https://www.psychotherapykuchenna.com/

Sylwia Kuchenna, 4th Floor, Georges Quay House, Georges Quay, Limerick (2025)

07/09/2025

💭 Depression in men doesn’t always look like sadness.
It can show up as anger, fatigue, or even physical pain. Many men mask their struggles, making it harder to spot. Here are 20 signs of depression in men to watch for:

Irritability or anger – Frequent frustration, short temper, or aggression.

Loss of interest – Pulling away from hobbies, work, s*x, or social activities.

Fatigue and low energy – Constant tiredness, even with rest.

Sleep changes – Trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, or oversleeping.

Appetite or weight changes – Eating much more or less than usual.

Difficulty concentrating – Struggling with focus, memory, or decision-making.

Physical symptoms – Aches, headaches, or stomach problems without a clear cause.

Risk-taking behavior – Reckless driving, gambling, or unsafe s*x.

Increased substance use – Drinking more, using drugs, or misusing medications.

Withdrawal – Avoiding family, friends, or social activities.

Feelings of hopelessness – Believing things won’t get better.

Feelings of worthlessness or guilt – Harsh self-criticism or shame.

Restlessness or slowed movement – Either fidgety and agitated, or sluggish and slowed down.

Decline in performance – Trouble keeping up with work or responsibilities.

Neglecting appearance – Letting go of grooming or hygiene.

Loss of motivation – Struggling to start or finish everyday tasks.

Emotional numbness – Difficulty feeling joy, love, or excitement.

Overworking or excessive distractions – Using work, TV, gaming, or phone time to escape.

Frequent feelings of being overwhelmed – Struggling to cope with normal stressors.

Thoughts of de@th or su!c!de – Talking about or thinking that life isn’t worth living.

💙 Mental health matters. Checking in on yourself—and the men in your life—can save lives.

With love
Sylwia 🤍

04/09/2025

Common Trauma Responses (and why they make sense) ✨

Trauma isn’t only about what happened — it’s also about what lives on inside us afterward. The nervous system adapts to protect us, and those survival strategies can show up as everyday patterns. They aren’t flaws. They’re signs of how hard you worked to stay safe.

Here are some of the most common trauma responses:

🔹 Defensiveness (The Protector Response)
Quick to argue, easily triggered, or bracing for attack. This comes from living in environments where you had to stay on guard. It’s not “being difficult” — it’s your body preparing for battle.

🔹 Avoidance (The Numbing Response)
Procrastination, withdrawal, or numbing with work, screens, or substances. Avoidance protects you from overwhelm — but it can also block connection and healing.

🔹 Dissociation (The Escape Response)
Zoning out, feeling detached from your body, or losing chunks of time. This is the nervous system’s escape hatch when the pain feels unbearable.

🔹 People-Pleasing & Self-Betrayal (The Appeasement Response)
Silencing your needs, over-apologizing, or saying “yes” when you want to say “no.” If keeping others calm once meant survival, fawning became a way to stay safe.

🔹 Self-Harming Behaviors (The Release Response)
From self-injury to self-sabotage, these behaviors are often ways to manage emotions that feel unbearable. While harmful, they often carry a logic rooted in survival.

✨ Conclusion:
These responses are not evidence that you’re broken — they are evidence that you survived. They once kept you safe, but they don’t have to define your future. With compassion, therapy, and supportive relationships, it’s possible to move from survival mode into genuine healing and self-trust. You’re not behind. You’re rebuilding. 💙

Your therapist,
Sylwia 🤍

24/08/2025

Healing doesn’t follow a straight path or a neat sequence of steps. One day, you feel like yourself again—hopeful, stable, almost at peace. You start to think, maybe I’m finally through the worst of it. And then something shifts. You uncover another layer, and suddenly you’re staring right into the impact of your childhood.

At first, you want to blame others. Your parents, your family, maybe the people who hurt you along the way. You want it to make sense—you want someone to carry that weight for you. Then comes the depression, the heavy, sinking sadness that makes you wonder if all this digging is even worth it.

And anger—oh, the anger. It doesn’t just point outward. Sometimes it even lands on your therapist, the very person holding the space for you. That’s the paradox of therapy: you’re working on yourself, but in that container, every emotion comes alive, including the ones you’d rather not feel.

And then, almost unpredictably, you feel fantastic. Clear. Alive. You taste freedom, you catch a glimpse of who you’re becoming. But it doesn’t last forever—soon enough, you’re back down again. Up and down, over and over, and that’s the real work. Because it’s not about staying up or avoiding the lows, it’s about allowing the waves to reorganize you, to rebuild your personality into something more authentic, more whole.

For a long time, I believed everyone should go through this process. That therapy was for everyone, a universal key to healing. But over the years, with experience and perspective, I’ve changed my mind.

