01/22/2026
When I tell people what I do, "I'm a Psychotherapist" (I don't just say counselor or therapist to differentiate), they'll often respond with, "OH, I bet that's hard." No, it really isn't hard most days. I absolutely love what I do. When a client and I deeply connect, come close to solving that years-long nagging issue or behavior pattern, we both feel a huge relief, sometimes a reason to celebrate.
Therapy takes trust on both sides. I am human, you're human [thank goodness for human therapy], so we'll sometimes fumble, the pace has to slow way down, or sometimes expectations aren't met, and the tendency can be to blame the therapist - they just aren't that good, she seems too old, he isnt fixing me - or for couples, she's paying more attention to his progress instead of mine, or, now we're fighting even more, this won't work. It is deeply challenging to trust another human with your deepest pain. As therapists, we have our thoughts and feelings too, but we must walk a tightrope of ethical decision making and professional tone.
Some therapists are comfortable in cozy settings, yoga studios, their homes, and can take care of themselves so they show up well, ready, mentally and emotionally prepared to give you what you need.
But, we are human. Whether it's struggling with parenting, a divorce, a death, aging parents, financial surprises, insurance companies constantly changing or reducing rates. My personal example is I just had cataract surgery, started the estrogen patch, and have honestly felt off. It's good that January can often start out a little slower and it's a time for catch up.
Like you, I heard about Rebecca White, a Florida therapist stabbed to death when she was trying to help someone, in fact was seeing another client when it happened. It brought me to question. What would create such a response? When do we see danger coming? Should I take this client, (some don't get a choice)? What do we do about the burnout? We have an ethical guideline to not abandon clients, to refer them out, ensure they have what they need. Sometimes we appreciate a challenge, deep compassion and want to see if we can be the one to help the angry, hostile, hurting, traumatized human being.
I'm writing this because I want to send a couple of messages.
1. As a client, please know your therapist is human, and most of us have chosen this profession because we truly want to help, guide, and support people to become the best version of themselves. If you have a therapist, you can share feelings. If they're not the right fit, be honest, ask for what you need. You also don't need to abandon, rather build a relationship. We appreciate deeply when you let us know we're helping, give us a good review, tell others about our work.
2. Therapists, please take care of yourselves. PLEASE get supervision and consultation. Don't try to continue a relationship that feels off or unsafe in any way. Know when you need to refer out, call the police, report concerns, call the client's psychiatrist or other medical provider or parole officer, or whatever the case. Always have a backup if you're in an office setting alone, during evening or other hours. Have an emergency system in place.
The bottom line is, the system is broken. Insurance companies at the federal and state levels are using AI to deny claims. Complaints about availability outnumber the reality - yes, there are therapists available, but we are hard to find underneath those big corporate websites and now AI apps backed by investors who see an opportunity in our field to bank some bucks, rather than thinking it deeply through - is this really going to help the human being it is intended for?
My name is Cynthia Djengue, MSSW, LCSW and I'm a Psychotherapist, a licensed clinical social worker. I help couples and individuals with high anxiety, ADHD, attachment issues with relationship repair and mindfulness-based behavior change. I am a mother. I am a daughter to my mother, a sister, Aunt, a business owner, a crafter, a reiki master and Brainspotter. I am human. I want to connect with other humans.
Let's build better relationships together.
Our hearts and energy go out to all those affected by this tragedy.
