09/30/2024
The aftermath of losing my firstborn has plunged me into the depths of grief, prompting a profound reevaluation of my existence. This anguish has filled me with self-doubt, rendering me uncertain about my value and purpose. Historically, my roles as mother and wife have been my greatest sources of fulfillment; now, I find myself traversing uncharted territory. Although my roles as wife and mother remain steadfast, Isaiah's passing has underscored the loss of other meaningful relationships. Cancer's destructive path through our family has ravaged my sense of identity, necessitating resilience that others struggle to comprehend. This experience has claimed not only my cherished child but also the vibrancy of our family unit. Isaiah's acknowledgment of his mortality was poignant, yet I was unprepared for the overwhelming desolation that followed. Fortunately, cherished memories and ongoing support from loved ones have revitalized my spirit, gradually rekindling my sense of purpose and happiness. From the ashes of my former life, I emerge transformed, fortified by experience and determined to rebuild.
From my journal