Therapy is not for everyone. Some people simply won’t change. Some don’t have the courage to face themselves, to sit in silence with their own emotions. Some don’t want to change—and that’s their choice, their right.

Now I see it differently: therapy is an invitation. It’s not mandatory, and it’s not the only path. We all have free will. Each person has to take responsibility for their own life. If someone chooses not to go to therapy—that’s okay too. Healing comes in many forms, and sometimes not at all.

Last part in the comments 👇

Let me know what your journey was like doing therapy?

09/08/2025

Most people who say “therapy is a scam” never actually did therapy — they just attended sessions.

“Therapy is a scam. It didn’t help me.”
Maybe. Or maybe you didn’t understand what therapy actually is.

Therapy isn’t magic. It’s not a quick fix. And it’s definitely not just “show up and get healed.”

Here’s why many people walk away thinking it’s useless:

They want relief in 2 sessions, not 20.

They skip, cancel, or switch therapists constantly.

They keep the real stuff locked away.

They treat therapy like a debate to “win.”

They want the therapist to fix everyone else in their life.

They gain insight but take zero action.

But here’s the other side:
Sometimes therapy does fail.

❌️ Wrong therapist, bad chemistry.

❌️ Wrong method for your needs.

❌️ Unsafe or unstable life situation blocking progress.

❌️ You’re burned out and simply don’t have the bandwidth.

Truth?
Therapy works best when you show up and do the messy work outside the room. But the right guide, right method, and right timing matter too.

If it didn’t work for you — ask yourself honestly: was it the therapy… or was it the process you expected it to be?

Therapy can be frustrating when it challenges self-image, because it doesn’t just hand us a better version of ourselves — it first reveals the less flattering truths we may not want to face.

That’s where the “you weren’t ready” sentiment comes in: readiness for therapy isn’t just about wanting to feel better; it’s about being willing to feel worse for a while in order to grow. And that’s hard — maybe the hardest work there is.

It’s also tempting to say therapy only works if you’re “ready” to be honest and face your inner truth. And yes, openness is crucial. But that explanation, while partly true, can feel dismissive and oversimplified — especially to someone who did show up, talk, and try, but still left feeling stuck.

“You weren’t ready” might be true in some cases, but it’s not a universal explanation. Healing is complex. Sometimes, readiness grows in the right therapeutic environment. Sometimes, it takes trying more than one approach — and sometimes, therapy is just one piece of the puzzle.

Sylwia 🤍

01/08/2025

The Sky Is Not the Limit – And That’s Okay

Pseudo-psychology loves to tell us that “the sky is the limit.” It’s catchy, it’s positive—and it’s misleading.

Yes, life is full of opportunities. Yes, we are capable of growth, change, and transformation. But the truth is, every single person has limitations. Whether they are physical, emotional, mental, financial, or circumstantial—limits are real. And pretending they don’t exist doesn’t empower us. It disconnects us from reality.

When we deny our limitations and chase a fantasy of infinite potential, we risk more than just disappointment. We set ourselves up for derealisation, unrealistic expectations, and a fractured sense of self. Over time, this can contribute to dissociation, identity confusion, or even trauma responses. We begin to feel like failures not because we failed, but because we were chasing an impossible standard.

This is one of the hidden dangers of toxic positivity, especially on social media. Endless affirmations and success stories without context might look inspiring—but often, they keep us trapped in comparison, fantasy, and paralysis. We scroll instead of act. We compare instead of create. We dream instead of do.

Real growth starts when we stop chasing the illusion of "limitless potential" and start accepting the truth of who we are. We all have strengths, and we all have limits. Knowing the difference is where power lies.

Let’s stop romanticizing fantasy and start embracing reality. There’s more peace—and progress—on that path than any hashtag motivation can offer.

Your therapist,
Sylwia

27/12/2024

🌟 8 Things to STOP to Break Family Dysfunction 🌟

Breaking unhealthy family patterns is tough, but it’s possible. If you’re ready to create healthier relationships, here are 8 things to STOP doing today:

💬 1. Avoiding Difficult Conversations
Ignoring issues won’t make them go away. Speak with honesty and compassion to build trust.

🙅‍♀️ 2. Enabling Harmful Behaviours
Excusing or tolerating bad behaviour only feeds the dysfunction. Practice accountability instead.

🧠 3. Internalizing Guilt & Shame
Stop carrying blame that isn’t yours. Release guilt and recognize your worth.

💆‍♀️ 4. Ignoring Your Own Needs
You can’t pour from an empty cup. Prioritize self-care and set boundaries.

🔄 5. Perpetuating Toxic Patterns
Break the cycle by replacing unhealthy habits with kindness, honesty, and encouragement.

