The PSYCHOtherapist

17/07/2024

https://growtherapy.com/book-appointment?id=12976&utm_source=provider-sourced&utm_medium=booking-link&utm_campaign=provider-dashboard

27/06/2024

27/06/2024

My heart is so heavy this morning. I woke up to the news of a fellow minister in the Gospel and friend who died by su***de last night. He and I went to the Greater Grace Worship Center - GGWC Ministry School of Ministry and graduated with our ministers license in 2006. We would study together at my house. We would commute to Sacramento and go to class. He loved God with all his heart this I am sure of. My last sermon I preached at the River of Life New Creation Church. He approached me and said how that ministered to him and how I blessed him. I didn't understand how but I now realize that I talked about depression and su***de in the pull pit. Any time he opened his mouth it was to talk about the goodness and mercies of God. While all the while internally struggling. The enemy loves to play mind games and cause us to battle within our minds. My heart hurts just thinking about this. 😢.
I had a friend call me one night and asked me to speak to a young lady who was a minister who was actively suicidal. I called and was surprised she even answered the call from a stranger. I told her I didn't call to talk you out of your plan of dying. I just called to listen and pray with you if this indeed was your last day on earth. We stayed on the phone for 6 hours. She did not die that night or the nights after that.
Sometimes that's all someone needs is someone to listen and pray them through.

Su***de in the pull pit is growing and we can no longer stay silent.

As a licensed psychotherapist and Licensed Minister of the Gospel, I battle for folks who deal with the spirit (if you believe it's a spirit) disorder (if you believe it's a mental disorder) of depression that often leads to thoughts of su***de. It's a heavy call to answer but I'm here for it. Often times we as ministers deny/rebuke/ignore some of the signs/symptoms we often struggle with. This is life so I know everyone born of a woman has struggled at some point with a symptom or two. I know I have. I went through an entire season or two or three or four of depression with suicidal thoughts/acts....but God.
Hopelessness is a key factor with depression. When we lose hope we lose the desire to fight/live.
Today my prayer is for those of you who have lost hope that it be restored in Jesus Name.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you HOPE and FUTURE. Jeremiah 29:11

A few signs of depression

~feeling sad or nervous.
~losing interest or pleasure in activities.
~feeling irritable, angry or violent.
~becoming withdrawn and ~isolated.
~feeling worthless, guilty, or ~hopeless.
~taking unnecessary risks.
~thinking about death or su***de.

27/06/2024

TP-

Grief is a tricky thing. We all have gone through some form of grief. Grief is simply or complexly anguish experienced after significant loss. And a loss can be anything you lose (loss of a loved one, a divorce, death, friendships, employment, finances, security)
Someone can be grieving and not even know it.
HERE ARE SOME WAYS YOU CAN NOW KNOW IT

7 Stages of Grief...

1. SHOCK & DENIAL-
You will probably react to learning of the loss with numbed disbelief. You may deny the reality of the loss at some level, in order to avoid the pain. Shock provides emotional protection from being overwhelmed all at once. This may last for weeks.

2. PAIN & GUILT-
As the shock wears off, it is replaced with the suffering of unbelievable pain. Although excruciating and almost unbearable, it is important that you experience the pain fully, and not hide it, avoid it or escape from it with alcohol or drugs.

You may have guilty feelings or remorse over things you did or didn't do with your loved one. Life feels chaotic and scary during this phase.

3. ANGER & BARGAINING-
Frustration gives way to anger, and you may lash out and lay unwarranted blame for the death on someone else. Please try to control this, as permanent damage to your relationships may result. This is a time for the release of bottled up emotion.

You may rail against fate, questioning "Why me?" You may also try to bargain in vain with the powers that be for a way out of your despair ("I will never drink again if you just bring him back")

4. "DEPRESSION", REFLECTION, LONELINESS-
Just when your friends may think you should be getting on with your life, a long period of sad reflection will likely overtake you. This is a normal stage of grief, so do not be "talked out of it" by well-meaning outsiders. Encouragement from others is not helpful to you during this stage of grieving.

During this time, you finally realize the true magnitude of your loss, and it depresses you. You may isolate yourself on purpose, reflect on things you did with your lost one, and focus on memories of the past. You may sense feelings of emptiness or despair.

7 Stages of Grief...

5. THE UPWARD TURN-
As you start to adjust to life without your dear one, your life becomes a little calmer and more organized. Your physical symptoms lessen, and your "depression" begins to lift slightly.

6. RECONSTRUCTION & WORKING THROUGH-
As you become more functional, your mind starts working again, and you will find yourself seeking realistic solutions to problems posed by life without your loved one. You will start to work on practical and financial problems and reconstructing yourself and your life without him or her.

7. ACCEPTANCE & HOPE-
During this, the last of the seven stages in this grief model, you learn to accept and deal with the reality of your situation. Acceptance does not necessarily mean instant happiness. Given the pain and turmoil you have experienced, you can never return to the carefree, untroubled YOU that existed before this tragedy. But you will find a way forward.

7 stages of grief...

You will start to look forward and actually plan things for the future. Eventually, you will be able to think about your lost loved one without pain; sadness, yes, but the wrenching pain will be gone. You will once again anticipate some good times to come, and yes, even find joy again in the experience of living.

18/05/2024

Go see a therapist

11/05/2024

Setting Healthy Boundaries Step 3:
🌟 Creating Healthy Boundaries: A Key to Self-Care and Well-being! 🌟

3️⃣ Learn to Say No: Saying "no" doesn't make you selfish or mean; it's an act of self-care. Be selective with your commitments and obligations, and don't be afraid to decline requests that don't align with your priorities or values. Remember, your time and energy are precious!

09/05/2024

Setting Healthy Boundaries Step 2:
🌟 Creating Healthy Boundaries: A Key to Self-Care and Well-being! 🌟

2️⃣ Communicate Openly: Effective communication is key when setting boundaries. Clearly express your needs, expectations, and limits to those around you. Remember, healthy boundaries are a two-way street, so encourage open dialogue and be receptive to others' boundaries as well.

09/05/2024

Hey friends! This week, I wanted to share with you some insights on how to create healthy boundaries in our lives. Establishing boundaries is crucial for maintaining a healthy balance between our personal and professional lives, and it plays a significant role in our overall well-being. Here is one tip to get started:

1️⃣ Know Your Limits: It's essential to recognize your limits and understand what makes you feel uncomfortable or overwhelmed. Take the time to reflect on your needs and priorities, and be honest with yourself about what you can and cannot handle.

~The Psycho~

08/05/2024

This week let's talk boundaries:
What are they
How do we create them
Consequences of setting healthy boundaries

Creating boundaries for yourself is personal. It is not a community event and not up for discussion

07/05/2024

You wanna know how to boost self esteem, self image and decrease anxiety in little black girls-get their hair done
When you look good, you feel good, you do good ~Deon Sanders

06/05/2024