SOAR with Lucinda

SOAR with Lucinda I love working with individuals & business teams to apply proven techniques to reduce conflict, improve productivity, soothe customers, and increase sales.

There is tremendous power in using positive language for better collaboration & communication. Some people need help communicating at work to reduce conflict, improve productivity, increase sales, soothe customers, etc. Some people need help communicating with family or friends so they feel connected, heard, seen, or acknowledged. We work with individuals and businesses to apply proven techniques

to improve communication which creates positive results. By working with us, people learn how to eliminate what they don't want in their personal and professional lives so they can have more of what they do want

I haven’t posted in a long time, partly related to Covid and partly because I took on long distance caregiving responsib...
10/23/2024

I haven’t posted in a long time, partly related to Covid and partly because I took on long distance caregiving responsibilities for my dad. It’s been a difficult time. I continued to “do it all” for a LONG time, and this summer I hit a breaking point.

It isn’t possible to be a top performer at work, take care of two generations, be part of a blended family, lose family & friends, and forget self care.

I’m now in an intensive therapy program to regain my equilibrium and take care of myself. As part of my recovery, I’ll likely post more personal reflections mixed with tips on communication and collaboration.

Be well. Have fun today. ❤️‍🩹🥳

09/17/2019

Some people know how much I've learned from what Mel Robbins shares! Check out the first episode of her new show...

08/26/2019

Mel is sharing great info ... I’m going to be the 67% mentioned in this video

Some of you may be students. Some of you may have children who are headed to college. Here’s important tips that will he...
08/21/2019

Some of you may be students. Some of you may have children who are headed to college. Here’s important tips that will help them succeed.

Courtesy of Dr Leah Jackman-Wheitner (my friend for more than a decade)

"How to succeed in college: If you only do one thing, do Hint #5.

I got a D on my first exam in college. It was 4 weeks or so into a Philosophy Honors class. We'd spent weeks on Mill, Locke and Hume. Then we spent one day on Buddhism. I prepped for this test. I knew we had 2 exams and a final that would be our entire grade (no assignments, no participation grade.)

We'd had 4 weeks of class. I knew we were having an essay test with two questions. So, I studied Mill, Locke, and Hume inside and out. I was ready. I skimmed over Buddhism, because we'd only spent about an hour on it. It couldn't be much of the test, right? Wrong.

There were two questions. One on Mill, Locke, and Hume. The other on Buddhism. I wrote 5 pages on the first answer and 3 sentences on the second.

And I learned a huge lesson in how different college is from high school.

I knew when I walked out that I'd screwed it up bad. I could have spent the next weeks complaining about how it was an unfair test, or I could do what I did - suck it up, learn something from the experience, and bust my *** to make As on the other exams to balance out the first one.

It would have been easy to just spend my time complaining about the exam. And, of course, I did complain some. But it's a metaphor for life. When things happen, will you blame external forces or take responsibility for yourself and step up to improve what you can?

Here's my best list of what to do to succeed in college:

1. Go to class. Regardless of whether the prof says you have to be there every day, just go. You will learn so much more by being in the actual classroom. It's a good habit. It's a good mindset to have for all classes.

2. First day of every class, get two people's phone numbers. You will have questions over something at some point in the class. Get contact info for two people so you can compare your memory of what was said.

3. Take notes in class by hand. Yes, I know the excuses - I'll just type them then I'll be able to read them better. I learn better when I just listen.

I'm telling you - write notes, by hand, during class, with your phone in your pocket on silent. That's how our brains encode information most effectively. There's research about it.

4. Now - if you really want to get good grades, I'm going to tell you the best thing to do. It's time consuming. It does require commitment, but it helps like nothing else I know.

Rewrite your notes.

Yes. I know you're busy. But you have to decide if you want to be successful or not. After class or the next day, rewrite your notes. You can outline the info, highlight, note what page number the topic is covered on, make a list of questions.

I write notes by taking notes on the left column of a piece of paper. At the top of the right column, I write down things I need to follow up on, upcoming test dates, questions I need to ask the prof later, reminders to myself that I need to go back and look something up in the text, etc. When the left column is full, I take additional notes starting about halfway down in the right column. (I'll post a pic later.)

5. Next thing - this is huge. Actually, even if you ignore all my other advice and only do this, you'd probably be ok.

College is your job. Your job is to be a student. It is a full-time job.

So, you do it 40 hr/wk.

If you're in class for 15 hr of class time, then you study for 25 hrs a week.

If you have 16 hrs of class time, you study for 24 hrs each week.

If you want to have every weekend and evening free, then you spend 8 am - 5 pm every day studying.

If you have 3 hours in between classes, find a quiet place, sit, review your notes, rewrite your notes, study, read the reading for the next class session while the topic is fresh in your mind.

If you start your college career doing this, you'll get a good habit going and you'll be better able to gauge the amount of time you need to study in the future.

6. Go see each professor during office hours. Once a week, go see a professor. Get to know them as individuals. I did my undergraduate degree at a school with 26,000 students. It works in big schools as well as small schools. Professors want to know you care about their class.

You will have a much better experience in the class if you go talk to the prof. Just say, "Hi, I'm in your Chem 100, and I wanted to introduce myself." Go up to them after class. Go to their office during office hours.

If they know you are making an effort to connect with them, then they'll start looking at you during lecture and trying to see if you get it or not. If you get that scrunched-up, confused look on your face, they'll notice. They'll either explain again right then or they'll know that you're going to come talk to them after class.