🚧 6. Allowing Boundaries to Be Disregarded
Set firm limits and stick to them. Boundaries are a form of self-respect.

🙋‍♂️ 7. Seeking Validation From Dysfunctional Sources
You don’t need their approval. Validate yourself and surround yourself with healthier support.

✨ 8. Believing Change Is Impossible
Breaking cycles takes time, but it’s worth it. Change starts with YOU.

🌱 Breaking dysfunction is hard, but you have the power to create a healthier, more loving future. 💖

➡️ Which one resonates with you most? Let me know in the comments!

Your therapist,
Sylwia 💙

22/12/2024

🌱 Why Trauma Stays in the Body & How Trauma-Informed Therapy Helps 🌱

Trauma doesn’t just live in the mind—it’s stored in the body. When we experience overwhelming stress or danger, our bodies activate survival responses (fight, flight, freeze). If these responses aren’t resolved, the trauma can stay “stuck” in our nervous system, leading to chronic tension, fatigue, and even physical pain.

🧠 Effects of Trauma in the Body:

Anxiety, hypervigilance, or emotional numbness

Chronic pain or health issues

Difficulties with trust and relationships

Feeling “on edge” or disconnected from yourself

✨ The Benefits of Trauma-Informed Therapy:
Trauma-informed therapy recognizes this mind-body connection, focusing on safety, empowerment, and healing at your own pace. It can:

Help you release stored trauma in the body

Reduce feelings of overwhelm or stress

Restore emotional balance and resilience

Build self-awareness and self-trust

Your healing journey matters. Trauma may have shaped your past, but it doesn’t define your future. With the right support, you can find safety, strength, and freedom. 💛

💬 Ready to start your healing journey? Share your thoughts below. 🌟

Your therapist,
Sylwia 💙

17/12/2024

🌿 Healing Trauma Through Somatics 🌿

“Somatics is the language of our body. A dialogue between mind and muscle, an intimate dance of our inner awareness. It's where movement finds meaning, breath finds balance, and the Self discovers serenity in the symphony of sensations.”

When we experience trauma, it doesn’t just live in our memories—it imprints itself on the body. Tight shoulders, shallow breaths, tension we can’t quite explain—all are echoes of what we’ve been through.

Through somatics, we begin to listen to our body’s story with compassion. We reconnect with the sensations, movements, and breath patterns that were disrupted.

✨ Movement becomes medicine.
✨ Breath becomes a balm.
✨ Awareness becomes liberation.

Healing is not about fixing but about feeling. It’s about creating safety in our bodies again, one gentle moment at a time. Through somatics, we learn to soften, release, and reclaim our inner peace.

Your body is speaking—are you ready to listen? 🌸

Your therapist,
Sylwia 💙

14/12/2024

The Healing Journey: Reconnecting with Yourself

Healing from trauma is not a process of thinking your way out of it. Often, those who have experienced trauma develop a survival mechanism of over-intellectualizing or relying heavily on logic to make sense of what happened. While this can provide temporary stability, true healing requires stepping out of the mind and into the heart, body, and soul.

Trauma disrupts the connection between our body, mind, and psyche. It teaches us to distrust our intuition and emotions, to numb the body’s signals, and to suppress what feels unbearable. Over time, this disconnection becomes a way of life: we analyze instead of feel, rationalize instead of intuit, and mistrust ourselves instead of embracing our inner knowing. But healing invites us back into wholeness.

Becoming Less Logical

Healing often begins with softening the grip of logic. This doesn’t mean abandoning reason; it means recognizing that trauma lives in the body, not in the mind. While understanding your trauma story intellectually can provide clarity, it is only part of the process. Healing demands that we feel what we’ve avoided feeling, experience what we’ve suppressed, and open ourselves to the intuitive wisdom that residates beyond logic.

Intuition and emotions are powerful guides, but trauma can make them feel unreliable or overwhelming. Reconnecting with them is about learning to trust yourself again. This involves:

Practicing Presence: Ground yourself in the present moment. Trauma keeps us stuck in the past or anxious about the future, but reconnecting with your body through practices like mindfulness, breathwork, or yoga can help.

Feeling Safely: Begin to explore your emotions without judgment. Journaling, therapy, or creative expression can provide a safe container to process emotions without intellectualizing them.

Listening Inward: Intuition speaks quietly, through subtle sensations or a deep knowing. Pay attention to what your body feels when you make choices or reflect on decisions—it’s often wiser than your rational mind.

Healing isn’t linear, and it often requires patience, self-compassion, and support.

Sylwia 💙

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Sylwia Kuchenna

07/09/2025

04/09/2025

24/08/2025

09/08/2025

01/08/2025

27/12/2024

22/12/2024

17/12/2024

14/12/2024

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