2026

23/02/2026

14/02/2026

13/02/2026

12/02/2026

06/02/2026

04/02/2026

03/02/2026

03/02/2026

01/02/2026

Address

Telephone

Website

Alerts

Contact The Practice

Shortcuts

Featured

Share

Category