This is your education. Make the most of it. Get to know your profs, then it's so much easier to go talk to them when you get stuck.

7. Do the reading before the class. I know you can usually get away without doing this. I know you have never read before the class. But seriously, if you want to be successful in life, you have to do things you haven't done before. That includes reading the material before class. Profs don't want to just teach the material in the reading. They want to have interesting discussions about the material. Remember, they have made an entire career out of imparting knowledge, helping people learn to think, and creating knowledge in their field through research They love what they do. They love when students participate and want to learn. You may not care about that particular class, but if you show some interest, it becomes much more interesting. If you do the reading in advance and ask meaningful, relevant questions, your professors will appreciate you and will go out of their way to make sure you're understanding the course.

In sum:

- You are a student. That is your job. Spend 40 hours a week on your classes, and you'll have time for fun.
- Do the reading. Go to class. Talk to your professors. Ask them questions.
- Take responsibility for your life and your education."



Credit: Dr. Leah Jackman-Wheitner and reproduced with her permission.

I believe healthy boundaries and focused attention on what matters most will move me forward. What do you think about Me...
08/17/2019

I believe healthy boundaries and focused attention on what matters most will move me forward. What do you think about Mel’s list?

Think you don’t have time for self-care? Think again. Taking care of yourself can require less time than waiting in line for your iced latte. And when you make time for self-care, you have more energy. When you have more energy, you are more productive. When you’re productive, your mood improves...

08/02/2019

I love this! 🌻 sharing from Nabila Cowasjee

Sunflowers 🌻 turn according to the position of the sun. In other words, they “chase the light.” You might already know this, but there is another fact that you probably do not know!

Have you ever wondered what happens on cloudy and rainy days when the sun is completely covered by clouds?🤔
..

This is an interesting question, isn’t it?

Perhaps you think the sunflower withers or turns its head towards the ground. Is this what crossed your mind?

Well, that’s incorrect!

This is what happens....

They turn towards each other to share their energy.🌻✨🌻

Nature’s perfection is amazing. Now let’s apply this reflection to our lives. Many people may become low-spirited, and the most vulnerable ones, sometimes, become depressed.

How about following the example of the beautiful sunflowers 🌻i.e."Supporting and empowering each other". Nature has so much to teach us.

Wishing everyone a "Sun flower"🌻 trait of turning towards each other on their cloudy and gloomy days.

Spread goodness... it will come back to you...

I’ll admit I’m still learning this lesson. Tonight I’ve been stewing because I sent feedback to someone’s leader. The fe...
07/25/2019

I’ll admit I’m still learning this lesson. Tonight I’ve been stewing because I sent feedback to someone’s leader. The feedback was objective and factual. I’ve been worrying that the leader will be upset or the person won’t like me. Well, guess what... that might happen 😣 I’ve decided to reframe it in my mind as an opportunity to say “this behavior isn’t okay”

The secret to success that no one talks about? Get comfortable with not being liked.

If you’re worried about people liking you-- you’ll say yes to everything instead of saying yes to the things that matter. You won’t ask for what you deserve because you’re scared you’ll be seen as demanding.

This doesn’t mean go out and be a jerk--you can ask for what you deserve and still be kind. Put a 💛in the comments if you agree!

06/10/2019

Recently, I was asked to describe myself in one word. I chose "fun-loving" and here's why... This word phrase is perfect for me because it means I love to have fun, I am fun, I am full of loving fun, I'm loving, I'm loving and fun, I'm fun to be around, I'm loving others, I'm having fun with others, etc.

What would be your word?

I have loved this song since I was a little girl. Happy Friday to all my invincible woman friends (and the men in their ...
05/10/2019

I have loved this song since I was a little girl. Happy Friday to all my invincible woman friends (and the men in their lives too)

I am invincible

Join me starting Monday in a Spring It On program offered by Mel Robbins. She wrote 5 Second Rule and Take Control of Yo...
05/04/2019

Join me starting Monday in a Spring It On program offered by Mel Robbins. She wrote 5 Second Rule and Take Control of Your Life (Audible program). Her January program Mindset Reset was awesome

I’ll share some thoughts from each week here on my page

https://melrobbins.com/springiton/

We’re almost halfway into 2019 and spring is here. Spring is the perfect time to check back with yourself. If you need a routine reset and if you’ve stalled out on your goals, now is the time to change that. In the same way that you spring clean your house, it’s time to spring clean your life....

Fun semi-selfie of a book I’m reading while my son enjoys the Tech Museum of Innovation in San Jose, CAI started this bo...
03/20/2019

Fun semi-selfie of a book I’m reading while my son enjoys the Tech Museum of Innovation in San Jose, CA

I started this book years ago and got derailed when the first exercise to identify a Should was “Call Your Mom”. My mom had recently passed. I cried. I put the book aside.

Last week SARK reminded me that dreams do not leave us. Sometimes we edit or revise them. Sometimes we abandon our dreams. Today I’m going to focus on Must and see what I find.

My son is one of my Must’s ... he’s amazing and I still tell him that he’s the best decision I’ve ever made.

Sometimes it's the smallest thing that might prompt the courage to act. Win the race that YOU pick because it's the only...
01/28/2019

Sometimes it's the smallest thing that might prompt the courage to act. Win the race that YOU pick because it's the only one that matters ⭐

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